Disclaimer: I don't own Star Wars or profit from it. I just dream in their worlds. Thanks to Lucasfilm and all it's actors and crew for these wonderful movies.
This is an alternate universe and a Sequel to Heroes Homecoming. It will make more sense if you read that one first. If you don't, remember some of our heroes that died in the movies are alive and well.
Anakin Skywalker peered at the damaged, knocked over furniture with a worried frown. He was considering the implications with some alarm.
The door slid open and Princess Leia came in, stiff and wary. She had one hand on her blaster and was glancing around the room and glaring at him.
"I assure you Princess. He was unconscious at the time. He could not have caused the damage."
The medical droid informed her, coming in right behind her.
"Oh sure. We have Darth Vader here, no one else is in the room, Luke is off on a mission with Ahsoka and Obi-Wan had to run off to do some negotiating for long lost jedi artifacts. And the furniture in the room just spontaneously shattered according to the security viewers."
Anakin pursed his lips. He bit his tongue, resisting the urge to explain or comment. It was a wonder they hadn't hauled off and shot him on the spot when he'd arrived instead of just taking into custody. His wife, son and Obi-Wan had done some impressive persuading to convince them not to kill him. The medical droid had insisted on keeping an eye on him due to the way he was coughing and sneezing after his brief planetary visit. It was concerned he'd overtaxed his immune system since he'd been out of the helmet for the first time in decades.
Obi-Wan had been the one to insist they share quarters, and they compromised by creating a cell of one of the smaller rooms off a larger one. When Obi-Wan was there he pretty much stuck to the shared area of their quarters. Obi-Wan was not there now. Perhaps which is why it chose to happen now, subconsciously, his friend's presence had helped calm him.
Leia was still afraid of him, but equally determined to keep an eye on him. It was only her love for Luke and respect for Obi-Wan that prevented her voting to just blast him. But she had only compromised to the point of 'wait and see'. From her point of view, he had a parole he didn't deserve and any violation could be the end of him. This could well be it.
"Well?" She challenged him through the shield blocking him from the rest of the wrecked room. "Aren't you going to say anything?"
He shrugged helplessly. "Like what? All I can say is I have no memory of room wrecking."
She glared but he could detect the flicker of shock at the response. There was a hint of sarcasm that was all Anakin and no Vader at all and she didn't know what to make of it.
She could glare all she wanted, he thought. It was the truth. He was pretty sure he'd done it but it wasn't because he remembered it. It was because of the dream. And trying to explain that was probably hopeless.
She huffed angrily and spun out of the room, leaving a security droid behind.
Anakin gave it a cursory look, wondering how many such droids he'd junked over the Clone Wars. Then he collapsed back on his bunk and stared at the ceiling. It had been the worst nightmare yet. Mustafar to Leia's prison cell and suddenly a the cowering but feisty princess he was tormenting had changed into Padme and then into his mother. He was pretty sure that's when he had lashed out in a self destructive panic.
"You could try and explain it to her." A voice floated out of nowhere. A blue glow solidified near the bed. Qui-Gon Jinn considered him thoughtfully. "She shares this nightmare of what Darth Vader did to her."
"She doesn't want to understand."
"It frightens her. It's always simpler to see the enemy as someone unlike yourself."
"I know." Anakin said fervently.
"You will need help to deal with this. I will do my best, but you need help I cannot give. Until Obi-Wan and Luke get back, you have little to lose by making the effort."
"It'll scare her worse, knowing I'm not only a threat when awake and conscious but asleep."
"She is Force sensitive Anakin. Do you truly think she hasn't sensed the disturbance?"
Anakin rolled upright and looked at him, startled. "She hasn't mentioned it. Not that she'd confide in me, but I think she would Luke or Obi-Wan."
"It didn't happen when they were here. She might not recognize it as a force disturbance at all."
"She might mention it to Padmé. She might know." Or Bail, of course. But he wouldn't share that with Anakin. Anakin wasn't sure how much Bail distrusted him, feared him, or was angry over his betrayal. But he knew the man wasn't willing to give up the protectiveness of being her adopted father to a biological father who had hurt her, even if it was done in ignorance. He couldn't blame him.
"You know the danger if she doesn't let go of her anger. It will poison her."
Anakin sighed. He wasn't even sure how to stop being angry at himself when the memories hit. How was he going to convince her too?
For two days and nights he resisted the urge to sleep again. He settled for meditation. Finally though he couldn't help it. Between boredom at being locked up alone and still recovering from years in the life support his body just gave out. And with his defenses down, the nightmares came again.
In his mind, he was in the Jedi temple striking down younglings. His body moved automatically, encased in the shelled armor of Darth Vader. But inside he was Anakin, screaming, trying to stop. He tried with all he possessed, to stop his muscles, even freezing himself in place with the force or pushing away those his body tried to kill. Nothing worked. Nothing. He saw Qui-Gon and his body lashed out, cutting him down. But Qui-Gon kept coming back.
"I am here Anakin. You are not alone."
"I can't stop it! Help me!"
"You cannot change the past. Only endure the memory and learn from your mistakes."
Anakin was weeping inside the helmet. "Please."
"You must learn to let them go. Even in dreams. They know you have returned to the light. Your duty now is to stay there."
In his bed, Anakin tossed and turned violently. And his force powers were lashing out, rattling the furniture.
Leia came into the main quarters with Padmé.
"Anakin! Ani wake up." Padmé shouted she shouted, hitting the switch to open the outer door of the cell.
"What are you doing?" Leia shrieked.
"Stay back ma…." the droid slammed hard away from the cell and into the far wall, tossed by an invisible force.
Leia pulled her gun, grabbing for her comlink.
Padmé grabbed her wrist preventing her calling security. "No! He doesn't know what he's doing…"
"Anakin! Wake up!"
The voice penetrated the dream and he looked wildly around in the blood stained terror of his dream. "Padmé!" There was no sign of her in the temple. Thank goodness. He didn't want her to see this horror…yet her voice was right there. He spun around looking for her so violently that he crashed off the bed onto the floor and against the wall.
"Ow." He blinked, eyes opening in bewilderment. Disoriented, he finally forced himself to look around.
"Anakin! Are you all right?"
Was he? He took stock. Nothing but bruised from flinging himself off the bed. He was cold, chilled from sweat. "I think so." He paused, rubbing his forehead, disoriented. "How's the furniture?" He asked, in a faint effort to deflect attention. "Well, you'd already knocked that over but the droid isn't too happy."
"Sorry." He said, distracted.
"So much for not remembering doing it." Leia growled.
"I don't remember it. But … I was having nightmares and I woke up and the room was wrecked so I figured …"
"Using the force in your sleep." Padmé said slowly. "That's bad."
"I hadn't noticed." Anakin grumbled dryly.
"Bad? That's ridiculous. That's imposs…" Leia stopped as Padmé turned to stare at her daughter. "And how many Jedi have you know personally?"
Leia flushed at this.
"Why now? Why did it have to be now when Obi-Wan is gone?" Padmé fretted.
"That may be the point. Knowing he's here might be making a difference." Anakin sighed.
Padmé smiled at this, picking up a chair and setting it upright. "That deeply buried Master Padawan bond has reasserted itself."
"Fortunately."
"So this really happens to Jedi, not just Sith?" Leia asked skeptically.
Anakin slowly climbed back on to the bed and sat on the edge, elbows on knees and hands dangling. He didn't point out that what was a dream for a Sith was a nightmare for anyone else. "Not unheard of. Back in the …" He swallowed as his nightmare memory flickered to the surface, "Jedi temple, sometimes you'd hear a student yelling and feel the disturbance. It was usually a Force vision disguised as a dream."
"So what's this one?" Leia demanded.
Anakin's eyes glued to the floor. "Scrambled visions of the past." The only difference between nightmare and reality was that he hadn't been in the helmet and mask when he had slaughtered the Jedi. He fought back the sickness the memory triggered.
"Oh." Padmé touched the wall next to the shield. She fidgeted. She wanted to go in to him. To wrap him in a hug and remind him that no matter what he'd done, it was over. They were starting fresh. But she had promised, they both had, not to have physical contact when the Jedi were not present. At least not until Obi-Wan thought the time was right. Not that he needed physical contact to inflict harm. But the Alliance leaders didn't trust him not to influence or hurt her. Padmé knew better and she wasn't about to tell them what happened on Mustafar. Anakin wasn't one to repeat his mistakes once he'd acknowledged he'd made them. But he needed to remember his honor, remember the discipline that came of being a Jedi. Needed it to fight off the temptations of the forbidden knowledge he now harbored. And she agreed with that. It wasn't necessarily forever. But for now it was for the best.
Leia fidgeted too. She was uncomfortable with Padmé's forgiveness. "I'm going to get a replacement guard droid. For whatever good it'll do."
"I ... should ..." Padmé hated to leave him.
"It's okay." He smiled faintly. "It helps just knowing you're around."
She smiled back, faintly and turned away before he could see her tears. Not that he wouldn't know they were there anyway.
to be continued