I posted this on the Callie_Arizona livejournal as well (under the same username), I brought it over here because I thought you readers might enjoy it as well :)

Author : pgirl202

Title : If There Was No You (1/?)

Pairing : Callie/Arizona

Rating : R for language (eventually)

Summary : Callie and Arizona spent the past year together, but end their romance due to trust issues from both women. They still love each other and remain friendly. Will they get back together and have their love prove the test of time? Chapters will switch between Arizona and Callie's POV.

Maybe I need you,

Here in this hotel room

Thinking about angels

Thinking about what they do

Maybe they'll fly you

Bring you right here to me

Cover the miles

Cause heaven knows what I need

Maybe I need you

I fight for what I love. I fight for what is right, for what is fair. I fight for hope, for dreams, for sleep. Mainly, I fight for you. It's something I will never stop doing. Alone in the bed that once occupied the two of us, my mind races over how much we meant to me, how much you meant to me. In the apartment I share with an obnoxiously loud roommate, I miss the stillness of your breathing. How your hair danced upon your skin. God I miss the softness of your skin, the smell of your shampoo.

My heart still skips a beat when I see you walk through the halls of Seattle Grace, my breath gets caught up in my throat when you smile or laugh that raspy laugh of yours – that's something I'll never tell you, how much I need you. I can't form the right words to say, "I need you" doesn't seem like it justifies how I'm feeling, "I cant stop thinking about us" doesn't sound good enough, "I am such a moron for letting you go", "You are all I ever needed", "I am still in love with you. You are my heart, my soul." All the words I should be saying to you can never seem to shoot past my lips. So I'm stuck thinking them, I'm stuck feeling the emotions of a heartbroken teenager who just ended their first love. The first date we had, the last date we had and all the nights in between them flood my brain like they are happening all over again. They should be happening all over again.

Do you know I sometimes sleep in the sweatshirt you left? Three months have passed since we ended our relationship, the scent of your perfume is fading from your pillow, like a distant memory. I miss the scent - it was surprising coming from you. Sweet, flowery, very girly for a self-proclaimed bad ass Ortho surgeon like yourself. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you.

My shift tonight at the hospital was long and tiring. I was going on almost twenty-four hours of non-stop work, and all I wanted to do was crawl into bed and sleep in tomorrow. I had five back-to-back surgeries, ranging from a six year old girl with a liver transplant, to Daniel, a ten year old boy fighting his battle with cancer. Luckily for me, they all pulled through to live another day, which was rare, usually we have one or two that do not make it. That's the part that always kills me, having to tell the parents that their little boy or girl didn't make it and that I tried my best. This would be the part of the day that I'd be sharing with you Calliope, so you could see the accomplishment written all over my face.

I head back to the small apartment, dropping my bag, keys, and jacket in the right spots as I enter the living room. I fix a sandwich, flipping on the television for something to watch since I can't seem to fall asleep just yet. Two hours later, I find myself rubbing my eyes feeling the effects of staying up finally slipping in. Settling in bed, I am off to dream about the future we should be having. I stare at the empty spot next to me where you should be lying right now. I really hope that I will find the strength to tell you I need you because I'm not sure how many more days and nights I can keep living without you.