A/N: Well, I figured every fan fic author has to have some sort of Slash fic in their repertoire…Based off of an AIM conversation with Jissai.

DISCLAIMER: If you write slash and this offends you, I'm sorry. I'm only poking fun of Slash fic in general. I do not know if anyone named Jazzy-Otaku123 actually exists on this site; it was just some generic name that I came up with on a whim.

Enjoy :3

Do It for the Fans

Part 1

Merlin woke up to find himself in Arthur's bed. He quickly noticed that he was, well…under dressed. Completely. Alarmed, the boy quickly pulled up the covers to hide his 'wand' as he gave a loud shout.

"Oh, good, you're finally awake," the prince blandly replied, whom Merlin quickly noticed, was sitting right next to him.

"What do you mean?" Merlin challenged, when he noticed Arthur's nudity. He turned his head away, disgusted.

"Oh, god," he exclaimed as he shut his eyes , tight, "Gross! I didn't need to see that. Put your clothes back on…"

Merlin moaned. His head hurt, he was in Arthur's bed, he was naked, the prince was naked, and he didn't remember anything unusual happening prior. Was this some sort of sick punishment?

"I can't find them," Arthur replied.

Merlin noted the dull quality of his voice, as if something serious, besides the obvious, was bothering him.

"Oh, come on. I put them where I usually do," Merlin replied, staring intensely at the floor.

"I don't think it's your fault," Arthur said, which shocked Merlin.

Not his fault? This was serious.

"Say that again?" Merlin asked.

Arthur rolled his eyes at Merlin's obvious smugness.

"I don't think it's your fault, Merlin, because I know that though you're lacking some things in that thick head of yours, you're not mentally disturbed. Which someone has to be, to lock us in the room without our clothing. I can't even find my sword, for crying out loud."

Merlin listened, quietly, looking around the room. He instantly sensed the strong aura that surrounded it. Something wasn't right and was preventing them from leaving Arthur's bed chamber. Arthur continued ranting, scratching the back of his head as he spoke.

"I've tried everything, but the door won't budge. Even the glass from the window won't break."

"Maybe you're just getting weaker," Merlin bantered, half heartedly, his eyes falling onto a piece of paper that laid under his pillow.

"Merlin…" Arthur replied, his tone testy.

He boldly swung his head around to find Merlin reading it with a troubled expression on his face.

"What is it?" he asked.

When Merlin didn't answer, he tried again.

"Merlin," he practically bellowed, "I demand that you read whatever is on that stupid piece of paper at once!"

"D-dear Prince Arthur and Merlin," Merlin slowly read, "My name is Jazzy dash Oh-Take-You One, Two, Three. It has come to my attention that your show's season four has been postponed until two thousand and twelve. Now, me and all your other fans can't simply wait that long until seeing you two on your adventures, again. I figured that, as a way of protest, I could write this fan fiction in which you two …"

Merlin paused, making a face.

"Oh, this is just unfair," he said, shoving the letter to Arthur, "You read it. I can't anymore. This is sick…"

Arthur accepted the letter with a grim sigh, his eyes quickly scanning the paper.

"Dear Prince, yaddi yaddi yah," he muttered.

Suddenly, his eyes narrowed. His face blanched.

"In which you two have sex in order to raise awareness and potentially boost your show's ratings as well as boosting its next season's premiere this year," he whispered.

"I know I'm a young virgin, so I don't know much…," Merlin hoarsely continued, reciting from memory.

"But I know you two can do it and make it spectacular," Arthur spat, "Your loving writer, Jazzy."

"There's something else at the bottom," Merlin added, glumly.

"P.S. It's your only way to get out of this room and to get everything back to normal. Lubricants are in the night drawer?" Arthur read.

Enraged, Arthur proceeded to tear up the piece of paper.

"Arthur?" Merlin asked, watching as the prince gritted his teeth as he viciously attacked the letter.

His companion didn't respond, but proceeded to rip up the paper, muttering insults and threats.

A piece of paper, seemingly out of nowhere, floated down from the ceiling. Arthur, too distracted coming up with clever ways on how to kill his invisible tormenter, did not see it, so Merlin swiftly caught it.

Nice try, it read, But I'm serious. Do it for the fans! – Jazzy

"Arthur," Merlin said.

"Not now, Merlin," a miserable Arthur snapped, running a hand through his golden hair.

"Sire," Merlin replied, holding out the piece of paper in the prince's direction, "Read this."

"What?" Arthur asked, snatching the paper as he looked around the room, "Where'd you get that?"
"The ceiling," Merlin replied, bewildered.

Arthur groaned, and positioned himself so that he was face flat in his bed.

"This is just great," he muttered, "I will have you know that I absolutely refuse to touch you in that…dishonorable sort of way."

"Yeah, I don't fancy doin' it with you, myself," Merlin asked, "How is that even possible any….Oh."

"Aren't you the bright one," Arthur spat, with a sigh, "Look , maybe if we just wait, this…Jazzy will get bored and decide to let us go."

Merlin eagerly agreed.