Authoress's Note: Well, I'm so glad to finally get this posted! I wrote it back in August, but it only seemed logical to post it in the Christmas season. I hope you enjoy it, as usual I am happy to receive Constructive Criticism, and any comments.

Disclaimer: Sure I own the Jellicles. Didn't you hear how Hannah recently took over the world with the aid of Chewbacca and the mighty cheese monsters from Outer space!

...or not. .:sighs:.

A Jellicle Christmas Carol

Chapter One

"'Ey, Munkus!" a petite tiger-striped queen and her taller male counterpart made their way over the snow-covered chain-link fence, into the lot dubbed, 'The Jellicle Junkyard' by its inhabitants. Rumpelteazer grinned at the tall silver tabby standing next to the fence, presumably overseeing the cats of the Junkyard.

"Rumpel! Long time no see! And Mungojerrie, too!" Munkustrap helped Rumpelteazer down and waved to Mungojerrie, who gave him a quick salute. "Where have you two rogues been?"

"Rogues. I loike tha'." Replied Mungojerrie, laughing. He gestured with a paw. "We've been 'ere an' there."

"Ou' and abou'." Said Rumpelteazer, nodding in agreement. "And 'ow've ye been lately?"

"Oh, quite well." Said Munkustrap. "The humans are always more agreeable in the winter holiday, I've noticed. Haven't scolded me for exercising my claws on the cushins, lately." He laughed. Receiving a surprised look from Mungojerrie, he added, "Well, sometimes I can't help myself, you know…"

"Ah know. Jus' didn't realise tha' you, of all cats, clawed furniture…don' seem like you! Not all….Jellicle Protector-ish!" he replied, for lack of a better adjective than "protector-ish".

"Oh, stop it!" replied Munkustrap, but jokingly. He shook his head. "Well, I'm glad you're both back from…wherever." he shrugged. "Just in time for Christmas. Oh, which reminds me: Merry Christmas Eve!"

"Same to ye." Chorused the tiger cats.

Rumpelteazer scratched her head. "Ye know," she said suddenly, "Why do we recognize Christmas?" she asked. "I know it's a holiday…but ah nevah really un'erstood the 'ole meanin'…" Munkustrap had opened his mouth to reply when, suddenly, a small blur of white, orange, and brown fur whizzed over to them and threw itself at Rumpelteazer, nearly knocking her off her feet. "Whoa…watch it, Etcy!" she panted, eyes wide. Etcetera grinned up at her older sister.

"Rumpel!" she screamed happily. "You're here!"

"Etcetera!" Rumpelteazer screamed back. "You're here!"

Etcetera rolled her eyes at her sister. "Why wouldn't I be here?" she said.

"An' why wouldn' I be 'ere, either, fer Christmastime?" pouted Rumpelteazer. "Y'really think I'm tha' dumb, tha' I'd fergit ye all and jus' run off?"

"Yup."

"Oh, thanks." Muttered Rumpel sullenly. "Ah'm so unappreciated!" she put her hand over her eyes and pretended to sob dramatically. Mungojerrie and Munkustrap just looked at each other and shook their heads simultaneously. You couldn't really understand how strange Rumpelteazer truly was until you knew her so well that you wished you didn't know her that well. Confusing, eh?

Suddenly Etcetera glanced past Rumpelteazer, and a half-demonic grin lit up her kitten features. "Oh no." moaned Mungojerrie.

"Tugsyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!" with a squeal, Etcetera disappeared in a blur of fur. Mungojerrie and Rumpelteazer snickered rudely.

"Are you sure an obsession like that isn't unhealthy?" said Mungojerrie, half-jokingly.

Rumpelteazer shrugged. "Etcy's already sick in the head."

"That's such a terrible thing to say!" exclaimed Munkustrap. "It's not as if she's...oh, depraved, or anything." This only sent the striped Jellicles into another bout of guffaws.

"We don' exactly know tha..." replied Rumpelteazer, laughing hysterically. Munkus gave her the 'I-don't-see-why-it's-so-funny' look that could beat that of any schoolteacher. She shrugged at him, then appeared to calm herself. "But," she said, more seriously, "As ah was sayin', 'fore Etcy made 'er...dramatic entrance," she looked down at her paws as though she was embarrassed, "Well...I was wonderin'...about Christmas, y'know, Munk?" she looked eagerly at him. "Ah know we celebrate it, but, it don't seem like anyone ever told me why. It's jus', somethin' you do, y'know? Do you know?"

"Of course!" replied Munkustrap, without thinking. "Sorry, I didn't mean to sound rude. But, come to think of it, I don't think that most of the younger cats in the tribe have heard the Christmas story, Rumpelteazer. I never really thought about it before."

"Story?" said Mungojerrie and Rumpelteazer in unison, excited grins spreading over their faces. Munkustrap couldn't help but smile.

"Yeah. It's very important to the humans." he said. "It's one of the central ideas of their religion, or at least a lot of the humans' religion."

"If there's a story..." said Mungojerrie suddenly. Rumpel appeared to get the same idea as her partner. Her eyes sparkled as she grasped Munkustrap's paw.

"You kin tell us!" she exclaimed. "Jus' like you tell about th' Pekes an' Pollicles!" she giggled like a kitten. "Yer good at that stuff."

"Well..." said Munkustrap cautiously. The Christmas story wasn't exactly like 'The Awefull Battle of the Pekes and the Pollicles', but...maybe Teazer had a point. He chuckled to himself, then nodded to the 'notorious cats'. He smiled. "Yes. I'll tell the story to the tribe."

The same identical grins spread over Mungo and Teazer's faces. Mungojerrie gave his salute to the tall silver tabby. "An' if ye need anybody to act out any parts, we're always roight here fer ya!" he said. Munkustrap grinned.

"Thanks, but I think I'll be okay." he replied. Rumpelteazer rolled her eyes again and she and Mungojerrie grinned good-naturedly. Munkustrap looked around, and shivered as a cold wintry wind blew over them. He looked at the sky; it was beginning to darken, as the fiery, orange sun sank beneath the treetops and buildings. Then he looked back at the cats. "Suppose I should see if we can get the tribe together?" he said.

"Yes. Tell them it's real importan' so they listen to ya!" said Rumpelteazer; Munkustrap nodded faux-seriously and turned to the rest of the tribe.

" Could I have everybody at the tire?"

Chatter ceased abruptly as the older queens and toms herded the kittens over to the traditional Jellicle gathering spot. Munkustrap looked round and smiled, nodding to some and gazing tenderly at his mate, Demeter. She spotted him and waved, her shy smile creeping onto her lips. Munkus gave her a last glance and looked over the assembled Tribe again. "Has anybody seen Old Deuteronomy to-day?" he inquired.

"I have naae seen him 'round te-day, lad, but he'll join us soon enough, eh?" said Skimbleshanks. "Jest saving his appearance for later."

"Yes, you are more than likely right." Munkustrap agreed. "But, I suppose I should tell you why I called you to assemble now." The Jellicles quieted again, and Munkustrap saw Victoria nudge Mr. Mistoffelees, who had been staring hypnotically at a shiny pink light bulb, which presumably had come off a string intended for a Christmas tree decoration. "Somebody…" he paused and smiled, "Asked me about Christmas. Why we commemorate it." He heard Mungojerrie whisper something, which was responded to by a familiar giggle. "So I agreed to tell the Christmas story…maybe some of you know it, perhaps you have no idea what it is. Either way, I hope you will hear me out as I tell you of it."

Now the Kittens were beginning to look interested, and the adults were smiling-probably reminiscing about special Christmases. Munkustrap continued:

"I had hoped Old Deuteronomy would be here to join us in the telling of this tale-it would probably make a lovely change from the 'Pekes and the Pollicles' and 'Growltiger'…" this was greeted with ascensions and snickers "But, I'm, er, relatively sure that he will arrive in due time." He smiled nervously at the congregation.

"Although due time could mean anything from 10 minutes to 10 years…" mumbled Tumblebrutus, but he was silenced with a evil look from Jellylorum and a typical Jellylorum reprimand. Munkustrap paused politely, waiting for everybody to quiet down, until the tribe once again sat quietly, waiting for him to continue. The silver tabby smiled again.

"Anyhow, we're gathering together for a telling of the Christmas story!" Munkustrap finally finished, with some considerable relief.

"What's it about?" a voice from the tribe yelled out; Pouncival-go figure.

Munkustrap let his head drop into his paws, then finally looked back up. "Pounce," he muttered, "What do you think it's about?"

"Oooh, I know-Christmas!"

"Good job." Replied Munkus. "Now, anyways…this story- The Christmas Story- starts out a long time ago, back in a place called Nazareth, with a lady named Mary, and her husband, Joseph…"

A/N: Well, that's chapter one. I hope it isn't too short. I was planning to post this whole story on Christmas Eve, but I decided to spread it out and post the chapters at different times. So yah. We-ell then…reviews pweese? Jemima eyes

Le gra go deo,

Eponine