Rebirth
Author's Note:
Apparently it's Jerza week or something?
I don't know, I just had this lying around for a while and wanted to post it. I'm really like urghh about it because it's not in the style I usually use so I'm not 100% sure about it, but whatever.
I'm writing the final chapter(s?) now cause I'm not happy with them as yet. This is meant to be closure between these two and is an idea I've bounced around for a while.
Yes there are spoilers, not for the whole arc but some of it. You were warned. It is M for a reason for the chapters I am editing. I refuse flames but will take constructive criticism; reviews/favs/follows are love!
The first two chapters are technically T rated so they are safe to read if you don't want the adult stuff.
Warning: Some spoilers for Tartarus arc. Adult content in later chapters.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the following characters/setting etc. Disclaimer for whole story.
One
He stirs from his bed in the make-shift Guild that has been produced through the efforts of his comrades.
Crime Sorcière is made up of mages like him, those who have strayed from the path of light. They were once hunted by the Council, until its destruction. But they are not welcomed in Fiore and unable to share connections with other Guilds. They are a group of misfits and lost souls who only wish to repent before they die.
Jellal moves quietly, attempting not to disturb Meredy.
The young woman is strong and continues on with steely determination each day. But occasionally she remembers and the tears come unbidden. They both know that when she seeks him out it is because she cares for him and that she relies on him now. Ultear is gone; having sacrificed herself for the world she once thought had rejected her. Meredy has explained it to him before; when she wakes from a nightmare she seeks those she trusts. Crime Sorcière has new members, those from Oración Seis who were defeated by Jellal. He is their leader now and they work together to hunt down Zeref. But in the night when her dreams turn dark, Meredy doesn't want comfort from them.
Jellal is still uncertain as to whether Meredy has formed romantic feelings for him. She has never acted in any way other than that of a little sister, but perhaps that is because they both know that his heart has only beat for one woman and it is not her.
She doesn't stir as he removes himself from his mattress and rubs his eyes wearily as he looks around. The Guild is quiet in the pre-dawn light. The other members are sound asleep. The wizard knows that when he leaves them this morning, they will go on without him. He trusts them now and they follow his lead without question. Meredy is comfortable with them too and he knows she will be fine in their presence. It is for this reason that he allows himself the chance to slip away.
Crime Sorcière tracks Dark Guilds, methodically eliminating them while simultaneously seeking information regarding Zeref. But there are lazy days where they are unable to find any traces or trails and instead pool information and meditate. The Underworld has grown quiet, attempting not to draw their gaze.
Jellal gathers his small amount of belongings swiftly and silently, making sure to leave a note explaining his absence before he steps outside from the rough shelter, shielding his eyes from the rising sun.
He still admires the light that bathes him in its soft golden hue and that he has the chance to even consider its existence. For more than fifteen years he did nothing except build a tower and work within the Council, under the control of someone else. Before he was set again on the path of redemption, he had never lived and appreciated the world as it was.
He has a long way to go, he knows. He throws his belongings over his shoulder and crouches low, activating his Meteor spell to cover ground faster than anyone could run.
Between breaks to briefly rest himself, Jellal eats and re-hydrates.
It takes a few hours to reach his destination, but soon he is standing atop a cliff that overlooks the vast city of Magnolia.
Jellal shields his eyes from the midday sun and easily locates the Guild he has come to visit. It towers above the rest of the town, only rivalled in size by the Cathedral.
He reaches for his bag and removes articles of clothing that he has kept for a while now. It takes him a few lengthy minutes to dress himself but he has had practice over the months and soon he is shrouded in navy blue and bandages.
The blue-haired wizard makes no sound as he wanders through the streets of Magnolia, in the direction of the Guild he seeks.
When he arrives, he receives no resistance as he makes his way towards the bar where Mirajane is having a light-hearted argument with her Guild Master. Many mages in the Guild turn and stare at him in wonderment, because all they see before them is the elusive Mystogan. There are few who actually know his real identity and not one of them gives him away.
Mira pauses in her conversation midsentence as she spots him and steps back, almost hesitantly. She is a naturally trusting woman, he knows, and yet he can see in her eyes that she has not quite made up her mind about him.
Master Makarov turns to him so casually that it is as if he hasn't realised who has come to visit. "Mystogan, eh?" He enquires after a brief glance, raising an eyebrow at the shrouded figure before him.
"Master Makarov," Jellal replies, his voice muffled through the cloth. "May I have a word?"
The small Guild Master rubs his chin as he thinks the question over. Eventually he nods and jumps off the top of the bar to land deftly, waving to the cloaked mage to get him to follow. The Guild Hall has fallen silent, and Jellal can feel a hundred eyes on him but he doesn't let that bother him as he follows the elderly wizard into a secluded room.
Makarov closes the door behind him, so their conversation can stay private. "I didn't expect you to show up." The Guild Master admits as he finds himself a seat to sit upon. He scrutinizes the man before him with a watchful eye. "And what has your Guild been up to? Still working?"
They both know that Makarov has intelligence and probably knows the answer to his question. But Jellal decides to answer honestly, explaining some of their methods and Dark Guild activities that might interest the Fairy Tail leader.
Makarov scratches his moustache as he thinks, nodding occasionally at something Jellal says. "Considering the near-collapse of order in the magic world, your Guild has done some hard work to keep Dark Guilds in check. I expected more trouble from them." He tells the blue-haired mage thoughtfully.
Jellal lets out a short laugh. "Really, I think part of it is the official Guilds that are fighting them, yours in particular."
Makarov laughs as well and they fall silent for a few moments.
Jellal has always trusted this man, for whatever reason. Part of it is because he is a man who allows people a second chance and the benefit of the doubt. The other is because he believes he has made orphans like him strong and able to trust again. Even Jellal was not untouched by this man's kindness and his Guild's sense of family and comradery during his time in the Grand Magic Games. Makarov has also never betrayed him since he approached him, asking if he could pretend to be Mystogan to track down potential Dark Guilds.
"What are you here for Jellal?" Makarov asks him bluntly, crossing his arms before him.
Jellal lets out a sigh that is muffled by his clothing. "I need to see her." He admits at length. Silently, he passes forward the letter that he has kept safe from prying eyes.
Makarov takes it and reads it, staring at it longer than necessary, because the note is short and to the point.
"I am aware of these letters," he answers at length.
Jellal is not entirely surprised by this, as he suspected she must have had someone able to find his location as his guild is nomadic.
The Master stays silent for a few minutes before he then asks, "Why now?"
The blue-haired mage bites his lip, although Makarov cannot see. He is nervous, he knows. But he made this decision a month ago and is finally acting on it. "I will repent for my crimes my entire life," he began in a hesitant voice. "But I denied her after your return, before the Magic Games, because I didn't think I was worthy of her."
Makarov makes a disapproving noise at this, but otherwise does not interrupt.
"I thought there would come a time when I would suddenly feel deserving of her, especially after doing something meaningful, like defeating Oración Seis. However I did not. It came later, in the time when I wasn't hunting a Dark Guild. In the quiet times I could reflect and recalled what I was trying to do with my life: to repent, to earn forgiveness. Perhaps she has forgiven me for a long time, but it is only now that I realise it within my own heart. I do not hate myself anymore." The words almost stuck in his throat, but he forced them out. He suddenly felt elated, as if this admission to someone other than himself made everything so real and complete.
I do not hate myself.
It was like a prayer he could hold onto, a slight form of hope; that he was allowed to obtain happiness in his life.
Makarov could see the change in the man's posture and expression before him and nodded in approval. He does not ask the former Council member why he is here to tell him this, because they both know Jellal is doing so as a form of respect towards the Guild Master.
"You've grown up," is all Makarov says in response. He shifts from his spot and points to the door. "She isn't in the Hall; she will be in her dormitory. Go and see her, she will be happy," he explains. It is with these words that they both know he has given him his permission.
Jellal stands and bows before the Guild Master.
"Jellal," Makarov calls just as he reaches for the door handle.
The blue-haired mage turns and blinks in question.
"If ever there comes a time when this is all over; when the Dark Guilds are gone, there is a place for you here. I just want you to know that."
Jellal is stunned, suddenly overcome with warmth and uncertainty. "Thank you, Master Makarov," is all he can muster as he exits the room.
He forces himself to calm down once he is outside. Jellal wonders too if there would come a time when he could become a member of this Guild, free from pursuit and those who sought to kill him. It is a fanciful thought, one he pushes from his mind as he makes his way to Fairy Hills, the dormitory for the female Guild members.
He bumps into Cana along the way. She stops and stares at him in apparent shock.
"You!" She exclaims, pointing with her free hand, while the other reaches for her cards.
Jellal raises his hands in a show of peace. "Wait a second, I've just seen the Master, and he knows I'm here. You can ask him yourself."
Cana settles herself after a few moments. "You startled me, that's all," she tells him in a quiet voice. "You must be here for a reason," she then states bluntly.
He doesn't answer, because they both know why he is there. She knows a bit about his true personality, much more than most people due to his participation in the Magic Games. But he is still a mystery to her and an intimidating one at that.
"Don't do anything to hurt her, or you'll answer to me," she finally announces after an awkward silence. "You got that?"
Jellal nods in acquiesce and they both face off for a few more moments. Finally, Cana seems satisfied and stalks off in the direction of the Guild Hall.
He finds the place easily, as it stands out in the town of Magnolia, set atop a hillside. He knows the room he searches for, because she had once told him where it was and what number, in case he needed to talk. The whole idea had seemed ridiculous to him at the time, since he was a wanted criminal. But that was before the discovery of Edolas and before he learnt that he could disguise himself as Mystogan. Unlike then, he could now walk amongst the Fairies, disguised as one of them.
The blue-haired mage pauses at the door before him, suddenly overcome with self-doubt. However he pushes it to one side, believing in Master Makarov's words: she will be happy.
He holds the note in his hand, carefully opening it to read the words once more.
'It's time to talk.'
This hasn't been her first letter; in fact it is one of many. Every month she stubbornly would send one that magically found its way to him, regardless of where his Guild happened to be. Each time he had convinced himself that a Dark Guild needed to be taken down first, or that he was busy keeping a grip on the new Guild members. But truly his delay in response was because of his own self-doubt. It was true what he had said to Master Makarov, he had reached a point where he no longer felt full of self-loathing and for the first time felt he had the right to pursue his own happiness. So when the latest letter had arrived, he had made the decision to act upon it.
Jellal knocks on the door, gently but loud enough to make a noise. There is no response and no clear sound from inside. Upon a firmer knocking, he discovers that the door is not locked and actually slips open with little force.
Hesitantly, he enters the room, calling out her name.
He can't hear her or sense or presence and wonders whether he should hang around in her lounge room or wait outside. He is unsure of how she would react to finding him in her home without explicit permission. Eventually he decides that loitering around in the hallway of an all-female dormitory would be a worse idea and decides to sit down on her sofa in one of her expansive rooms. He pulls off his mask to allow himself better air and crosses his arms before him.
Jellal isn't left waiting long as he hears the door creak open and she steps into the room.
Her long scarlet-hair for which she is named is tied back in a bun atop her head. With one hand she locks her door while the other grips the towel that covers her still-wet body from her bath. She doesn't notice him until she steps into her foyer and spots him sitting timidly on her sofa.
A heavy blush rises to her cheeks as she meets his gaze.
Jellal quickly looks away out of respect, conscious of keeping his head down as he utters her name.
"Erza."