DISCLAIMER: I don't own the Mediator series. Although, I'd like to own Jesse.

This is a random idea that popped in my hear. Defiantly AU. Hopefully you like it.

Just so you know, I'm a very busy college student. I'll update when I can, but it might take a while.

Also forgive my crappy attempt at the medical lingo. All I know about medicine is what they say on ER.

Description: Jesse is left a single parent, after his wife dies. Can he let his heart open again for Susannah?

Three Years Ago

Jesse's POV

"Ms. Johnson, you are not pregnant." I assured the 75 year old woman. "It's not possible, since you haven't had menstrual cycles in 15 years." I looked over to a nearby nurse. "Get a psych consult down here."

"But I'm not crazy! I know I'm pregnant."

"Of course your not crazy. I'll be back to check on you." Leaving, I pulled the curtain back around, giving the "mother to be" some privacy. Looking at Adam I only mouthed the word "Wow."

Adam laughed a little. "One of those days, huh?"

"It's just a regular day in the ER." I said with a smile.

"Double trauma coming in. Car accident." The receptionist said as we walked by.

"Got it." I told her. Adam and I went outside to wait for the ambulance.

Adam and I both had our internships at Sacred Hearts Medical Center, and we both got jobs at the same hospital we interned in frigid cold New York City.

Adam breathed hot air into his hands, in a feeble attempt to keep warm. Cassie, our chief resident (and the devil reincarnated) came out to give a hand. After 3 endless minutes of waiting, we were greeted with an ambulance.

A Paramedic opened the back door. "I have a 28 year old female 34 weeks pregnant, massive head injuries and bleeding internally."

I looked up at the paramedic when she described the patient, and my heart stopped. How many 28 year old pregnant women are there in the city?

Adam and I help pull out the gurney.

"Oh my God." Adam said. I looked at him and down at the patient.

"Nombre de Dios... Jennifer."

"You know her?" The paramedic asked as we pushed her in. Another ambulance came, but Cassie took them.

"She's my wife. I need 2 units of o-neg. And a surgeon down here. Now."

"Jesse, if you want me to-"

"No. I've got it." I interupted Adam.

"But Jesse-"

"I SAID I GOT IT!" I shouted. We moved Jennifer off the gurney, and the paramedics left.

Adam flashed a light in her brown eyes. "Pupils are dilated. She's not responding."

"Where is her head injury?" I wondered. I looked at her black hair, and noticed is was soaked. In blood. Her head fell to the side and I saw a wound. A deep wound.

With my hand shaking, I touched her hair. It was both silky smooth, and damp.

I vaguely became aware of Adam and the other nurses. One of the nurses was doing chest compressions, as another pumped oxygen. He looked at me.

"We need to intubate her." I said. I cold barely hear myself speak.

"I'll do it." He told me.

I looked up at a nearby nurse. "Call the maternity ward. We need an emergency c-section."

"Jesse-"

"She's hemorrhaging."

He paused for just a moment. "I know. Jesse, just go to the lounge. I've got this."

I nodded, knowing he would do everything possible, and slowly moved to the door, only to be pushed aside by another doctor from the maternity ward.

Jennifer began to shake violently.

"Dr. McTavish, she's seizing." A nurse told him. It was the last thing I saw before I left. I couldn't watch her like that.

I moved quickly to the doctor's lounge before finally breaking down.

I waited for an hour. No one came and told me anything. I was starting to feel like the families we always have to keep waiting.

Unable to take it anymore, I left the lounge. The first person I saw was Adam.

"Hey. I was just about to come in." He said.

"How is she?"

He paused for a moment. "Why don't we go back in the lounge-"

"No. Just tell me."

He took a deep breathe before telling me. "She's not going to make it. She's brain dead. We did everything we could. I put her on a ventilator just so that they could get the baby out. She's in surgery now."

I couldn't move. His words stunned me. I realized that I would be a single father. That's the type of stuff that you have nightmares about. I couldn't raise a kid by myself.

Not only that, but my wife. My wife was dead. I'm a widow. It was weird to even think it. I'm Jesse de Silva, a widower.

"Jesse, you know Cee and I will be there for you. If you need anything-"

"I know." I told him. "Thank you."

"Doctor, maternity just called. She out of surgery." Alice, our receptionist called out.

"How's the baby?" I asked.

"I don't know."

I headed to the elevator without even a seconds thought. Adam came with me up to the 8th floor.

The doors opened, and I felt a little queasy. The floor was filled with couples. Both husbands and wives waiting, or holding they're newborn baby.

"Kate." Adam called out, getting another doctor's attention.

Kate looked at me. I knew the look. It's the same sympathetic look I give families who lose loved ones. "In 803."

"Is the baby OK?" I asked.

"She's a little early, but she'll be fine."

"It's a girl?" I asked. Kate only nodded.

I went in the room. Adam followed.

"Her parents should be getting here soon. Can you go downstairs and meet them?" I asked.

"Sure." He left, along with the nurse in the room.

I went over to to the incubator, where the baby-my baby- was enclosed to keep warm. She was hooked up to iv's and a ventilator. It was overwhelming, but necessary.

I put my hand through the hole on the side and touched her arm. It was soft. To anyone else, it would feel exactly like any other baby. But not to me. She was mine. My daughter. And for the first time since I that ambulance door opened, I smiled. For a moment, everything felt at peace.

"Jennifer." Who else would I name her after?

I looked at her Mom. My wife. I touched her hand. It was cold. It was then I knew that she wasn't alive. The machine next to her was making her heat beat, but she wasn't alive anymore.

Tears began to fall. I could hold them back anymore, even though I tried to wipe them away. Jennifer and I got married a year before, and only a few months later, she was pregnant. We met at college and dated for a while. She was a health teacher at the local high school.

"Abigail." Jennifer said. Only it didn't come from her barely moving body. It came from her ghost standing behind me.

I could always see, touch, and speak to dead people. This always makes my job difficult, but it doesn't matter. I get help people. I help them live, and deal with death.

I never had a problem with this gift until now. It would have been easier to say goodbye to her unconscious, without her beautiful brown eyes staring back at me.

She smiled through her own tears. "What were you going to name her?"

"Jennifer."

Jennifer laughed. It was such a sweet laugh. "That's sweet. But don't name her after her own mother. Name her after mine."

I smiled and nodded. "OK."

She looked down at our daughter, Abigail. "At least she's not coming with me."

I walked over to her and held her for the last time. I could feel her tears soaking through my white coat, but I wasn't sure if she could feel my tears on her head.

Do ghosts feel tears?

"I love you. Don't forget that." She told me.

"I love you, too." I told her.

She looked at the ventilator. "Turn that thing off."

I hesitated for a moment before turning it off.

Within seconds, the steady beeping turned into one tone. I looked down at Jennifer and she was beginning to fade away. Before she completely disappeared, I kissed her lips briefly for one last time. But only a second later, I was kissing air.

She was gone. For good.

Jennifer was my first love. And for a while, I was convinced she would be my only love.

I haven't done one of these in a long time, so sorry if it completely blows.

But please review!

-Amy