Passing the Time

Starlite: Warning! This is NOT a serious fic and is nearly 100 humor! Those with no sense of humor should back away now! I DON'T OWN ANYTHING AND NEVER WILL SO STOP BOTHERING ME!!!! Also all the words in italic are things that he is saying in his head and there is very small hints of shonen-ai if you look hard enough. ALWAYS REVIEW!!

Itsuki was sitting in his boat surrounded by candles. He was all alone because Sensui had left the cave to tend to business in the human world.

I really should be concentrating, but it's just so...boring. Maybe Shinobu won't mind if I lost my train of thought for just a few minutes...NO! I must keep my concentration! Hmmm, maybe it's time for a song.

"Every night in my dreams
I see you. I feel you.
That is how I know you go on."

The demons on the other side of the barrier groaned as they heard him sing. It really wasn't that bad, but they just didn't like being sung to.

Okay! Quite enough of that! Maybe a game! Yes, a game to pass the time! I know! I can play fetch with Uraotoko and my extra arms. Nah. That could get noisy...Hmmm, there has got to be something I can do to pass the time without being too loud......................................Aha! I can...No I can't do that. Maybe I could...No that's too complicated. I got it! I can sit here and try to make up words to confuse anyone (or myself) who dares to try to get the best of me! Mwahahahaha!!! Hmmm, what would be a good word for "I'M INSANELY BORED AND NEED TO GET A LIFE!!!!" Maybe ibantgal..Yes, this is proof that my life is going down the tubes. IBANTGAL! (sigh) Alas, the things some people do for love...

After 3 hours of talking to himself and making up strange words...

Argh! I hate this! He said he would only be gone for a few hours! NOT 6! DOES HE EVEN REALISE HOW HARD IT IS TO SIT HERE ALL BY YOURSELF AND TRY TO OPEN A PORTAL THAT WILL ALLOW POWERFUL DEMONS TO DESTROY THE WORLD!?!?! NO! BECAUSE ALL HE EVER DOES IS GO TO THE HUMAN WORLD TO TORMENT THE OTHER PSYCHICS AND YUSUKE URAMESHI! AND WHEN HE'S NOT DOING THAT, HE'S WATCTING THE CHAPTER BLACK VIDEO THAT STARTED THIS WHOLE THING IN THE FIRST PLACE!!! ON TOP OF ALL THAT STUFF, IF WE CAN'T FIND THE PSYCHIC TO CUT THE KEKKAI BARRIER NET ALL THIS WORK WILL BE FOR NOTHING ACCEPT TO ALLOW LOWER CLASS DEMONS TO PASS THROUGH!!!!! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

5 minutes later...

Okay. I'm calm. I've done my deep breathing exercises and I've counted to ten. This isn't Shinobu's fault. This is the human race's fault. I was put in this world to create this portal thingy. This stupid portal is my life. It is my job. It is also......THE BIGGEST PAIN IN THE ASS EVER!!!! BPITAE!!! 10. 9. 8. 7. 6. 5. 4. 3. 2. 1. (deep breath) I'm alright now. I can't be mad about this. This is supposed to be for the better good. But I still can't help but think that I could have a better job than sitting on a boat waiting for a human to come back because I have nothing better to do. I could have gone to college like y mother always wanted, but NO! I had to get involved with a human and become part of a plot to destroy life on Earth as we know it. I could have made something of myself! I could have fulfilled my dreams and became an author of a picture book for blind children!

"And why can't I think of a word for "Will Shinobu ever pay me for the work I do?" Itsuki accidentally said outloud.

"No." Sensui simply stated from behind Itsuki's boat.

"Ah! Shinobu, when did you get here?" Itsuki was sweating bullets.

"Oh, about fifteen minutes ago."

"Why didn't you tell me you were here?"

"I wanted to see how long you were going to talk to yourself before you realized that I was here. And what's this non-sense about a picture book for blind children?"

"Nothing sir. Just a stupid thought."

"Ah. Anyway, how is it coming along?"

"Ibantgal." Itsuki forgot about his language that he was growing accustomed to.

"Remind me to never to leave you alone anymore."

Starlite: How did you like it? I was in one of my happy happy moods and felt like tormenting Itsuki today. YOU HAVE TO REVIEW!! IT IS YOUR PURPOSE IN LIFE BECAUSE IBANTGAL!!!