Chapter 1: Breakfast in Bed
Alex leaned hard into the doorway of the crib as she stared across the room at Olivia Benson. They had been dating now for almost a full year but it seemed as though it had been a lifetime. Two lifetimes, actually. Her first lifetime as Alex Cabot had been fraught with a deep sexual tension between her and the daring detective. They had danced around their attraction. With a passion they pushed into their jobs they were able to crave each other without identifying their own feelings. They tamed each other with loud voices and shy glances. Their conversations, laced with innuendo, left Alex's blood pounding wondering if she was the one reading between the lines.
Alex could feel Olivia's intensity when they would collide in battle. While she always kept a calm façade, she could feel her pulse racing and blood hammering through her body. She believed deep down that both she and Olivia felt the same about each other though neither acted on it. Perhaps it was because of their jobs? Perhaps it was because the moment was never quite right? Perhaps it was because they had all the time in the world?
It wasn't until all the sand in their hour glass was gone that they realized how precious their time together had been. When Alexandra Cabot died the first time, she realized that she could not live without the warm eyes and quirky smile of Olivia Benson. She focused hard on being someone else but she longed to be nothing but Olivia's.
In her second lifetime as Alexandra Cabot, she was anxious to change things and get it right. No longer delusional that time was a luxury she could afford to spend idly; she quickly got back to work. When she had found her way back to New York, while she pined for a relationship with Olivia and tried to find her. In her new job at her old office, the rumors were that the detective was happily involved with her replacement. The rumor hit her with record speed and brutal efficiency. She decided to stay away because she knew that loving Olivia Benson now would mean leaving her alone.
After time, she fell into a comfortable numbness. Her work was an anesthetic that she could control, and she used it to put Olivia Benson out of her mind. She tried to move on and forget, but it always came back to the same lonely feeling and the same desperate sensation that her heart was incomplete.
One day they ran into each other quite physically. Alex, head down, stormed down the hall after losing a ruling she felt that a first year law student could have won. Her frustration, focused solely on a detective who couldn't follow a search warrant if she acted it out for him, made her long for the days when she worked with detectives that were competent. At the other end of the hall, Olivia Benson was sucked into her cell phone barreling down the hall to make it to a court appointment she was already late for, typing a furious message on a tiny keyboard. In a glorious moment, the two women collided. As two heads rose, two sets of eyes met.
"Alex," Olivia sucked in.
"Olivia," Alex startled.
As both of them stared at each other for a moment, the electric connection that had been severed sparked and sizzled alive. A hand reached out to be met by another. The two had reconnected and Alex discovered that her detective had missed her as much as she'd missed her detective. There had been no one else for Olivia, she had always held out hope that one day, Alex would come home.
From dinner to breakfast, the two stayed together, until one date became ten and ten became a lifetime. Olivia gave Alex strength, power, safety, and Alex gave Olivia understanding, peace, and family. Together, the two were desperately, hopelessly, wonderfully in love.
Since the detectives of SVU had caught a case nearly a day and a half before, Alex hadn't seen Olivia, but now, she watched her spread out on a tiny bunk, chest rising and falling slowly, with pieces of case files lying all around. Photos of a victim were flowing off of the cot and onto the floor and there was still a pen in Olivia's right hand. Alex sighed.
She watched as Olivia's head turned slightly, her hair fell gently over her face. From where she stood, Alex could see the dark lines etched under the detectives eyes which betrayed her lack of sleep. The entire squad had been running on thirty minute sleep breaks, which meant Olivia had been running on less. Alex knew better than to think that Liv would be willing to put herself and her needs first. No, for Olivia Benson, the victim would always come first.
Olivia was wearing the same clothes she had when she had left their home thirty six hours ago. The brunette's tucked in t-shirt had been pulled free from her jeans showing the taut skin of her lean torso and Alex smiled as she recognized her belt around Olivia's slim waist.
Elliot had smiled at her when she had walked into the precinct. "To what do we owe the honor at this early hour, Counselor?" He asked.
"Breakfast," Alex countered, with a smile.
"You are a Goddess," Munch groaned, grabbing boxes of food from her hands and spreading them over Elliot's desk.
"You guys make any progress?" Alex asked, while she watched them group around her and suck down the food as though they had never seen any before.
"That depends on what you qualify as progress," Fin complained, moving away from the group and flopping down into his desk. Stacks of papers piled over his desk and flowed onto Munch's.
"Ah, the glamorous work of an SVU Detective," Alex quipped.
Fin shook his head and stared into the pile in front of him. "Bastard kept every piece of paper he ever touched since kindergarten," he complained.
Munch walked over to the desks, "I don't know, this essay on dinosaurs is pretty fascinating. They are big." He read off the paper.
Fin stared at him with daggers in his eyes.
Alex smiled. She realized that this was probably the first real thing they'd eaten in awhile. She'd seen what was in Olivia's desk and watched her eat nothing but Doritos, a pudding cup, and a steady stream of caffeine for days at a time.
Alex gave Elliot a long look. "Liv?" She mouthed.
He shrugged and looked up the stairs. "Time for her to get up anyway. She probably won't try to rip your balls off." He whispered back.
Alex gave him a wry smile as she grabbed one of the Styrofoam containers of eggs and slowly walked up the stairs.
Elliot was the one person they had trusted with their relationship. Olivia, actually, had already told him about her feelings for Alex before she had come back into her life. Olivia couldn't explain to him why she was falling apart when Alex left.
As much as she wanted to pretend her sorrow was over losing a friend, her own reaction to Alex's loss told her all she needed to know. She had felt the arousal that had come from their fights but she had never before experienced the pain she felt as her heart ripped from her chest when Alex had died. Discovering Alex was alive, but not hers, focused the pain from a bland numb to a sharp stabbing that spread through her body and lodged firmly in her heart.
When they had come together, Elliot had known immediately that something had changed with his partner. They had they own sync and a skip in the beat magnified between them. As Alex had walked down the hall of the Superior Court Building, she had been shocked to feel Elliot's hand around her shoulder, his smile and congratulations for finally winning over his partner's heart flowing from his lips.
With a pause, Alex closed the door to the crib, flipping the lock. She knew that Elliott would be on the other side of the door keeping an eye out for them, but it wasn't worth taking the chance. Quietly, Alex stared at the sleeping form in front of her. Painfully aware of the sound of her heels on the linoleum she walked as quietly as possible across the room and gently sat down on the side of the bed.
She reached out her hand and rubbed the gentle curve of Olivia's chin, leaning into her ear and smiling. "Liv?"
"Alex," was the happy response. Olivia's body responded to Alex's proximity by trying to curl around her.
"Liv," Alex whispered again, pulling down her girlfriend's shirt and pushing her hair off her face. "Time to wake up sweetheart," she whispered gently.
"Mmmm," Liv mumbled as she let her eyes open. Her smile grew as she saw that Alex was actually sitting with her and it wasn't a cruel joke from her lack of sleep. "How come you're here?"
Alex smiled down at Olivia. "I brought you some stuff," she said, pointing down to the eggs she carried and the bag slung over her arm. Alex leaned down and attempted to catch Olivia's lips in a kiss and frowned when she pulled her head back.
"You don't want to do that," Olivia moaned, covering her mouth with her sleeve.
"Why not?" Alex asked, trying to not sound as disappointed as she felt.
"Because the last time I brushed my teeth, I was with you and that was," Olivia said as she looked at her watch and shook her head, "thirty seven hours ago."
"Ew." Alex laughed. "Well you're in luck; I have a toothbrush in this bag with your name on it."
"Are you serious?" Olivia asked, wide eyed.
Instead of answering, Alex reached into her bag and pulled out a toothbrush and a tiny tube of toothpaste and put it into Olivia's hand. "Oh my god." Olivia said, staring at the toothbrush. She stopped and looked up. "What else do you have in that bag?" She asked with a sly smile.
"Hmm," Alex said, rooting around. She pulled out a pair of jeans and a clean shirt. Olivia's smile widened as she watched things come out of the bag. Then Alex produced a lacy black bra with matching bottoms, which made Olivia laugh out loud.
"And that's for?" she asked, fingering the lacy garment and letting it hang from her finger.
"That's the gift I'm giving myself." Alex smiled, raising her eyebrow. "Oh, and I almost forgot, breakfast in bed."
Olivia grabbed the container from Alex and popped it open. "God it smells good."
"When was the last time you ate?" Alex asked as Olivia sat up and grabbed a fork from her.
Olivia looked at the food, and then back at Alex. "What day is it?" She asked scratching her head.
"That's what I thought." Alex said, shaking her head.
"I know," Olivia said, offering Alex a bite from her fork. "We're close though."
"That's good. You planning on coming home tonight or should I bring you jammies?" Alex smiled.
"No, no, I'm coming home. I'll call you, promise."
Alex smiled. She leaned over and kissed Olivia's nose. She stood up slowly and started to walk across the room.
"Hey Al," Olivia called, and she looked over her shoulder.
"Want to wait for me to brush my teeth and then we can make out?" She asked with a smile she tried hard to suppress.
"Tempting." Alex said, shaking her head. "But no. Get back to work, Detective."
"Anything for you, Counselor."
To Be Continued...