Hi. This is the first fanfic I've done on this account and it will be rated M for cutting. This is sort of a Dramionaise story. Read and Review or I will have Hermione hex you. I do not own Harry Potter, only my disturbing imagination.

Hermione PoV:

First time:

I held the sharp blade loosely in my hand. It was the day after Cedric's death. I pressed it slowly into the crook of my wrist, uncertain at first but gaining confidence. I thrust it down harder so it broke skin and giggled at the sight of the blood bubbling up. I held it to my mouth and sucked the flowing blood off my wrist. This was fun, I thought happily, focusing on the blood in my mouth and nothing else.

I had been cutting since the end of fourth year. It was halfway through the repetition of our 7th year. I had been chosen as Head Girl, unfortunately the whiny ferret Malfoy was Head Boy. But I didn't see much of him, he was always off with Blaise Zabini. They were probably plotting Voldemort's return to the world. I didn't care. Well, happy Easter season to me. I just had a fight with The Chosen Boy Who Lived and my ex-Weasel.

I glanced slowly at the clock in the common room. I, genius witch of our era, had figured out how to get electronics to work in Hogwarts. Unfortunately for the teachers, we all now had a working supply of iPods and cell phones we used in class.

It read 11:43. Good. Malfoy would be asleep and Zabini would be back in the Slytherin common room. I was free to do as I liked now. I pulled my knife out of my jeans pocket, the jeans I wore under my school robes. If Harry or Ron saw this knife they would recognize it. Sirius had given it to Harry for his fourth year birthday, I think. I had stolen it from Harry as he spoke to Kreacher in Umbridge's office fire, and replaced it with my own under a glamour spell. That was one of the reasons "his" knife melted in the door of the Department of Mysteries. Oh, Harry and Ron thought they were so clever. But really, they would both be dead now without me.

I slowly pulled my shirt up over my head. I was wearing a plain white bra, white for maidenhood. Yeah, yeah. I cut and I'm a virgin. Emo doesn't mean easy, Neville. Sorry I got distracted. Anyways, I traced the thin scars on my stomach and side that ran from my ribs to my hips with the tip of the blade, some of them breaking under the slight pressure and leaking little drops of blood. I found an unscarred patch of skin on my side and dug my knife in tracing little squiggles on the skin. I laughed loudly as the blood ran and then sighed contentedly.

Then I froze as I heard footsteps coming form Malfoy's dorm. Malfoy and Zabini stepped through the portrait at Malfoy's room and caught sight of my work. I tried to pull my shirt back over my head but Zabini moved towards me swiftly and caught my hands. He threw my shirt onto one of the chairs as Malfoy came over to me. They both stared at my stomach and my arms. Malfoy knelt and pulled up one of my pant legs and saw the numerous scars there. He reached up to my zipper and I twisted away but he stilled my hips with a firm hand and pulled my jeans off. I shivered, and it wasn't just from the cold. I was standing in my underwear in front of two Slytherins who had caught me cutting.

"Well Blaise look here. She isn't so innocent after all. How long have you been cutting, Granger?" I could hear Malfoy smirking in the tone of voice he used and my reply to him was to spit.

Zabini switched his hands so he was holding me with one hand and used the other to trail his fingers along a few of my scars. Malfoy used both his hands to trace the lines on my stomach and I shivered more.

"Fourth year." I blurted out against my will. Damnit, I thought sourly and they laughed at me or my answer. Zabini dropped my hands and they stepped away from me.

"We've been cutting together since first year but we started individually far before that," Zabini laughed. Malfoy flashed his eyes angrily and for the first time I noticed that neither of them wore shirts and that they both had their own scars on themselves, but they had more than me. Then I put two and two together as I thought about their lack of clothing and the fact they had been in Malfoy's room awake, plus the tenderness in Zabini's voice as he said together.

"Are you two gay?" I asked, surprised. The nicknames girls had for them and the gossip in the girl's bathroom suggested otherwise, but maybe. Zabini laughed and Malfoy glared at him and me, but finally Malfoy answered.

"No. We're bi. What about it Granger?"

"Just wondering," I replied and glanced involuntarily towards Malfoy's portrait of a snake, and Zabini started laughing harder, Malfoy even smirked and I blushed. "That's not funny, Zabini. Shut up. And wipe that stupid grin off your face, Malfoy."

"Call me Blaise, darling. All my friends do."

"Am I your friend?" I asked.

"Sure. Mind if we join you?"

"Why do you think I would- Okay," I said in defeat. Blaise grinned happily and pulled his own knife out. I picked my knife up off the floor where it had fallen when Blaise grabbed my arms and held it idly. I watched with interest as Blaise pulled Malfoy towards him, sat down in one of the chairs and delicately carved lines onto Malfoy's arm. The expression on the ferret's face was peaceful, one I didn't think I'd ever seen on him before. I made shallow cuts in my arms observing their strange interactions.

"Can I see your blade, Granger?" Malfoy asked me. Blaise pricked a sensitive nerve purposefully. Malfoy rolled his eyes and said, "I mean Hermione." I handed it to him and he examined it carefully. "What kind of knife is this?" Blaise stopped his work and looked at it too.

"I don't know. It supposedly can cut through any substance in the world. You don't want to know where or how I got it."

"I believe that." he answered. "I've never seen one like this before."

"I think it's the only one of its kind."

"Oh and first things first. Of it gets out from you about us- our relationship and our cutting- the whole school might end up knowing about you and your activities," here Blaise glanced at my scars, "and Potter will find out where his knife went in fifth year."

I choked unexpectedly. "What?"

Malfoy spoke up after him. "We know everything about you Hermione. Nothing slips past us when it comes to you. We love you."

Blaise moved forward and caught my mouth with his. Malfoy- Draco -moved behind me and trailed kisses down my neck. Their hands slipped all over my body caressing me in places I'd never been touched and I didn't even think of pulling away.

I'm ending this chapter here, I've found that people are more likely to review when left in suspense. Sorry. If you want more click the review button. Sorry if some of the cutting stuff sucked, I've never done group cutting so I have no idea how that works. Whateverrrrr. Review please. Oh and next chapter could be lemony goodness.