Snape's Bi-curious Adventure
"Albus?" Snape called through the corrider, seeing the bearded headmaster stride swiftly down it, "Can I get you to check something quickly?"
Dumbledore paused outside the potions master's room. "Certainly Severus, what is it?"
"Well, I was mixing some truffle odour with some powdered skunk breath in my cauldron, and realised there was still some love potion fermenting at the bottom of it. I was pondering the circumstances of this new potion combination and wished to record my results but, well, as you know, I have an embarrassing habit of not seeing colours properly and was wondering if you could quickly verify the results?"
"Of course" Albus said; Snape's colour blindness was well known and had resulted in much hilarity in the staff common room.
"It appears to be a violent shade of purple" Dumbledore said, after coming in and closing the door behind them, "What would that entail, in your professional opinion?"
"From the base of the compound and this new knowledge of the colour, I presume its some kind of- Oh no..." Snape quickly covered his face with his robe sleeve and rushed to the door. "Dammit, it automatically locks and the keys on the outside! Albus quickly you need to..."
Snape lost track of what he was saying. Something about Dumbledore's piercing blue gaze seemed... More piercing, more blue. Like the ferocity of great ocean distilled into a small bottle on a quiet summers day.
"Why Snape..." said Albus "Your hair its so... Dashing."
Snape blushed. He looked down. And gasped. Albus' robes, thick as they were, had trouble concealing the large erection within. Severus shuddered. At first, he was aghast by the thought of Dumbledore having a huge chorizo, swinging like a pendulum beneath his wizardly hips, but then... Further ponderance on how it would feel, the smooth, yet marbled texture of this veiny meat in his hands, changed his shudder of disgust to a strange new shudder. One of forbidden pleasure, that came to be suppressed, only to come again and again, each time rearing its sweat inducing orgasmic pleasure stronger and stronger.
Snape shook himself out of it. He realised with a start that he too had an erection, but how small in comparison! He turned away in embarassment.
"Whats wrong Severus?" Dumbledore crooned, his voice loosing that age-old wisdom and taking on a childlike, husky delighted tone.
"Nothing sir, its just... No. Nothing." He had a special vial for emergencies like this, in his right hand pocket was a penis-enlargement formula. Or was it his left hand? No, that was the breast-augmentation one? Wasn't it? He drew them both out, the penis one was green, the breast one was brown. Damn. Blast his colour blindness. He swallowed both. With his penis enlarging, and breasts augmenting, he swung back round to face the old man, smiling as he felt the increased weight under him and the extra force of the breasts when he spun round.
"Sir? I like it when you call me that. Ssseverus."
"Well then, sir," said Severus with a cheeky smile and a raised eyebrow "I suppose I shall have to serve you as a true servant would..."
2 hours later the maintenance house-elves finally managed to unlock the door and get in, to find the headmaster and potions master naked on the floor, riddled in red slap marks and covered in a sticky red potion that smelt of rasberries, mixed with traces of a curious white, sterile one, locked into a tight embrace on the floor, fast asleep. Naturally, no-one ever spoke about this. But the house elves knew.