hide & seek
(zackxaeris)
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You hide, I seek
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She's looking at the sky, unblinking emerald orbs diving into the blue. The firmament, always so big and grand and flawless, always manages to dazzle her. How could something so huge stretch for milesmilesmiles and miles overhead and have no end? It leaves a hole in her heart. Craves words that she pretends she never understands. Whispers soft truth she wants to let go.
The sky, it's like him. So big she can never turn away and wave it off, forgetting its existence in a blink of an eye. How could she ever forget him? So now, heaving a sigh and gripping her flower basket tightly, she resumes walking and takes a glance at the sky every once in a while, a movement that recently has become her habit.
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Time is up, I seek now
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How long has it been? Almost five years. She stares at her long, slender fingers and wonders if it'll reach six soon. Five good years without any news of him. Five years of smiling (bleeding tears) and laughing (crying out pain) and too big space to call home (smothering her). He said he'd come back. He said with a tone she believed would come out true. He told her to wait, and heck, has she been waiting.
But everyone has their limit, and she has reached hers. She doesn't care if he becomes furious and groans and says that it's for her best that she stays safe, locked away in her church or home, out of any lurking danger. Of black shadows that crawl behind their backs. She really doesn't care; she needs to find him.
But as she trudges her way through the dust covered streets, something tickles her nose. She looks up, just to be greeted by small droplets of—
…rain?
She didn't know when it'd begun to rain. The clouds have changed, have formed a formidable shape of black shadow. There's no crack in the sky, one which she usually tries to spot, just so she can peek behind the refuge, just so she can witness and drown in the blue. But no, all the blues have dispersed, now blocked from sight, shunning away from the eye of the world. Away from her.
Shafts of light forcefully try to break the wall of clouds, but only manage to slip through, tiny cracks of dull light. The sky is wailing. Raindrops plummet ever so freely, too freely, against the rooftop (the sound it creates somehow makes her feel at ease, as if she's finally home), against the cobblestone road, against her body. For a minute longer she lets her rigid shoulders slump, relaxing, feeling nostalgic and tranquil as the cold drops continue to shower everything.
For a moment she sees him. His smile. As bright as the sun, as wide as the sky. A figure that has been missing for years, but still stays in her heart. The colors are beginning to fade.
She opens her eyes. Remembers that the time's up.
The countdown has stopped. She has to move on.
What she's after
(—the sky)
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where are you . . . ?
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She's been searching and waiting. She goes to the Church more often than ever, tending to the flowers that bend more and more nowadays, hoping the doors will creak open and reveal the figure she's been expecting. She tries to concentrate on her flowers, but sometimes she just can't. She always sees black shadows around the corner, she hears voices and screams and warnings. She closes her eyes and sees things she pretends she didn't see.
But still she moves on. She doesn't want to stop hoping. Because it's all she's got; a tiny string of gold that's been stretched and hung before her. It's so thin, so fragile, not promising enough, perhaps—but she doesn't complain. Holding to it, thinking that this is probably a case of life or death. To believe in a glimpse of hope requires big courage; and she squeezes her eyes shut trying to suppress the pain and she prays and asks—
…re…ou?
…where…you…
Where are you?
She can't find him. All she sees are glimpses of the past; his figure sauntering into the Church with a broad grin plastered to his face, his blue eyes reflecting the outside world, his charming yet calming smile that always manages to bring butterflies to her stomach. The shadows always disappear whenever she opens her eyes. And she'll let a tear run down her cheek.
She's tired. She's tired of waiting and searching. She's tired of this game.
The sky steals her attention again.
Today the clouds growl again. She stares at the raindrops. The sky's tears. Some minutes later angry grey wisps of clouds interfere, completely blocking the sky from sight.
(concealed)
(—the last performance)
The sky is falling.
Into pieces.
(—where are you?)
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Gotcha
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The Church is as peaceful as ever. Light streaming through the cracks and windows. No clouds at sight, the sky is more blue than usual, and the sun smiles its brightest smile, a perfect day. A small melody that accompanies the usual chores is then interrupted when something falls and makes quite a noise at the centre of the Church.
She hurries to the bed of flowers, worried and hopeful at the same time.
"Za—"
She later finds out that the guy's name is Cloud.
The Church is still. Her firm footsteps are becoming more and more distant, and only to disappear when the double doors are closed behind her leaving remnants of the past and what ifs and what could have been behind.
I thought I found you then, when I saw him. But when I looked into those eyes, I knew it wasn't you, no matter how much you two were alike. I am now on a real journey. Maybe this game is futile. Maybe trying to go across the world hoping for the truth and some real answers is overrated, but I'm doing it anyways.
Because I think…I'll find you then. So please wait for me.
She stares up at the sky.
I'll be going there soon.
The sky is still.
In the meantime, please watch over me.
The sky is still.
I know you're up there.
The sky seems to answer.
Taking a deep breath, she takes another step that will take her across the world, a journey of salvation, another round of game.
"I'll find you, Zack."
The sky is falling, and the flower is withering
—fin
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a/n: idea was originally from over two years ago,
but I decided to rewrite and make this a Zeris fict.
I think it suits the pairing well so yeah. I haven't written for a long time;
looking at my past ficts makes me want to write again. It's really been a long time
and I think I should consider going back and actually write something again.
edit: this fict got nice hits but so far only one reviewed. If you faved/read this fict
would you also please review? It wouldn't take long;
a line or two would make me really happy.
Thanks a lot for reading. Feedbacks/reviews are very much welcomed! :)