A/N: Some of you might remember this story from before. It's a trilogy, the third of which I never finished. Since I can't seem to muster up the brain power to get another chapter of OBW going, I'm going to try to edit this story and finish it. Like I've always said, I hate leaving stories unfinished. There will be changes, however. Originally there was a 39 and 58 pairing. I may or may not keep those pairings. We shall see. ;) But to the new, please enjoy and review.

Disclaimer: I don't own Saiyuki. Gods only know what I'd do with it if I did. heheheee.

Insomnia Delusions

By Languish Dreams

Chapter One: Thrice Denied

"Dammit."

This solitary word, unique in it's pleading yet cursing tone broke through the silent reverie of the night air. A froth of chocolate hair danced lightly in the warm breeze and a pair of luminous golden eyes slowly opened to look lazily at the stars above. Son Goku sighed softly to himself and tried, vainly, to go to sleep. For two days and two nights insomnia had plagued his body and his mind. On the first night he had shrugged it off, figuring that everyone had a restless night here and there. When he hadn't been able to sleep during the uneventful ride west the next day, he simply assumed that sleep would claim him hard that night or at least the next day.

But never assume, they say. It makes an ass out of you and me.

And now here, on this third night of insomnia, Goku was tired. Exhaustingly tired. More tired and listless than he could ever remember being. Lazy eyes roamed the landscape, desperately hoping to catch a glimpse of something, anything, which might chance to disrupt this sleeplessness.

His eyes finally wandered to the three occupants of the dragon-turned-jeep known as Hakuryu. Cho Hakkai, the human-turned-youkai mother hen of the group, was peacefully slouched over in the front seat, brown hair concealing his eyes. Goku found himself pondering how anyone could comfortably sleep hunched over with their arms crossed up against their chest like that. But somehow, someway, Hakkai did it with ease. Much like everything else the man did. The smiles, the kind words, the calming nature—Goku sensed more than that from Hakkai. He didn't like secrets, especially not from his friends. But somehow, no matter how many times he had gained courage to ask the young man what thoughts lay behind that fake smile that courage would die the moment he looked into those eyes. Such haunted green eyes.

A snort and a mumbled curse threw Goku's golden eyes to the man sitting—well, rather lying across the backseat next to him. Sha Gojyo, (also known as cockroach, water sprite, dumb ass or whatever playfully demeaning word Goku could think up next) was effectively sprawled across over half of the Jeep's backseat, one leg lifelessly thrown across the floorboard, the other pulled to the red-eyed man's chest. His head was currently thrown back spilling long red hair down the Jeep's side. Goku almost wanted to kick the kappa and wake him up, if nothing else to spare him the loneliness of the still night. It would be easy to pick a fight out of the man, like it is any older brother. A fight that would wake everyone up and would end, as they always do, with a few gun shots and Hakkai's calming voice trying to soothe them to sleep again. But the kappa then snorted again and began to emit quiet snores that made Goku shake his head and grin.

The warm breeze picked up again, slowly caressing them all in peace. Goku's eyes shifted as he saw the wind playing with the blonde hair of the man sitting in front of him.

Genjo Sanzo. His keeper. His guardian. His sun. Goku shut his eyes then, allowing his memory to fade back to that day…

The day the chains had finally released him.

The day the bars of his prison had finally melted away.

The day the sun had finally come to save him.

The day violet eyes had met his golden ones, a flash of recognition had shone in both, before being swallowed up and replaced with anger and hope respectively.

The day he had become free.

And though the man smacked him constantly with that irritating magically appearing fan, and yelled at him, and cursed because of him, and fired gun shots at him…and well let's not get too depressed thinking about the "love-abuse" that Sanzo bestows on him daily least some over-enthusiastic social worker should be reading, yes? Though he and Sanzo had a rather…unusual relationship together, Goku had always felt at peace with the monk. It was like he had been away on a long journey and had finally come home again.

Goku was miffed now that he realized he was still awake. He sighed again, trying to stretch his body out but only managing to weakly lift his arms up above his shoulders.

'I guess it's true when they say you don't really realize how important something is to you until it's gone.' Goku thought bitterly.

And Gods how he was missing sleep right now. He didn't even know why he hadn't been able to sleep. It wasn't like anything unusual had happen lately. Travel west, get attacked by random youkai, find a town, rent some rooms, and sleep. Get up and repeat. No strange magic, no weird Gods annoying them, no unusual happenings, no uneasy feelings…

'That's not true.' He realized suddenly. 'I have been feeling something.'

It was a feeling that, like a distant memory, danced in front of his eyes, teasing him to see it; but vanished before he could grasp it firmly. It was a feeling of dread and uncertainty so harsh in its conviction that it sent chills down his spine despite the warm evening air. He sensed it clearly now that his mind had finally brought the problem to a conscious level. It surrounded them all like a misty blanket, veiling the reality of the threat but dancing its existence before them. He wondered why he had not sensed it before. Thoughts of sleep lost, Goku sat up squarely and scanned to clearing they had parked Jeep in to camp for the night. He concentrated all the energy he had in an effort to sense something…or someone. But just as fast as recognition had dawned the problem on him, the feeling left. He could hear the trees rustling softly in the gentle breeze, crickets chirping noisily, the lapping waters of a nearby stream…but nothing else. No evil presence, no uneasy feeling, just the calm and serene silence of the night.

Goku sighed and leaned back in his seat. A dull throb had settled itself behind his eyes now, most likely the result of too much thinking and no sleep.

'At least the others haven't noticed.'

In truth, he knew they had noticed. It had been easy to be himself after one night with no sleep, but today had been much, much harder. Goku hadn't really realized how energetic he really was until he couldn't continue to be so anymore. Tomorrow would be his third day of insomnia. He wondered if he would look like some kind of lifeless puppet sitting in the back of Hakuryu.

Goku shuddered. For some reason, that thought had greatly disturbed him. He pushed it away violently, not allowing himself to get drawn into the flashes of memory he could not fully comprehend, least his headache grow much, much worse.

Condemned to his insomnia he lazily grabbed the food pack behind him and pulled out several meat buns he'd stolen from Gojyo earlier that day.

No amount of thought, it seemed, could make Son Goku forget his stomach.

A pair of slanted yellow eyes glazed fondly down at the boy youkai who was currently attempting to dislodge his thoughts with food. He had been watching the boy for some time now. He had been determined to find out if his hunch had been correct or not. When the teen had suddenly sat up and began to search the woods around the jeep, ecstasy could not begin to describe what he had felt as he backed farther away. The eyes twinkled in merriment and pale lips curled into a near cat-like smile. He hadn't honestly thought any of the fools could sense him. But finding the boy, this Son Goku, ever awake had made him see that they weren't all fools. Foolish, perhaps, but not a fool. Goku couldn't truly sense him he had discovered, but the presence of him, the aura. And that had pleased him more than anything else in the world.

After years of fruitless searching he had finally discovered the one thing he thought he would never find on this Earth.

"A challenge." He whispered softly, letting the wind carry his voice into the night.

And like a Cheshire cat, that haunting smile seemed to hover in the air even as he faded from existence.