Ashfur: *whining* do i have to?

Author: yea, you do. just get it over with, whimp

Ashfur: Fine! XxXxstarfirexXxX does not own the warriors books or the cats, or TDWT, or blah blah blah you get the idea. she doesnt own anything but her stories and her pants. *starfire glares at ashfur evily*. This is fan fiction so she can make me do stuff though... *suddenly a random tutu appears on his waste and pants on his head and he walks into firestars den screaming IMMA PRETTY FAIRY AND I LOVE YOU! and is chased away from camp by sandstorm where does the same thing to leopardstar, and then Onestar, and then Blackstar...* *comes back into room panting* i hate u.

author: good for you!

*leafpool randomly walks in, high on catnip*: DAD! DAD! LEAFKIT ISNT ME! IMMA GURL HES A GUY!

Icekit walked out of the Earthclan nursery for the first time in her life. Blinking, she would have never imagined the outside would look like this. The pond in the middle of the camp was frozen over in the cold of leafbare, making a perfect play spot for Poppyfur's kits, Forestkit and Leafkit, to play tag. They would run at each other until there paws would slip and they couldn't stop. One time Forestkit flew right off into her brother, Leafkit, and they tumbled so far off the pool that they crashed into some frost-covered bracken.

"Hey guys!" Icekit yelled. "Can i join you?"

"Sure, why not?" Forestkit called back.

Leafkit just sat and stared at Icekit. Secretly, she had always had a crush on him, but she knew she was probably just another kit to him. But why was he staring at her?

Suddenly Cris from total drama world tour walks in screaming "DIE LITTLE KITTIES!" holding a bazooka but hes attacked by like a billion cats and then sat on by owen, who farts and cris chokes to death, and then they both dissappear.

"Well, that was surprising," said Frostymoon, a beautiful silver warrior. "I thought he might actually kill us that time." (o.O)

"Yea, i cant believe he had owen sit on him!" called heatherflight, the medicine cat. "I've already just had one cat die from choking on the toxic gasses from his butt!"

Then Rowanfur walked up to Heatherflight with a cackling cat no one recognized. "Any idea who this is? I think hes having a different type of reactionto Owens butt fumes..."

"He's probably a rouge cat trying to sneak into our camp. Let him laugh till his heart explodes. If hes still alive by sun high, tell me. I'll use my epic medicine cat powers to wipe his memories of hating the clans and make him one of us."

*FAST FWD TO SUNHIGH-*

Heatherflight stood over the cat (we're gonna call him randomzombiecat now) repeating the same creepy words: "join us. resistence is futile. join us. join us. there is no resistence. join us."

"Maybe i dont wanna!" Randombrainscat screamed. "DIE!" he screamed, biting into his own fur. "OW! STOP HURTING ME YOU JERK!"

"yea, stop." a random voice from nowhere said.

Icekit gasped. Standing there was Bloodstar, leader of Vampyreclan.

He walked up to randomzombiecat and said "This won't hurt a bit. you'll just die!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Randomzombiecat's cry was cut off by a gurgle as Bloodstar bit into his fur and sucked his blood, turning into robert pattinson as edward from twilight.

A/N: Im not making fun of twilight. its just fun to add him into stories! ;3

"DIE!" another random voice called, as jacob ran in and ate edward and skipped happily away with bella, who randomly appeared out of no where.

"oooooookay..." Starkit, icekit's sister said.

icekit: o.O