House, with Wilson by his side mercilessly questioned the applicant, a redhead from California.
"I agree that it's just not a good idea to be touchy feely with patients..."
House interrupted, "You sound like a recording! Everything you've told me is memorized!"
"I've been to a lot of interviews" he flubbed.
After some more haranguing by House, the interviewer finally admitted
"Truth is,I never wanted to be doctor. I'm tired of the late night summons, the bureaucracy, and being treated like a walking prescription machine! I've always wanted to be...a lumberjack!"
"Lumberjack?" Wilson repeated with surprise. House looked taken aback.
"Imagine" the applicant's eyes now had a dreamy look to them " Leaping from tree to tree as they flow down the rivers of British Colombia, the giant redwood, the larch, the fir, the mighty Scots pine, the lofting flowering cherry, the plucky little aspen….I'd work all day, and sleep all night! On my days off, I'd go to bars, wearing my liberating dominatrix outfit"
"I just threw up in my mouth" House made a face.
"I guess that settles that" the applicant shrugged "Thank you for you time"
With that the interview ended.
The End