Well, apparently, this fic got taken off. Not sure why though.

Flt. Sk.: "Because it sucks."

Ivan: "Actually, I kinda like it. Those tall bozos got nothing on me."

By the way, Ivan has become my newest muse in my other fic. I've made changes to Pointless Arguments, but it's basically the same.

Flt. Sk: "Floating Skull hates you for reposting this."

Oh well. Hey, Ivan, wanna do your first ever disclaimer?

Ivan: "Would I?!!" (clears throat) "DragonRaiderX9 does not own Golden Sun."

Flt. Sk.: "Floating Skuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuull!!!"

-

It was a cold, bitter day in the northern town of Prox. We join two young warriors, or at least I'm assuming they're young, who are attempting to settle a conflict. Let us join their intelligent conversation. Well, at least as intelligent as you're gonna get in Prox.

"Come on, Agatio," said the one with curved hair.

"No, raiding Mt. Aleph was your job, Saturos," said the straight haired one.

"Aw, me and Menardi raided it last time. All of our men died, and all we had to show for it were some hostages. That kid is starting to bug me."

"You mean Felix?" asked Agatio.

"Yeah," grunted Saturos. "He eats too much, is always getting into trouble. And at night, he shouts in his sleep about his sister."

Agatio looked perplexed. "Why does he sleep in your house?"

Saturos sighed. "Remember when we first brought him here?"

"Yeah,"

"Well, it seems he was bothering the other hostages. Apparently, he had a sound proof room back in Vale. The hostages complained too much, so we all draw straws annually to see where he'll stay."

Agatio brightened, "Oh, I remember now. You've lost three years in a row."

Saturos darkened, "Yeah, I'm starting to think it's being rigged."

Agatio closed his eyes as if he was thinking. What he was really doing, we may never know. Suddenly, his eyes flew open. "I've just realized something!"

Saturos sighed and rolled eyes. "What?"

Agatio grinned with glee. "Earlier, it said I brightened while you darkened."

"So?"

Agatio looked frustrated, "It's a reference to the two elements that were never used in Golden Sun; light and darkness. Do you think it's a sign?"

Saturos sighed again, "No, it's just the author's stupidity. Anyway, back to the point, you're going to raid the Sol Sanctum."

Agatio glared, "No, I can't leave yet. I haven't even told Karst how feel about her yet."

Saturos eyes opened in shock, "What do you mean? How do you feel about her?"

"Well, to be honest," said Agatio. "Kinda queasy..."

Saturos falls down anime style, then stands up. "...Ewwwwwww, kinky. Anyway, why don't you just take her with you? Proxians always travel in pairs."

"I don't wanna, you and Menardi go!" cried Agatio. Then he cheers up. "Hey, I know, how about the four of us go to see the world's largest slice of cheese in Alhafra?"

"That's stupid, let's fire dwarves out of the cannon in Loho," said Saturos.

"Wait, I've got it!" exclaimed Agatio. "Let's kick Shamans in the crotch and see how high their voices get."

Saturos grinned. "Good idea, but let's do it in Contigo."

"Shaman!" screamed Agatio.

"Contigo!" yelled Saturos.

"Shaman!!"

"Contigo!!"

"SHAMAN!!!"

"CONTIGO!!!"

Then, for no apparent, nor obvious reason, Menardi walks by. Saturos gets an idea.

"Hey, Agatio. Let's flip Menardi for it. If she lands on her face, we'll go to Shaman Village. If she lands on her back, we'll go to Contigo."

Agatio grinned from ear to ear. "Heehee, sounds like a plan." The two go running towards Menardi.

-Meanwhile, in Alhafra-

The Mayor was enjoying his morning newspaper in the top floor of his watchtower. He continued peacefully until something caught his eye out the northwest window.

The Mayor frowned. "Are those fireworks?" Suddenly, a large fireball lands in the village.

The Mayor screamed. "AHHHHH!!! MY CHEESE!!!!!!!"

-End Chapter 1-

Well, that chapter's over.

Flt. Sk.: "It was even worse than the first time."

Ivan: "I really enjoyed it. I always knew Saturos was stupid. Especially cuz he tried to fight me, the mighty Ivan!"

Yeah, whatever shorty

Ivan: "SHORTY?!! No one calls me shorty! SPARK PLASMA!!!!!!!!!"

DRX9 and Flt. Sk.: "AIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!" (faint)

Ivan: "Oh dear, I think I killed them. Oh well, I guess I'll have to post the next chapter"