I watched Rukia as she lay in bed, bandages covering her body, dried blood on her pale face, and all I could do was look at her. I did this. It was all my fault, and all I can do now is treat her wounds and wait till she wakes up.

My hollow attacked without warning…again. And it attacked Rukia…again. And all I could do was watch behind the glass as she got tackled, beaten, hurt. Like a defenseless dove.

It was all I fault. And I could do nothing.

I couldn't tell if it was hours or days until she woke up but when she did, we both said nothing for the longest time. Then she broke the silence.

"Ichigo, did it happen again?" she asked. She sounded so weak. It killed me to hear her like that. "Yeah." That was the only thing I could get out; even though there were so many things I wanted to say. Forgive me, I'm weak, I couldn't protect you …I'm sorry. But the only thing I could say was 'yeah' and it made me sound like the biggest ass on the planet.

"Are you okay, Ichigo? Did he hurt you?" How could she asked that? She was nearly killed and she's worrying about me. That idiot. Why should she worry about the problem, the person who did it?

"Rukia, I'm so sorry," I bowed my head, "It's all my fault this happened to you." She looked at me with pity and I couldn't take it. That look in her eyes, pain, sorrow, and the one I hated the most, forgiveness. How could she forgive me? I hurt her so much in so many ways and she's forgiving me. Rukia…

Then her cell phone rang. I got up and brought it to her, she answered. "Hello..…yes, Nii-sama…….no." I saw a look of terror appear on her face. What did that Byakuya say now? "Nii-sama, I don't want to……why…….you can't do this!" Tears started rolling down her pale, beautiful face and it hurt me so much. "……..yes, Nii-sama, I will." She hung up and broke down right in front of me.

I sat next to her on the bed and out my arm around her waist. "What did he say?" She wiped the tears and looked up at me, her violet eyes shimmered in the darkness, "Nii-sama said I had to return to Soul Society…and never come back."

"WHAT?!? WHY DID HE SAY THAT?" Perfect timing Byakuya, just perfect. "He said I must return for my own safety." She paused and looked at the ground. "They know that your Hollow attacked me, they felt the reitsu from there. They said I must go back so I do not get hurt anymore…by you. They said it was for my own good."

They…they can't do this. Take Rukia away because of me…they can't do it. I won't let them. Never.

"YOU'RE NOT GOING!! I WON'T LET YOU! THEY CAN'T DO THIS TO YOU…THEY CAN'T DO THIS TO US!!

"

"BUT WHAT IF THEY'RE RIGHT, ICHIGO!!" she started crying again, "WHAT IF YOU NEVER GAIN CONTROL!"

"YOU'RE NOT GOING! I'M NOT LETTING YOU LEAVE AGAIN!! I WILL! I WILL GAIN CONTROL!!"

"WHEN WILL THAT BE!!? HUH? OR WHAT IF YOU CAN'T!! WHAT IF YOU KILL ME, ICHIGO?!"

That stopped me. Stopped my thoughts. Stopped my movements. I fell to the ground. What if I could do nothing? What if that happened? What if I killed her? What if I killed…Rukia?

With that, for the first time in 6 years, I silently let tears fall from my eyes. I felt weak, useless. Just the thought of me killing her made me…start to cry? Do I care about her that much? Do I really…love her?

Yes. I do.

"I'm sorry," she cried, as she slowly, gracefully flew passed me as fast as she could, passed me, passed the closet, to the window. "NO!" I screamed and grabbed her arm before she jumped out. I wasn't going to let my dove fly away again.

"Please, give me one more chance, Rukia. Don't leave me again," I choked out before I fell to my knees again, begging. And …she didn't leave. She got off the windowsill and ran into my chest. "Okay," she mumbled into my shirt, crying.

And once again, I could do nothing.