By the time I wake, it's almost dawn. Johanna's still sleeping beside me, her arms still wrapped around me. I roll over to face her, smiling as I can barely make out the outline of her face. She's truly beautiful. And then I catch her lips.. Oh, her sweet, warm lips. And how badly I desire to taste them. And, I do. I slowly lean in, and touch my lips to hers. And at first it's just that, then I work my lips against hers.
And suddenly, she begins to kiss back, and then she slowly opens her eyes. She blinks, once, twice, three times before slightly pulling her lips from mine. "Katniss?" She whispers. I nod once in return. And I see a smile creeping up on her lips.
And that's when I do it again, I taste her lips once more. And this time, she's awake and does just as she did in the closet. After about 2 minutes, we break apart at the same time. And I see that smile still on her lips. "So.. The kiss.. In the closet.. You didn't mind it?" I shake my head, but I feel I need to explain more. "I liked it, actually." And then I mumble quietly, half wanting her to hear and half not wanting her to hear. "I missed your lips." And, she hears. And the smile widens.
"Really?" And suddenly, I'm seeing a whole new side of Johanna. The happy side, the side that actually loves someone. And that someone is me. And it's hard to take in at first. That the girl, who once said there was no one she loved, was in her bed cuddling with me and kissing me. It's hard to take it all in, actually. Me, who flipped out over Peeta on the TV, is now kissing and cuddling with Johanna. But I like it, so I put those thoughts aside and comfort myself with Johanna's lips again.
We kiss on and off, and cuddle until the sun rises. And even then, we stay in bed for a while until it's demanded that we go to training. But I can't focus on training today, not with the feel of Johanna's lips still lingering on mine. So I request a day off, and immediately am granted it, same as Johanna. We say we just wanna visit people today and relax. But we don't get any of that achieved. Except for the relaxing part.
We stay in our room all day, the door locked in fear that someone might walk in on us. We promised to keep us a secret. And most of the day we spend on the comfortable couch provided, one of the only luxuries of District 13. We cuddle all day, and kiss on and off just as earlier.
And then I get tired. I only slept about 3-4 hours last night, and the training already has me exhausted. So I curl up next to Johanna in my bed, and fall asleep. I'm out until dark, and awaken to Johanna asleep next to me. I roll over in her arms, facing her, and I smile at her sleeping face. I just admire her beauty for a little while, and then she slowly wakes up, just as this morning. She smiles over at me, and we kiss again. Her lips seem a little rougher than earlier, and she doesn't have chapstick on so the chap-ness of her lips is intensified. But I don't care. Her lips are familiar to me now, and they still provide that warmth.
And then something new happens, Johanna rolls on top of me and straddles me. And then I'm worried, almost, that she wants sex. And she must see that register on my face, because she kisses me, mumbling reassurance on my lips. She tells me she won't do anything I don't want to.
And then I almost say I do want to, but I can't. I'm still only 17, and Johanna, around 25. And while I do love the kisses, I don't want this step yet. And besides.. I'm not even sure how you do.. It. But after a couple more minutes of kissing, she rolls off me and we just lay there for a while. Until we think it's late, and we should get to bed. Because, tomorrow's normal. We have training. So we curl up again and sleep.