"Men have called me mad; but the question is not yet settled, whether madness is or is not the loftiest intelligence– whether much that is glorious– whether all that is profound– does not spring from disease of thought– from moods of mind exalted at the expense of the general intellect." -Edgar Allen Poe

It was absolutely astounding how dumb they could be. How they could figure out so much in such little time, yet completely missed the most obvious things.

They were geniuses!

They were morons.

They were intriguing.

He was enraptured by the paradox of their minds. Of course, being that his attention span was so short, he quickly forgot that he was supposed to be paying attention to them. There were so many wondrously shiny things to attract his focus. So many devious plans to ponder, pranks to pull, conversations to eavesdrop on. But somehow it always came back to the children.

The Pine Tree. The Shooting Star. Dipper and Mabel. They were connected. They were all connected. In ways they couldn't possibly understand!

He sometimes wondered if even he understood the true nature of how they fit the puzzle. So many questions. So many questions.

But he knew things. He knew lots of things that they didn't.

No one knew what he knew! Well… There was that one guy. But after what had happened thirty years ago, he doubted he would be hearing from him any time soon.

The Pine Tree and the Shooting Star, though… They could be problems.

They could be answers.

They could just be two kids who had no idea what they were getting themselves into.

They had the journal, but they still kept secrets. And secrets could be dangerous.

He laughed to himself.

Dipper was paranoid and observant yet somewhat oblivious.

Mabel seemed oblivious yet he knew she understood more than even she thought she did.

The time would come when- Hey, look! A squirrel fighting a frog for supreme dominion over the miniscule woodland creatures!

FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!

Where was he?

Oh, yes. The twins. Now where had they run off to?

Many times he had been labeled insane. He didn't mind. He was actually flattered by the brand. He scared people and that was perfectly fine by him.

There were times when his odd, little fixation with the Pines twins made him question just how far off the deep end he'd gone, but he rarely paid any real attention to such thoughts.

Insanity to most was brilliance to some.

And his was by far the most brilliant mind he had every known.

He didn't care what people thought of him.

But he was sure to frequent their nightmares. It was his thing.

Oh, the Pines. There they were.

He settled in the trees and watched as they played one of their silly games with the Question Mark, Soos.

Watch out for the handy man, kiddies. He knows more than he lets on.

A Gnome ran for cover a few yards away.

Weird things, Gnomes. He wondered how their Queen hunt was going.

He snapped his attention back to the twins. They had finished their game and were moving on to some other activity.

He noticed Dipper shove a book into his vest.

Oh, yes, another mysterious adventure into the magical realm of the Gravity Falls forest. What would the Pines get into today?

"Hey!"

He looked down from his perch in the tree to see Mabel staring up at him.

"Hey! Weird, old man! What are you doing up there?"

McGucket cocked his head and looked at nothing in particular. "What am I doin' anywhere?" He then proceeded to do a random jig on the branch until it broke under his weight and he fell to the ground, laughing hysterically.

Mabel stared at him for a moment before slowly backing away and then running for her brother and Soos.

Once the girl was out of sight, McGucket rose to his feet and looked around. "I've been watchin' you kids," he whispered with a crazed look in his eyes. "I've been watchin' ya real close."

He noticed then that the highest window on the Mystery Shack had changed just slightly. The design on the glass somewhat resembled an-

McGucket squawked and scurried into some bushes to hide. "I guess I ain't the only one watchin'." He then threw his body at a Possum that had wandered too close and began to wrestle it to the ground, yelling about how he would become supreme overlord of the nocturnal beasts of the forest and raise up an army to overthrow the order of government and squirt bottle factories.

Bill watched in amusement from his Nightmare realm in the Dreamscape. The old coot was even more a freak than he used to be!

"I can't believe he actually thinks he can hide from me!" he shouted in fits of laughter. "I know more than you, old man! I know your secrets! I know your fears! I KNOW THE EXACT DATE OF THE LAST TIME YOU CHANGED YOUR UNDERWEAR AND BOY THAT SURE WAS A LONG TIME AGO!"

He paused, suddenly becoming much more solemn. "I know who you really are. I know your act. Don't think I can't get in your head like I did all those years ago. I'll come back for you and I'll…" his voice trailed off as he watched the old man begin wrestling with some random Possum.

"Well… That's weird."

The window changed back to normal.

McGucket chuckled. "I knows yer tricks, Triangulum man. Ya won't catch old man McGucket again." With that, he disappeared into the trees.

I often think that McGucket isn't really as insane as he seems.