Everyone says that being alone is the hardest thing to do, but for Severus it's the knowing that he's the reason that, ultimatly, he is alone. He pushes them away, and says he doesn't like relationships. But Severus doesn't fear them in themselves, he fears what they'll take from him when they finally leave. The person he'd become. "My hearts like glass, without the opacity. My body is like love without the affection. I furl into myself at nights and drain myself of saddness." Severus wrote on an empty parchment. He wasn't much for poetry but when it comes easily, you go for it.

The nights are the worst, definatly. The phone doesn't ring in the night, that's the hardest. It's just silent and lonely. You await the ringing but it never comes. So you take the phone off the hook and pretend thats the reason nobody calls. Severus had lived in London his entire life. Spinner's End was the closest thing to home he could ever feel, but the industrial city in northern England wasn't exactly comforting. At least in the long run. His house was at the end of an old dirt road that nobody went down, and he was so far away everything that its a wonder people don't know why he's so skinny. The trees covered everything like a forest, and the other houses were all abandoned. Another area of lonely not being covered.

Severus has an hour and 15 minutes to get on the Hogwarts train and a week before classes started. He could feel the look on the first years faces already when he stepped inside the classroom, waving a hand to close the curtains, stopping at the front behind a tall wooden desk and telling them to open their books and be quiet.

"You listen, I speak. Thats how you learn and escpecially how I attepmt to teach you blithering idiots. Now open your books, granted however, you don't need help with that," His slow voice and deep tone frightened the first years, and Dumbledore had asked him on numerous occasions to try and be a bit more gentle with them. He however, believed that being gentle would be something they would come to regret in harsh times. You can't be gentle around the Dark Lord, you have to be hard and forceful. It was the only approach.

On his way out the door he pulled out his smokes and litt one up, the pale blue filth filling the air around his face. He enjoyed being able to smoke outside, and when he got to Howarts he would have to go all the way up to his tower - open the window and sit on the ledge to smoke one. Cravings barely took over him unless he was nervous about something or really pissed off.
A long walk and an even longer train ride awaited him, and though he'd never admit it to anyone.. Severus couldn't wait to get back where everything was right. People listened to him, obeyed him and feared him. Which is all any slightly morbid, lonely man would want. It was another year at Hogwarts, and to say the least, it would be an interesting one.

Severus had been moved up this year to Defence against the Dark Arts, and potions was left to be adorned by whichever Wizard Dumbledore chose to his liking. But Severus had not expected the choice made, though everyone seemed please to have one of their favorite students back, he was (after many unkind words against her) told to keep his 'tight lips' closed about the subject by many people.

After a long drag he flicked the cigarette ontop of a shrub and continued toward the train station. He had grown up taught to hate a certain kind of people, and admire another kind. He wonders if he had a different upbringing would he still hate the new teacher with such a force he could think her flying across a room and it happen, or would it make no difference whatsoever? He decided on the latter to ensure a clear mind once he reached Hogwarts, afterall Dumbledore may seem perfectly nice but if he knows somethings wrong he'll dive into your mind without a thought.

In the words of Alastar Moody, there are spots that don't come off. And she was one of them. He had not been able to stand her since her all too easy friendship with Potter (and Severus thanks the heavens that he hasn't seen that brat in years) and her all-knowing mind that he never once felt compelled to invade.

Finally reaching the train station, he pushed past kids in all directions and headed for his compartment to read, hoping none of the other teachers would interfere. Though every year it's a new one "Other head compartments are full up, do you mind?" (usually the person being Madam Pomfry) and without waiting for an answer would sit. So he just tried ot ignore them as best as possible. This year he had alot of reading to do on the dark arts. He'd been fishing for the slot for years, even though he wasn't completely wanting of it. He mainly liked it for the title. He loved potions, it was his passion and he hated leaving it. As much as he hated who was taking over it.

He sat down, next to the window, closing the curtains enough to darken the room but allow enough light in to read his book. Opening to page '148' he got lost in the defences of the subject. There were so many curses you could use, and alot of them needed acute concentration and a sturdy hand; which most wizards did not have.

His thoughts were interrupted by the last person he wanted to see while, undoubtably, looking unarmed.

"Do you mind if I take a seat with you? The others are full up," She asked, barely looking at him.

He waited for her to just take a seat anyways but, she, instead awaited an answer.

"Well, I don't exactly have a choice now, do I?" His mouth furling.

She tilted her head and stood up straighter. "You could say no if you really wanted to, which I suspect you do-" she sighed "I could always sit, uncomfortably, in a full compartment somewhere."

"Then why don't you do just that then?" He turned away and started reading again. A moment later her heard a click signaling the door was closed and she was gone.

This year would consist of him talking with her as little as possible, and showing Miss Granger that even though she is no longer his student, he is still he superior.