Happy Tree Friends in…
Cane of Construction
This week featuring: Nutty, Lifty, Shifty, and Handy
With special guest appearances by Lumpy.
A/N: Ironically, the day when Mondomedia makes another Happy Tree Friends episode, I suddenly get the idea for a fanfic. How cool is that?
Warning: This fanfic contains lots of violence…well duh. Of course it has violence; it is based on Happy Tree Friends after all.
Nutty was walking down the street licking a gigantic lollipop he bought from the candy store. He suddenly decided to chomp down on the whole thing and swallowed it all. Nutty got a sugar rush and started to shake like crazy and laugh like an idiot. Unfortunately, he also shook all the candy from his fur until he was completely sugar-less. Too bad Nutty didn't know that every sugar rush doesn't last long (or in Nutty's case, even five seconds). Nutty stopped shaking and laughing and groaned depressingly, longing for more candy.
He turned around and gasped with joy, giggling at the same time. He saw a humongous candy cane perched right on top of a skyscraper that was currently under construction. He quickly jetted to the construction building and gazed at the giant candy cane on the roof.
"OOOOOHHH!!" he said in awe.
Nutty giggled and stepped inside a construction elevator, pushing the green button. Although, Nutty thought the button was a green gumball, so when he was halfway up the building, he tried to grab the green button. Nutty grumbled and started jabbing at the button until he got so angry that he simply twisted it off, breaking the elevator. Nutty was only halfway through the building, upset and jittery. He wanted to lick the candy cane so badly, and he was going to do anything to get it.
Elsewhere, Lifty and Shifty were running through the building with several treasures and expensive knick-knacks in their hands, laughing mischievously. The two of them turned around and checked to see if anyone was chasing them. No one was and they started to laugh in the same way again.
"YEAH!" they shouted, high-fiving each other.
Lifty pushed the red button in order for the elevator to go down…but nothing happened. Nutty had broken the elevator earlier and now it was rendered inoperable. Lifty started pounding on the button with both of his fists until the button popped out and impaled him in the eye. Lifty screamed horribly and began to run around like an idiot, holding his bleeding eye. Shifty dropped his treasures and rushed to his wounded brother, trying to figure out what he should do.
Handy accidentally started a fire near one of the support beams and he needed to contain it quickly. He tried to grab the water hose from the side of a wall, but he suddenly realized something very important:
HE HAD NO HANDS!!
So Handy decided to head butt the glass box, getting many shards in his face and mouth. Handy groggily grabbed the hose with his teeth and turned the knob with his tongue, edging it forward until the red handle pushed forward. Handy started screaming when the hose started flailing about all over the place, swinging his body as well. Normally, he'd spit the hose out, but he was jerking around so much that he could go flying out the building and end up falling several feet to the ground. The power of the water was enough to blast a hole through a wooden car too, so he still might die even if he didn't fly away.
Shifty was holding a crying Lifty, trying to get him to some form of safety. They suddenly saw Handy screaming and jerking around the floor like a balloon deflating, wondering what was happening. Suddenly, the hose blasted the both of them in separate directions: Lifty was sent flying off the building floor and Shifty was thrusted halfway through the wooden elevator doors.
"EEEEEEEEEEHHH!!!" screamed Lifty as he fell several hundred feet to the ground.
Lifty's body made a loud hollow gong sound; he had fallen inside a metal trash dumpster. Lifty somehow managed to survive the fall and slowly woke up, looking up into the sky. Lifty suddenly groaned when he realized his arm was resting in yellow trash water. But then…something weird happened…the walls were moving towards him.
"Huh?"
Lifty whimpered and looked left and right, realizing the walls were getting closer by the second. Lifty wasn't inside a dumpster at all. He was inside a dumpster truck, ready to squish the garbage into nothing.
"AHHH--AHH--AHHHHHH!!! AAAAAAHHHHHH!! AAHH--"
Before Lifty could finish screaming, the walls squished his body into nothingness, spreading his blood and organs all around the back of the garbage truck. Shifty was also awake, realizing that several wood shavings were stuck inside his head. But he was too tired and groggy to care.
Meanwhile, the hose was getting extremely out of control, dousing everything with water and breaking some of the support beams. If that wasn't bad enough, the hose sprayed water all over the emergency generator, which made the elevator come to life.
"Huh?" muttered Shifty.
The elevator made a loud mechanical noise and it skyrocketed to the top of the building. Shifty managed to shriek before half of his body was severed in half by one of the support beams. Too bad. If his head and torso weren't outside of the elevator, he'd still be intact.
Elsewhere…Nutty had finally reached the top of the building, gazing at the giant candy cane. He giggled like crazy and walked over to the cane, licking his lips with foam coming out of his mouth. Right when he was about to bite down, the whole building began to collapse; Handy inadvertently broke most of the support beams with the hose. After all the clattering and clanging had stopped, Nutty had hit the ground and was resting right next to the candy cane…completely unscathed. He screamed and felt around his body just in case he had some blunt object sticking into his brain. But he sighed with relief and glanced at the candy cane again.
Handy wasn't so lucky however, because he was crushed by the weight of all the metal bars and wooden floors. But…at least Nutty got what he wanted. Nutty giggled again and bit down into the cane, abruptly spitting out the chuck he took out of it, groaning and whining. The candy cane was nothing more than wood carved so that it was shaped like a candy cane. Nutty started pounding his fists on the ground and was running in circles, screaming like crazy. He wanted to get another sugar rush so badly he didn't know what to do. Nutty, in a psychotic state, started ravaging the wooden candy cane with his teeth. He tried replacing the taste of dry, painted wood with a sweet and succulent candy cane. But that wasn't a good idea because the cane was supporting a large metal beam aimed right for the back of Nutty's head. Nutty laughed wildly just before he gargled when the bar slammed right through his skull from the back. Normally, the bar would be sticking through his mouth, but instead, half of his skull cracked and was thrusted out of his mouth. His whole set of teeth erupted out of his mouth and fell on the street.
Meanwhile, Lumpy appeared holding his mouth in pain; it was completely charred and bloody. What happened? Well…combine the words "fireworks" and "juggling" and you'll figure it out.
…Anyway, Lumpy stumbled upon the teeth and looked at them, realizing they were just his size. He picked them up and slid Nutty's teeth into his mouth, smiling widely. Sure, it was disgusting and totally wrong of Lumpy to put a dead squirrel's teeth into his mouth, but he didn't care. He didn't even notice the wreckage and dead animals that lay right next to him.
Lumpy walked away into the sunset, whistling casually to himself.