Enter Jelly
With the shades to his apartment room drawn, L sat down in a rather plush red chair, eyeing the masterpiece which sat before him. His favorite sweet treat; shortcake with whipped cream and a ripe strawberry, set on a small green plate. For a baked good, it was an absolute work of art. Every detail perfect, the placement of the berry exquisitely accentuating the crisp golden buttery cakey goodness, and a small mountain of whipped cream to balance the flavors of the dessert. But that was all beside the point, since L only really loved shortcake because it was delicious.
As he was about to take a bite, something highly unusual caught his attention. There, floating in midair like some gelatinous balloon, was a blue jellyfish. L cocked his head at the creature. What is this? Could it really be a jellyfish? A number of other questions came up. For one, what was it doing there in the first place? And second, how the hell did it get there? L was about 76% sure it was a jellyfish, and not a hallucination from eating too much sugar or a lack of sleep from working on the Kira case. Yes, it was definitely a floating jellyfish.
The spineless creature reached out with a blue tentacle, as if to shake 'hands' with L, but instead wrapped itself around his precious shortcake, yanked it from his grasp, and proceeded to fly lazily away with it. L was completely stunned.
The jellyfish headed towards a large window which overlooked the city. L had pulled the blinds simply so he could enjoy his treat in privacy (he liked an intimate setting when it came to sweets), but now the jellyfish opened them back up. Whether or not the jellyfish actually had a plan for escaping or was just doing random things, since cnidarians have no brains, this act temporarily blinded the confused and sugar-crazed detective. The jelly then closed the blinds, obviously having forgotten that the window would have made an excellent escape route. It proceeded to float towards the front of the apartment.
Once L could see again, he witnessed the thieving jellyfish about to make its getaway with his precious treat through the main entrance. Almost instinctively, he leaped towards the creature and smacked it with the backside of his hand. Both invertebrate and cake flew through the air. L dove to the ground, catching his beloved shortcake whilst the jellyfish smacked into a wall and fell to the carpet. Somehow, it got up unscathed, and rushed back towards L, 'head'-butting him and knocking him off balance. It then caught the goodie and hastily floated again to the door.
Rubbing his forehead, L pulled himself up with the aid of his chair and spun around to meet the jellyfish face-to-foot. Ok, jellyfish don't exactly have faces, but L managed to kick it where a face would have been had it not been a jellyfish. This time the jelly hurtled towards the shade-drawn window, breaking straight through the glass. Luckily, L's cake landed neatly on the floor beneath the window with not a crumb out of place. L felt a mixture of relief and annoyance, and this little skirmish brought up even more questions about the jellyfish he couldn't answer. Sighing, he picked up the plate of cake and took a bite. The sugar calmed him quickly, and soon, sans the strawberry, the cake had been consumed.
L stuck his fork into the plump berry and walked over to the broken window. He should have been wearing shoes or something, since there was a good deal of shattered glass on the floor. However, his shoes were in another room, and L did step carefully to avoid the glass. Nonetheless, it's just not safe to walk barefoot around broken glass. L should know that...he's a genius or something.
Anyway, he reached the window without hurting himself and proceeded to open the shades. Again, he was blinded by the bright light. His vision cleared faster this time, but L quickly wished it hadn't. His strawberry fell to the ground. In a very un-L-like fashion, he muttered the words, "Holy shit".
The entire city was overrun with jellyfish. They were attached to cars and busses, hanging from power lines, and even crossing streets. The creature which had attempted to steal L's cake was just one among millions of jellies now littering the city. As if to add insult to injury, about thirty lavender-colored jellyfish came floating out of nowhere and stuck themselves to the pane. A little disgusted and 100% confuzzled, L pulled the blinds closed.
The Kira case was going to have to wait.
So...
This is a crack-fanfic me and a friend were supposed to write together, but we never got around to it and I had this chapter floating around on my computer for about 2 years. I am finally posting it! New chapters soon to come (hopefully). Review and all that jazz ;)
C. Vincenti