I wish I could do more than just write you this. I wish I had more influence, that I was more successful, that I could actively do something about the way stories about us are treated.

But I can't. This is all I can do. So I give you this.

"Clarke."

You knew it the first time you heard her say your name. You knew it, but you didn't understand.

Because it wasn't her. You didn't know this girl, and she didn't know you. She was wrong. Everything was wrong. She was sitting in a throne that wasn't hers, leading a coalition that she didn't spend her life creating. Destroying that small piece of hope you had worked so hard for. That she had worked so hard for.

But something had happened. She slipped. The girl knew it. The way she said your name, so soft and tender, wrapped around menacing threats and with eyes that were cold and not green.

She froze. Her face went blank. It was only a second.

But you knew. You knew it was Lexa that said your name. You knew, somehow, that Lexa, her spirit, her love for you…

It was alive.

And you would die before you let someone take it from you again.

You turn on your heel as Ontari sputters back to life. You have a plan. For the first time since you closed her eyes, you have hope.

You learn everything you can about the City of Light. About this AI that was somehow inside the woman you loved, who was her but wasn't her, who couldn't match the power of Lexa's love for you and the power of your love for her.

The knife and your hand are covered in black blood. Titus stands patiently beside you. He holds out the small silver tin as you pull out the chip- the AI, the commander's spirit, the last piece of Lexa's love- and carefully place it inside.

You lead the convoy to the City of Light. To the place where you know ALIE can truly be destroyed. You don't look back at the wagon that carries the body of the woman you love. Because you can't look at her, not like this. You won't look at her until you make things right.

Until you give the both of you the life and the love that you know you deserve.

You swallow the key that Murphy brought to Polis and suddenly, everything feels wonderful.

You don't have to open your eyes to know she is there. You can feel her presence, her love almost immediately.

But you've been dying, aching to see her and hold her again and so you open your eyes and she is there, green eyes and war paint dripping down her cheeks.

You cry, because even though it's only been hours the relief you feel when she wraps her arms around you makes your body shake and you hold her tighter, so real and warm and alive and here.

ALIE doesn't go down without a fight.

She sends everything she has at you. Preying on your fears and regrets and painful memories.

But it has no effect on you. Because you have Lexa beside you, and nothing in this simulated world is as real as that.

She protects you, slashing down your enemies with the grace and precision that she does everything with. As you approach your final goal you can feel her getting stronger, can feel the intensity of your love that is now so close to bursting from your chest you can hardly stand.

But she holds you up, keeps you steady.

When you take the silver tin out of your pocket she falters, unsure of what you have planned.

"We deserve better than this," you say. "We deserve to finally be happy. We have sacrificed enough."

"That's not the way it was meant to be," she says. She is heart broken; she is tired, she is sad. She has accepted her fate.

But you won't.

"I don't care. I will rewrite our futures for us."

She smiles. That kind of smile you've only seen once, when she was happy and light and lying next to you. When you traced your fingers across her skin and held her and kissed her and made love to her like you had always wanted to.

You destroy ALIE, with Lexa by your side. What you feel for each other is so deep, so human that she doesn't stand a chance. Her code cannot interpret your love and the entire world around you cracks and crumbles.

You come to on the cold, hard ground.

Titus rushes to your side and you give him the silver tin. You watch from several paces away as he approaches her covered body. You close your eyes, clench your fists, keep her face and your love clear and vivid in your mind.

You don't see the first twitch of her fingers, but you hear Titus' strangled cry of relief.

You are by her side without remembering moving. She opens her eyes slowly, like she is awaking from a long sleep. You grab her hand, feel the warmth of her blood beginning to flow again beneath her skin.

"Clarke…"

You collapse beside her, weak and emotionally spent.

"Lexa?" you whisper, because you can hardly believe it.

She sits up, and you are surprised at how strong and normal she looks. Like her body wasn't left vacant and cold. Like she didn't die in your arms while you wept over her, begging her to stay.

"I told you that I would always be with you." She touches your face, fingers gentle and reverent as she wipes away your tears.

You kiss her. You don't care who is watching. You don't care that an entire army of her people are staring, in awe that their leader has conquered death itself. You want the world to know, you want everyone to know that you, Clarke, the girl, the woman, love Lexa.

And so you tell her.

"I love you," you breathe, "I love you Lexa. More than I thought I could ever love anyone."

She curls her fingers around the back of your neck, pulling you forward to kiss you again. You can feel her tears on your cheeks but this time she is smiling against your mouth and relief is bubbling inside of you and radiating off of her.

"I love you Clarke." She presses her forehead against yours and you think that you'd be content staring into her green eyes forever. "I feel like I've been waiting my entire life to love someone the way I love you."

She holds you close and you know that never again will you let her go, never again will you let someone try to take her so cruelly, so unjustly away from the life, the love that she deserves.

"We will change the world," you say. "You and I. Our love. I know now, more than anything…that it will change the world."

Stay strong. Don't give up. Don't leave this fandom and safe place we've created. Fuck maybe someday. We deserve right now. And we will fight through it together.

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