Chapter 1

Maura sat on her living room sofa, a cup of tea in one hand and a medical journal in the other on her Kindle. She was content. It was a rare day off and she hadn't been called in. She was glad to know that her staff could handle things when she wasn't there. She had just taken another sip of her tea when she heard the familiar grumble of her best friend coming in the back door. She closed the app on her Kindle and sat it on the table in front of her. She reached for the saucer for her tea as she stood up to go into to the kitchen. She could tell by the stomping of Jane's boots that something was bothering her. She sat down at the bar and watched Jane as she moved around the kitchen, mumbling under her breath. A small smile crept across her face but she still didn't say anything to stop Jane's tirade.

Jane for her part hopped on one foot as she removed one boot and then the other. She threw them at a small pile of shoes by the back door. She was still grumbling as she took off her suit jacket and laid it across the bar and then headed towards the fridge. She grabbed a beer, leaned back to look at the clock on the oven, sighed, but it back and grabbed a water instead. She twisted off the top and took a healthy drink before moving back over to the sink. She set the water down beside the sink, rolled up the sleeves on her shirt, much to Maura's dismay, and proceeded to wash her hands. She turned around when she was finished tea towel in hand as she dried them. She replaced the towel on the front of Maura's oven and grabbed her water. Still leaning back against the counter with the sink, she took another drink.

"Do you want to tell what is bothering you so early today or are you going to continue to grumble about it?" Maura asked her with an amused lilt in her voice.

"Grumble," Jane answered as she finished the water.

"Get a beer. Forget about the time. I doubt that you are going back in tonight and come sit on the couch with me. Tell me what has you so tense right now. Did you not get a confession or something? Just tell me what it is, so I can help you think through it," Maura demanded as she got more hot water for her tea and then went back to the couch to sit down. "We both know that you are just going to stew on it for too long and then blurt it all out anyway. So let's skip the brooding and bitchiness and just go straight to you telling me what is bothering you tonight about your newest case."

"It isn't a case, Maur."

Maura cocked her eyebrow at this. Usually, Jane was only broody like this when they didn't have anything good to follow up on with cases. She had to admit that this was deeper and darker than usual, but if it wasn't a case, was it her family. Maura tried to think of anything that Angela or Frankie could have done that would have set Jane off. She couldn't think of anything and both Angela and Frankie seemed to be in a good mood today at the precinct. So, if it was one of them, they would have done something after she'd left for the day. That didn't bode well, but she doubted that it was a family issue. That only left one of the men that Jane had unsuccessfully dated in the past few years.

"So, what is it?"

Jane walked over and plopped down on the couch. She didn't want to talk about it, but she knew that Maura wasn't going to leave it alone. She took a pull of beer and turned to face her best friend.

"I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I love my job. I love hanging out with you, but I think that I there is nothing else out there for me. I am married to the job, Maura and that doesn't give me a lot of time to be with anyone."

"Did Casey call you?" Maura asked, very worried about her friend's mentality.

"No, I was just thinking after our last case. You know the one where the husband killed his wife because she made herself better. She did it for him and he was afraid that she was going to leave him, so he killed her before she could. I see too much bad to want to see the good in any one."

"Is that all?" Maura pushed.

"No," Jane grumbled.

"What is it really that is bothering you?" Maura asked.

"I am afraid that I am like my father."

"What? Why? Who gave you that idea?"

"My track record. I can't settle. I'm always looking for something better."

"That doesn't mean anything, Jane. I don't think that things worked out between you and some of your leading men for various reasons. You can't blame that on your father's foolishness about leaving your mother. I know that you are still very upset with what he did and you don't want to forgive him for that. I understand that and I stand with you on it, but just remember that the 'sins of the father do not make the child'."

Jane took another pull off her beer. She sat up to set it on the table before them. Still staring at the blank TV screen, she fell back into the couch again. Sighing heavily, she closed her eyes and dropped her head onto the couch back.

"I'm married to my job, aren't I?"

"If you are, then I am as well," Maura stated.

"We make quite the pair don't we?"

"We do. But, I think that you have nothing to worry about, Jane. You are your own person. You are not your father. How many times have your told me that? I maybe the blood of Paddy Doyle, a infamous Boston Irish mobster, and Hope Martin, philanthropist doctor, but I am not them. We share DNA only."

"But, you aren't a misguided rich artist or her cheating, lying, distant husband either," Jane added.

"So, we both prove that nurture is stronger than nature in our ways. I could write a paper on that. But, I don't want to do the research and just basing it on us would be foolish. But, I digress. What happened at work after I left that put you in this mood?"

"I started thinking about Casey, and then Dean, and everyone else I dated. I refused to bend for them and they left. Casey proposed to me and then went back to Afghanistan. Dean used me to get your father. I am a walking disaster when it comes to relationships."

"At least none of your boyfriends tried to kill you," Maura replied.

Jane had to laugh. It was true, but she wasn't sure that her selections were any better than Maura's had been. Maura had been a little more discerning and thorough after that instance, but besides Jack, Maura hadn't really been seeking another companion.

"Are we too old, Maura?"

"I am not," she answered matter-of-factly.

"Then, I guess I'm not, either."

"You have plenty to offer a potential mate, Jane. You're beautiful and strong. You're funny and sarcastic. You love sports. You can cook, even though you don't very often. You are very self-sufficient," Maura explained.

"Why thank you, Doctor Isles," Jane replied.

"Jane, stop it. Just don't worry about it. Stop pressuring yourself or you'll do something you regret. And, both know that it wouldn't be good," Maura stated.

"I know. It would be Giovanni and we both know that isn't really an option," Jane said and then sighed before continuing. "I guess I just feel like I've failed a little bit. I am the oldest. I am supposed to set the example and be the perfect wife, you know? I am supposed to the picture perfect Italian American woman, and I am sooooo far from that. Hell, even my fuck up of a brother, Tommy is doing better than me. He has a great kid and he's getting his life back on track. I have nothing to show for me. I have no legacy."

"I might have to say something about that," Maura stated.

"Like what?"

"Bullshit," Maura replied without much emotion.

"The great Maura Isles cussed. I am impressed. I didn't think you had it in you. But, seriously? Really? Why do you say that?" Jane questioned.

"Because you are a highly decorated detective. You were the youngest detective to make homicide and you're a woman. You've been given many awards for the work you do. You have Tasha out there, who is trying to make herself even better than she is in order to thank you for what you did for her and to help others. She is part of your legacy. So is Frankie and frankly, I am as well," Maura told her.

"How?"

"Because you saved us both at cost of your stomach," Maura told her as she reached out and touched the area where Jane shot herself.

"That doesn't exactly mean anyone is going to remember me when I'm gone, Maur."

"That is what this is about?"

"Huh?" Jane asked as she leaned forward and got her beer again.

She took a swig and then another, before letting the bottle rest on her knee. She could feel the cool condensation on the glass. She spun the bottle around and stared at the ceiling. She could feel Maura's deep green hazel eyes watching her, more like staring at her, but she couldn't look at her right now. She was lost in her own misery and mind. She appreciated that Maura was trying to cheer her up, but she honestly just wanted to stew on it for a while. She needed to brood because when she was done, she would have a game plan for her life. She would know what she wanted and she would go after it. It was just something that she did.

Jane was content to sit in silence until Maura changed the topic. It was a strategy that she employed many times and she hoped that it would work again now. She just wanted to be with Maura, in her presence and veg out for a while. Nothing a good pizza and one of Maura's nature shows couldn't cure. Or, at least that is what she wanted...hoped for.

Her phone broke the silence between them. She dug it out of her pocket. It wasn't the station. It wasn't Korsak or Frankie with a new case. Hell, it wasn't even Nina calling to follow up with her on some information that they were working with for one of their many open cases. She didn't recognize the number at first. She stared at her phone before answering it.

"Rizzoli?"

Maura watched her face. Her dark eyes seemed to get darker. Her brow furrowed in question and then relaxed. She blinked and the opened her eyes. Her dark brown eyes were onyx and there was no pleasure in them. Maura gasped at the sight.

"When?...I see. No, she didn't help him... I don't care what you think...She is with me... Yes, she has been for the last few hours and before that she was at the precinct working on cases...Yes, I will testify to that...You have no idea where he went?...I understand...We'll look out for him...Yes, if I see him, which I doubt we will, we will call you...No, she doesn't need that...I'll do it myself...Thank you for your concern," Jane said before she hung up.

She closed her eyes again. She wanted to hit something...hard. This was supposed to be the beginning of their weekend off, free time without crime interfering. She knew that it was a long shot, but she wasn't expecting the universe to throw an underhanded "Hail Mary" pass in the fourth quarter to keep her from her weekend.

"What is it, Jane?" Maura asked unable to hide her curiosity at bay or her worry for Jane, either.

"Your illustrious father has broken free from prison out west. The FBI was calling to let us know. They were worried about you, but they were also making sure that you didn't have anything to do with it," Jane told her.

"Like I would help that man break out of prison. He has done nothing but cause grief in my life. He could stay there and rot for all I care. I have enough issues to deal with right now. I don't need him complicating my life. Do they know where he is headed?"

"No, but they assumed Boston. He still has a criminal empire to run. He was still doing that efficiently from prison, but being closer will make things easier."

"But, they are worried about me?"

"Without Paddy out, you're a target again for other Irish families," Jane replied.

"Great."

"Don't worry. I'll protect you. I'll be your shadow until this is over."

"Jane, you can't do that."

"Why not? I basically live here now. I mean, yeah, I got my own place but how often am I there. We work together. You'll be safe at the precinct. And, if I know Paddy, which I do just enough, he loves you," Jane stated.

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"He's already ordered protection for you. He knew what he was doing before he left. He had things on the outside in motion. One of which was to make sure that you were safe. He isn't going to let his sins mar you anymore than they already have. But, he will use his forces to make sure that you aren't harmed for what he has done," Jane explained.

"That doesn't mean I have to like it," Maura answered.

"No, it doesn't."

"What are we going to do?" Maura asked her.

"Well, I don't know about you, but I am going to get another beer. Then, I thought I'd order a pizza and watch some mindless TV...or better yet, one of those nature shows that you record. That would be perfect, don't ya think? Want a glass of wine?" Jane questioned as she jumped up off the couch and headed for the kitchen.

"Yes," Maura said as she reached forward for the remote.

She was surfing through her DVR selections when Jane came back to the couch. She took the glass of red wine wordlessly. She took a sip.

"Animal or space?" Maura questioned.

"Space."

Maura picked her selection and then settled back into the couch. Jane stole a look at her. She shook her head. Maura was still paying for her father's sins. So, Jane wondered about herself again. She sighed.

"I think I want to splurge tonight," Maura said.

"Hmm?"

"I want pepperoni on my side," Maura stated.

Jane just looked at her and smiled. She knew that Maura was upset about her father and comfort food, Jane's comfort food, helped her deal with that fact. She pulled out her cell phone and texted Frankie. She knew that Frankie would make sure that measures were put into place.

He would tell Korsak. Korsak would tell Nina and Cavannaugh. Nina would start looking for Paddy through the internet. She would use every means that she had at her disposal. Korsak would get permission to start a rotation of drive by checks and an undercover to sit on Maura's house. Cavannaugh would alert the brass so vice and all their CIs could be on the look out. If Paddy came back, BPD would know about as soon as they could and they would take the proper courses of action to ensure that everyone in Boston was safe.

"That sounds perfect, Maur," Jane told her as she called the local pizza joint for Beacon Hill.

They were both not really watching the show. They were both pondering what Paddy was up to. They couldn't help it. They both knew that if Paddy was out, he was going to find someway to see Maura. He couldn't help himself. He was highly protective of his daughter, even if it took him years to acknowledge her publicly.

Jane knew that by the time the pizza got there, that they wouldn't really be hungry. She needed to be able to take Maura's mind off her father. The space show was losing their interest. She could tell that Maura was getting more and more restless.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" Jane asked.

"No."

"Okay," Jane replied just as the doorbell rang.

She paid for the pizza quickly and made her way back towards the couch. She dropped the box on the coffee table and waited for Maura to say something to her about it. But, Maura didn't. She simply got up, went into the kitchen, got two plates and two new, cold beers.

"I am never going to be free of him until he dies, will I?" Maura asked.

"You may have had his shadow on you, Maura. But, he isn't your father. He is just the sperm donor that helped create you. I hate to say that, but it's true. Like you told me earlier, 'sins of the father do not make the child.' You aren't him. You did everything that you could to make sure that he was prosecuted. You did that. You provided information and evidence to convict him."

"I know that. I am not worried about him hurting me. I never was. We came to an understanding about that. I mean that I am never going to be free of being a Doyle. No matter where I go. No matter what I do. I am always going to be Doyle's daughter and a target as long as he lives. He is the only thing that could destroy me professionally. He is my Achilles heel, Jane. I cannot escape him."

"Oh, Maur..."

"He will always be in the shadows. I will always have to worry about him. I've already lost a brother because of him. My own grandfather wants nothing to do with me because I am Hope's daughter. There is this whole other family that I don't know about. What do they know about me? What could they do to me?"

"Nothing, Maur. I won't let it. You don't have to worry about that. You know that the BPD is watching all the crime families in Boston. You don't have to worry about that. Nothing is going to happen, Maur."

"You can't be there for me all the time."

Jane looked at her. She knew that it was true, but she wasn't willing to let stop her from trying. Jane took Maura's hand and held it. It was all she could at the time. Tomorrow, she would call the FBI and figure out what she could. She would also make sure that Maura was protected from now on. She wasn't going to leave anything to chance. She made a mental note to talk to Rafael in the morning. She wanted to know everything that she could. Like Maura always told her, more information meant more of a chance to save Maura.

"I might not be there, but I can make sure that someone is that can protect you, Maura."

"I am not worried about me, Jane. I am worried about the people around me. I'm worried about the people I care about."

"I can take care of myself," Jane told her.

"I know that, Jane. And, that worries me more than you know. I know how take care of things..."