A/N: This is AU. Set when Harry was still a baby and living with his Muggle family.
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, Harry Potter belongs to Mrs. J.K. Rowling.
Summery: Severus is sent to take Harry from the cruel muggles he has been living with. When a suitable family is found to adopt the boy, Severus struggles with letting him go.
Rating: T
Author: Rikku-Gleeks-Out (Formally known as Al-behd-Rikku)
Warnings: Has mild mention of slash toward the end. Not between Severus and Harry! This is a family fic.
Severus looked down at the letter in his hands, before crumbling it up. He cursed, and then walked into his kitchen.
"What's Albus thinking? Me out of everyone? Why not the Weasley's? They already have experience in this sort of thing, not to mention . . . "
The man felt pain deep in his heart; it wasn't often he let himself feel this way, but for one person, the pain was always there. Lily and that damn Potter! He loved her and Potter had to steal her away, and then all because of him, all because of Severus, Lily and Potter were murdered. Their son was almost murdered. Severus felt guilty over it, and breaking down in front of Albus, he let himself cry.
His show of emotion was probably the only reason Albus forgave him and took him back in. And now this?
Five years later after Lily's death, he was being ordered to do something he was loathe to do. He wanted nothing to do with the brat. Nothing, so why was Albus ordering him to take him away from his aunt and uncle?
The letter was very simple, and despite not wanting to care, Severus had been a little alarmed.
"The child is being neglected, not properly fed, and we suspect abuse. You will go there and investigate, and remove Harry if you find his environment unhealthy."
When Severus arrived at Number 4 Privet Drive, he scoffed. There were toys in the yard that looked very played with and looking through the kitchen window, he could see that the house was well taken care of.
The boy was probably treated like a King; Albus was just getting old and paranoid. Severus rolled his eyes. Nobody seemed to be home, but Severus knew Albus wouldn't be satisfied unless he had a look around inside.
Severus broke in quite easily and without his wand, using a Muggle trick to get inside. "Smells clean, toys around, pictures of a fat kid playing . . . who knew he'd end up so fat," Severus sneered. "Doesn't look a thing like Potter."
Bored out of his mind, as this seemed like a pointless "mission", Severus checked every room there was. Nobody was home. "Figures that crack pot old fool sends me on a wild goose chase." He was about to apparate when he heard what sounded like a rat scratching a wall. Severus followed the sound, coming to a broom closet under the stairs.
The sound was low and faint, and the next thing Severus heard was a cry.
Shocked, Severus took a step back. It was a good thing nobody was around; he had really let his guard down there. "What the Hell?" he muttered. "Can't be the boy . . . "
"Alohomora," Severus cast quietly, disturbed that the door was locked in the first place, especially if the kid was inside there. Severus may have grown up a Slytherin, he may have served the Dark Lord for a time, he may have even caused the death of the boy's parents, but Severus Snape wasn't one hundred percent heartless. He wouldn't have came back for a second chance if he were heartless. He mocked and terrified kids at Hogwarts, but what he thought he was witnessing was something he had never thought to see.
True evil.
When he opened the door, he couldn't help gasp when he saw a small boy looking up at him with an owlish expression. His eyes were huge and full of fear and pain. The scar from the Dark Lord stood out vividly on the boy's pale skin, as did the bruises.
"H-Harry?" Severus questioned. "What are you doing in this closet?" Severus asked gently. It was odd speaking in such a way, but the boy was now scrambling to the farthest reaches of the closet, pulling his knees up to his chest and trembling. He was bloody terrified. Why would anyone do this?
"Harry, you don't know me, but I was sent to help you."
Though what help can a broken man offer a traumatized child? Severus wondered. It was odd feeling such an instinctive feeling of protection for this boy. But look at him . . . Albus couldn't possibly know how bad it was or he would have gathered him years ago!
When Harry made no sign of answering Severus or acknowledging he was even there, Severus sighed. "Come here, Harry," he ordered. The boy looked up at that. Ah, he was used to being ordered. How . . . sick.
"I won't hurt you, but I need you to come here."
The child frowned, but he nodded, before crawling out of the closet. His eyes blinked rapidly as bright light hit his them. He squinted up at Severus, waiting for instructions.
Severus set down on the floor, cross legged. He tried several times to smile at the child, but he feared each time he tired that it looked like he was sneering. He just wasn't used to being "nice" and he hardly ever had reason to smile.
"I'm Severus Snape, Harry. Are you Harry?"
The boy nodded.
"Good, we're getting somewhere. How old are you Harry?" Severus asked.
Harry pondered that question before he held up six fingers. He didn't seem too inclined to speak.
"Good job, you can count?"
Nodding, Harry held up ten fingers.
"To ten? Well done." Severus sighed. "Harry, why were you in the closet?" He tried again.
Frowning, tears coming to his bright green eyes, Harry started to shake his head.
"No, you can't say?" Severus questioned. "Can you talk, Harry?"
Considering the question for a while, Harry finally nodded.
"Are you allowed to talk, Harry?" Severus asked quietly. Harry shook his head quickly.
Severus had seen enough to know Harry was being abused and in a very big way too. Left home alone, locked in a closet, bruised from head to toe, afraid, but even more afraid to go against an order, and now this, he wasn't allowed to speak?
"Well, Harry, I'm taking you on a trip. Would you like to go on a trip with me?" Severus asked. He reached for the child's hand, frowning when Harry cried out. "I'm not going to hurt you."
Harry didn't seem to believe Severus, but he relaxed slightly, before he squeezed Severus's hand. "You may talk, now do you want to go on a trip with me? Away from the people who hurt you?"
"I'm bein punished," Harry said. His voice was horse and shaky, as if he hadn't used it in a long time. "When do bad stuff, I have be punished. I can't leave. It my fault." Harry squinted up at the strange man. "Put me back in, miser. You get punished too."
"No, Harry," Severus stressed, "You do not have to be punished. The way you're being punished is wrong. You should not have one bruise, and you shouldn't be so scared of me. That isn't normal." It may have been normal for some people to fear Severus, but Harry had no reason to.
Harry shrugged; he didn't really understand the big man. "Please put me back in. They comin soon. Dudders was good, so he at park with aunt and uncle."
"Dudders?" Severus questioned.
"Cuzin," Harry answered. "He good boy, Harry bad boy."
The toys were for the fat child Severus had seen in the pictures. This family treated that kid like a prized gem, yet they treated Harry like a pet, no worse then a pet. What reason could anybody have to treat a child this way?
"You're not a bad boy. I'm sorry, Harry. I'm so sorry." For the second time in six years, Severus Snape broke down. This was his fault. If Lily and Potter had lived, Harry would be . . . he'd be loved and treated like he deserved.
"Don't cry, miser!" Harry fretted. He didn't understand why the man was crying or why he was apologizing to him. "Miser, are you sad? If I go, will you be happy?" Harry seemed to forget about his pain and fear as he smiled. He seemed like the type of child that would do anything to please everyone. "I sorry I made miser cry." Harry sniffled.
"I have done a lot of bad things in my life, Harry, though nothing worse then getting your parents killed. It's my fault they died, Harry. I'm so sorry." Severus stood up, taking a deep breath, trying to compose himself and put back up his mask.
Harry squinted up at Severus. "I forgive you Sevvy," Harry said. "You sorry, so it's okay."
How wonderful to be able to look through the eyes of an innocent child like that, Severus thought. Why does such a child deserve this life?
"Thank you," Severus tried to smile, hoping it came out as less of a sneer this time. "Why are you squinting so much . . . ?" Severus asked, though more to himself. He shook his head. The child couldn't even see, could he? He turned his back on the boy, and then conjured up some glasses.
After putting them on Harry's nose, the man held out his hand. "Take my hand again, Harry."
Confused, Harry touched Severus's palm.
"Ah!" Harry yelled once they appeared inside Severus's home on Spinner's End. Harry pulled away from Severus and then ran over to the coffee table. He hid underneath it, trembling like a leaf.
"Bad, bad, bad . . . bad . . . " Harry cried. "You did magic miser . . . bad!" Harry covered his face, crying into his arms.
So this was what the child thought? He thought what he did was bad? That magic was bad? Severus frowned. He remembered how much Lily's sister had hated magic, but would the Muggle have gone this far?
Looking at Harry, it was clear that she would.
"Harry, magic can be a good thing if used right. Magic is a part of who I am, and it's also a part of who you are."
The boy refused to come out from his hiding spot, not believing Severus at all.
"Harry," Severus coaxed. "If you're a good boy and come out, I will fix you something to eat." The Potter kid was frighteningly thin; he didn't look like a six-year-old at all, he seemed much younger if going by his size.
"Come out, I'm not a very good cook, but I'll even let you help."
"I-I cook all the time. It's one of my chores. I get scolded if I burn the eggs."
Severus tried to hide his shock and disgust at the casual way Harry said that. No child at that age should have such heavy chores. Sure, picking up after yourself was an okay chore for a toddler, like putting toys back into the toy box, but cooking, and only Lord knew what else.
"Oh, well what do I have to do to get you to come out?" Severus asked. He was feeling frustrated, not used to caring for a child. The only kid this age he had in his life was his Godson, but he rarely had to care for him alone.
"I'm scared," Harry whimpered, "please don't make me come out."
Pain pinched in Severus's stomach, the feeling alien; he cared for people, but he had never really felt like this before.
"I told you magic was okay, Harry."
The child burst into tears again, before hiding his face back in his arms. He was really traumatized.
"Fine, stay there," Severus said, "I'll be in the sitting room when you decide to join me," he pointed toward a door that led to his study. Severus made sure to put up wards so that the child couldn't leave his house, and then he went to his study. He somehow felt guilty for leaving Harry crying, but he wasn't sure what to do if the kid wouldn't even come out.
Staring into the fireplace, Severus sighed, before throwing some Floo powder in.
"Narcissa Malfoy."
When the head of the woman appeared, he gave her a tight smile. "Cissy, I need favor, how would Draco like spending the weekend at my house?"
In the background, he heard, "Yes! Please mummy!" Severus smirked, before shaking his head. Little Draco might get Harry to come out from under the table, and maybe being around another kid would help.
"What's wrong with him?" Draco whispered, as he and Severus spied on the little dark haired boy.
"His aunt and uncle hurt him really bad and I was ordered to rescue him, but now he won't even come out. He's scared of me," Severus answered. "He didn't know about magic before I rescued him and he thinks it's a bad thing."
The blond gasped, "magic bad? Magic is fun. Mummy lets me play with my toy wand sometimes. Did his aunt and uncle really hurt him?" Draco asked.
"Yes."
"I might cry," Draco sniffed. Always the emotional boy. Severus just hoped he didn't end up taking after his father.
"Be a big boy," Severus said, giving the six-year-old a push. "His name is Harry."
The blond nodded. He walked over to the coffee table and bent down to gaze at Harry. "Hey you, kid, come out right now. Uncle Sevvy isn't scary, you know? You should come out and eat."
Severus shook his head. Bossy Draco . . . the kid was spoiled, but he was an only child, and he was a good kid.
Harry jerked, looking up when he heard a kid's voice. He stopped crying, his tears turning into slow hiccups. "Who're you?" Harry asked. He didn't really mind being bossed around; he was used to it. Even so, he still wouldn't come out.
"Draco. Draco Malfoy," the blond answered, as if Harry should know him. "You look really bad," Draco started to say, squeaking when Severus gently nudged him.
Harry started to cry again.
"I meant your owwies look very bad. Let Sevvy help you, now."
"H-how?" Harry asked in a trembling voice.
"With maag..." Draco's words became muffled when Severus put his hand over his mouth.
"Shush now Draco and run along and fetch the healing cream." This was no time to run on about magic and waving his wand around.
With a pout at Severus's action, Draco ran off to the bathroom. He returned, holding a jar of very strong healing cream. Harry's eyes widened when he recognized what Draco held, though the stuff he used to put on his bruises weren't of the magical variety. The child crawled out from under the table finally and took the jar from Draco.
"Well you could have asked for it," Draco grumbled.
Harry jumped at Draco's tone, nearly scrambling back under the coffee table. He didn't get far, before Severus picked him up and held him gently, in a way he never thought he'd hold anyone, let along a child of Potter's.
"Calm down boy, I'm not going to hurt you, and don't be afraid of Draco, he's a good kid, a little brat," Severus said with a smirk and at his words, Draco just stuck his tongue out at him, "but he means well. Let me put that on your . . . owies." He felt quite ridiculous talking that way, but he had to remember he was talking to a skittish child.
After what felt like forever, Harry finally relaxed in Severus's arms, feeling the warmth of an embrace, something he had never felt before, at least his simple mind couldn't remember if he had ever felt this way.
"No," the child whispered, "I am supposed to put it on myself. I take care of myself." Harry looked down at Draco and considered him for a moment, before deciding the blond didn't look as bad as Dudders did.
"Are you really a brat?" Harry asked.
Draco smirked in all his six-year-old glory, "Yep, but you'll love me."
Severus rolled his eyes. Children.
"I don't even know what that means," Harry mumbled.
Shaking his head sadly, Severus let Harry down and when the child refused to let him put the cream on, Severus pushed him toward the bathroom. "Make sure you cover every bruise, every scrape, everywhere that hurts."
For five days, Severus cared over Harry, fattening the boy up and teaching him what it felt like to be looked after properly, at least Severus did his best to care for him properly. It wasn't easy taking care of a skittish child, who was scared of his shadow one second and another, he was running around and acting like the kid he was supposed to be. Draco stayed with them for the weekend and by the time he had left, he had made Severus promise to invite him over to play with Harry again.
With a sigh, Severus set down on his couch, pulling Harry up onto his lap. He was slowly teaching the kid about magic and every day he read to Harry from either low level Defense of the Dark Arts, or Care of Magical Creatures books. Harry loved the animals.
It was his sixth day of caring for Harry when Albus suddenly decided to show his face again. He popped into the room, freaking Harry out so much, that the dark haired child screamed and hid his face against Severus's chest.
"Albus," Severus glared, "you could have come in a quieter way. Why haven't you contacted me? I sent you an owl about Harry's condition."
"Forgive me Severus, I have been working nonstop trying to find a home for poor Harry here. Finally, I have found someone to take him in. I apologize for leaving the burden of watching him with you. I know you dislike children."
Severus controlled the heartbroken look he wanted to send Albus. As silly as it might have been, he had though Harry would be staying with him. Of course, that was crazy. He was an ex Death Eater. He couldn't raise The Boy Who Lived, or any child at that.
"What family?" Severus managed to ask, priding himself with how calm he had kept his voice. Six days and he was deeply attached to the kid. Harry chanced a peek out at the old looking man, sensing something bad was about to happen. He started to whimper, digging closer to Severus, as if he were an octopus with suction cups.
"As many children as they already have, the Weasley family have gladly said they would open their hearts for Harry here. He will be well cared for. I will take Harry now."
"No!" Harry yelled.
Severus fought his emotions as he coaxed the boy to go with Albus. He knew this was for the child's best interest.
"Shh, Harry, we found you a new home finally," Albus cooed.
"Be good Harry," Severus said, forcing himself to turn away, so that this wouldn't be as hard. If someone had told him that one day he would love Harry Potter, The Boy Who Lived, he would have thought they were mental, and he probably would have hexed them for even suggesting he could ever love a part of James Potter. But Severus did love Harry, but he wasn't a family man, and Harry was better off with a proper mother and father.
Yes, he was sure this was what Harry needed.
When Severus heard the pop that told him Albus and Harry were gone, the ex Death Eater let out an anguished cry. Every instinct was telling him to go after Albus and take his boy back . . . Not his, boy . . . Severus shook his head, cursing himself for thinking such a way.
"Noooooo!" Harry screamed. He picked up a glass and threw it when Molly tried to offer him a drink.
"No no no no no," Harry repeated over and over again. He curled up into a little ball and cried, kicking out when Molly tried to comfort him.
She hadn't realized how troubled the kid was. This was horrible.
"Harry, honey, please I'm your new mummy, this is your new daddy," she pointed to her husband, who was very white in the face. Neither of them had ever seen such a child before. Five-year-old Ginny, and six-year-old Ron were watching Harry with wide eyes. It wasn't long before they were crying too.
The eight-year-old twins ran into the room, followed by nine-year-old Percy. Fred and George held their eyes and tried to ask their mum what was going on. Percy on the other hand walked over to Harry and stared down at him with a perplexed look on his face.
"Has anyone thought to ask him why he's so upset?" Percy asked. He was far above his age.
Molly sighed, "oh dear, Harry, darling, why are you sad?"
Harry stopped crying and pointed at Arthur. "He no daddy! Not daddy! Sevvy. I want Sevvy!"
With a sigh, Molly bit down on her lower lip. "What do you mean Harry? Who's Sevvy?"
Harry burst into tears again. "Please."
Twelve-year-old Charlie rushed into the room, his eyes looking wide and terrified. "Where's the fire? Who's screaming bloody murder, oh . . who's that?" He blinked down at Harry, who was still begging for "Sevvy" though nobody could quite understand the kid as he was crying too hard.
"Harry Potter," Molly explained, "we're to adopt him now."
"Mum," Charlie whined, "I have enough brothers. 'Sides, it seems he wants someone else anyway. Who was he living with before he came here?"
"Well, Severus Snape."
"Severus Snape!" Charlie gasped. "That old fool. He's a horrible mean professor."
Harry scrunched up his nose, before picking up a plastic cup and throwing it at Charlie. "Nu uh! Sevvy is good."
"Oh dear, he's become attached to Severus," Molly murmured. "Poor thing . . . " Molly had every right to believe Severus would want nothing to do with taking care of a kid long term. If only she knew that right now across town, Severus Snape was cursing James and Lily Potter for messing with his life even now. He wanted Harry back in his home, as out of character as that may have seemed to people around him.
"I hate you!" Harry screamed.
Bill Weasley was trying to give the kid a bath. The fourteen-year-old gritted his teeth in suppressed anger. Harry was just a kid after all, but Bill really had no idea how to deal with him. Everyone was trying to take care of him and love him, but Harry was inconsolable. He didn't want to be touched or fed and he wouldn't play with anyone. For the most part he stayed curled up in a ball, hugging one of Charlie's Defense of the Dark Arts books.
"Mum!" Bill yelled. "Sit still Harry," he told the boy, wishing he could use his wand to clean him, but he wasn't allowed.
"Mum, please can you do this? He bit me twice." Bill felt broken by the way Harry acted, everyone did. It was the most horrific thing they had ever seen. Ginny and Ron didn't understand, but they always cried when Harry cried.
Molly came into the room, holding both Ginny and Ron, "Bill please, I have my hands full. Harry, please be good for Bill."
"Sevvy?" Harry questioned.
"I'm sorry, he isn't coming." Molly nearly started to cry herself when Harry's face crumbled, and he started to cry, not scream or throw a tantrum, just cry like someone had just broke his heart.
Severus paced back and forth in front of his full length mirror. He imagined himself going to the Burrow and asking to see Harry. No, he imagined himself going over there and demanding they give Harry back. He groaned. They wouldn't do that. Harry was surely living the life he should have always lived if his parents hadn't died by now.
He was better off, but Severus Snape's heart was broken for the second time in his life. The first time was when Lily married James. He knew this feeling, he truly was in love with the kid, knowing this was how he would feel had he and Lily ever . . . Had things been different and he married Lily and had his own child.
I'm not a good guy. How can I possibly raise a child? What could I offer him? Severus wrung his hands, before using his wand to shatter the mirror. He would have to change for Harry. Yes, he knew that. He had already changed so much, but if he wanted to adopt Harry, he knew he had to be a better person. For Harry, of course. The only trouble was finding a way to get custody of the kid.
Feeling a little better after his outburst, Severus fixed the mirror, before apparating to where he needed to be. He come up to the Burrow, his eyes wide when the first thing he heard was a mad house.
There was at least three kids crying, and another couple screaming what sounded like "shut up dummies" and another voice that sounded like reason, "please be good," and yet another voice that sounded annoyed, "God!" and yet another voice that sounded protective, "It'll be okay, just stop crying." Then there was the unmistakable voice of Molly Weasley, "Oh dear," and her husband, "deep breaths Molly, it's a phase, he'll open up."
"How many brats does Weasley have?" Severus wondered.
"Hello, anyone home!" Severus yelled, though there really was no reason to yell.
"Sevvy!" Severus heard Harry cry from the other side of the door. The door burst off it's hinges practically and the next thing Severus knew, Harry was snug in his arms.
"He used magic," Fred and George yelled.
"Shut up," Charlie scolded.
Quite pale, even for a redhead, Molly Weasley walked outside, her eyes widening at the sight of Harry and Severus Snape. Harry was clinging to him as if for dear life, and Severus was embracing him like a man who had been starving for love and finally found it.
"Severus," Molly said in a shaky voice.
"Molly," Severus greeted. "I've come to take Harry home." Harry's home was wherever Severus was. Severus knew that now.
"You Severus? Home?" Molly was startled by the protectiveness she saw glowing in Severus's eyes as he looked down at Harry's head.
"Indeed. I am talking my child home. I have my work cut out for me. This place has undone everything I worked at in repairing Harry's damage." He gave the bunch of redheads a glare. "Couldn't you tell he was unhappy?"
Molly started to cry, "we tried our best. We didn't know what to do, Severus."
Harry pulled away from Severus and looked into his onyx eyes, "I wanna go home. I wanna go home with you. D-daddy," he blushed, before looking down. He was smart enough to know Severus wasn't his real dad, but Harry didn't have a dad, so he wanted Severus to be his dad. "Please?"
Severus ruffled Harry's hair, "Yeah, Harry can come home. . . That is if . . ." Severus glanced over at Molly and Arthur. "What do I have to do to get custody of Harry?" Fear was clear in Severus's eyes; he knew he wasn't what the Ministry would consider a fit parent, but Harry wanted him, and he wanted Harry.
Molly smiled, "I will contact Albus. He's got all the right connections."
"Thank you, Molly."
"Dad!" Harry ran into the Potion classroom, skidding to a halt when he saw Severus sitting at his desk. The man was half asleep. Harry snickered when Severus started awake.
"Damn, kid, you never wake me up gently, do you?"
Harry smirked, "Where's the fun in that?"
"Indeed, what's so important that you had to wake me up?"
"Oh . . . you know Draco?"
Severus snorted, "You mean the blond brat you grew up with? The boy who've called friend since you were six?"
"Yeah, that one," Harry laughed. To people who didn't know them, it seemed very odd that Harry, who was in Gryffindor and Draco, who was in Slytherin were friends, even stranger, Harry's dad was the head of Slytherin house.
"I had a dream from back when we were six and Draco told me that I was going to love him, and then the dream change, and Draco was back to his normal self, and he kissed me."
Severus stood up so fast that he knocked everything off his desk. "You're way too young to have dreams like that! No son of mine will do that until he's forty years old, you got it?"
Harry rolled his eyes. "You're going to have to let me go someday."
"I will, when you're forty."
"I love you, too."
"Indeed."
FIN