Disclaimer: I don't own "Will & Grace", they belong to NBC and KoMut Productions.
Author's note: My first Will and Grace fic. It's mostly Jack and Karen, with a lot of Will and Grace sweetness interspersed between. This fic takes place after the season finale, but Karen and Rosario never left the boat. Basically it's an alternative ending and continuation.
When Somebody Loves You
The water was deep, endlessly blue as the yacht hissed silently through the waves. Jack McFarland leaned over the railing watching the trail of white through the water. The sky was clear blue, just like his eyes, which were just visible in his reflection in the dull chrome of the railing around the deck. He liked his reflection, he thought with a grin.
"Jack?"
He knew that voice anywhere, and turned to meet the hazel-green gaze of his best friend. "Hey, Karen."
Karen Walker. His best friend. Sweet, sexy, obscene, irreverent, a damn good kisser… and here she was, tearstains still evident on her cheeks even though she had changed out of her clothes into a black bathing suit with a long sarong tied around her waist and sweeping the floor. She was barefoot and looked tired and in need of a hug.
And so Jack opened his arms. And Karen knew he understood, as she moved into his warm embrace. "Come on, Karen. Watch the sky with me." Jack pointed to the horizon. The gold of sunset was just beginning to seep up from the sea, fused with pink and lavender. Karen leaned her head on his chest. He was almost a foot taller than her; he just radiated protection, and his arms were comforting. They stood that way for a long time as the sun sank lower and lower and the sky glowed with the approaching night.
"Hey, Jack?"
"Yeah, Kare?"
"I miss him."
Jack drew her closer. "I know. Me too." Then he had an idea. "But look at the sky. It's a sunset, but you know there's another day just waiting to spring up, don't you?"
Karen nodded. "Yeah."
"So think of it this way: just because this day is ended doesn't mean there can't be a day after it. Just because Stan's gone doesn't mean his bank account is. Or his penthouse. Or… the way you loved him. He's there, just not in person."
"Oh, Jack." Karen buried her head in his shoulder. "I never thought that Disney-sweet sap could make me feel better, but it did."
"Let's have a drink," Jack suggested. "And get Will and Grace out here and have dinner on deck."
"I'm not the in the mood for company," Karen said. "Just bourbon on the rocks, and my poodle." She made to call Rosario, but Jack stopped her.
"I'll get it," he said. "You stay here."
Karen let him go, sitting herself down in one of the recliners on the deck. She thought how wonderful Jack was being.
* * *
"Hey." Will put an arm around Grace, who was slumped on the sofa in the living room on the boat. He flopped down next to her. "You look depressed."
Grace sighed and leaned on him. "Wouldn't you be if your husband was off in some remote island paradise with the hottest blonde you've ever seen, no wife to stop him, and a love letter hotter than herself?"
"Oh Grace." Will stroked her hair and got a dreamy look on his face. "Yeah, she was pretty hot."
"See what I mean?" Grace exclaimed. "Even you think she's gorgeous. So what am I supposed to do while she's chasing him?"
"Gracie, sweetheart, the backwaters of Guatemala are hardly an island paradise. Do you really trust him that little?" Will asked. "Come on, you married the man. You must have known something was there."
Grace pouted. "I don't know what to do."
"Sweetheart, trust me. He's not going to cheat on you. He loves you." Will kissed her on the forehead. "And so do I. So will you trust me when I tell you it's all right?"
Grace smiled up at her best friend. "You really think so?"
"I really do."
"Then I trust you." Grace nestled into his embrace. She craned her neck and looked out the window at a sky stained with the colors of a tropical sunset. "It's beautiful out here, isn't it?"
"Evening, ladies," Jack swept in and went straight to the mini-bar. "Where's the bourbon?" He opened the little fridge.
"Left side," Will answered, looking over at him. He frowned. "When did you develop a taste for it?"
"Not for me. It's for Karen," Jack replied. "I'm having a wine cooler. It doesn't pay to get drunk around a really deep, really big body of water, you know? I get silly when I'm tipsy."
Grace looked at Will and they both started to laugh. Jack poured the bourbon over the ice with a flourish and grabbed a wine cooler out of the mini-bar and swung the door shut with his foot. "See you girls later." He went back out onto the deck and Will switched on the stereo. "Just relax," he said to Grace. "It's all going to be fine."
* * * *
Jack handed Karen the tumbler of liquor and squeezed into the oversize recliner next to her. "So talk to me."
Karen shook her head as she sipped the bourbon. "Nothing to say. I managed to get Lorraine away from me. The bitch wanted half the money!"
Jack nodded. "What a whore." Meanwhile yesterday he had been ready to side with whoever got the money. Now he felt guilty. He knew he loved Karen, money or not.
Karen put the glass down suddenly and paled. She flew out of her seat and leaned over the rail, her stomach doing full flips. Jack heard her cough and groan. He rushed up. "Karen! Karen!"
Karen lifted her head from over the rail. Her face was pale and she was shaking. "Oh my god, Karen, are you all right?"
Karen swallowed hard. "Yeah," she managed. "I must… I must have had too much to drink."
"Two martinis and barely a sip of bourbon!" Jack exclaimed. "That's nothing!" Karen never had too much to drink. She was a human sponge!
Karen sank down into the lounge chair. "It happened earlier too," she managed. "Am I sick?"
Jack shook his head. "You never get sick. It's impossible." But Karen looked pale. He pushed her hair back from her face. "Listen, Kare, I'm going to go get Driver or something. You need to be back on land. You need a doctor. Stay there."
"Driver's a doctor, isn't he?" Karen asked faintly, her eyes barely open. Thoughts were running a million miles a minute through her head. The last time she'd felt this way was… years ago… when… "No," she said out loud, fear making her voice shake. "No. I'm not."
"Not what?" Jack came back with Driver in tow. Driver looked bemused, but that was his usual expression. He was half-with-it usually, and it was anyone's guess as to why Karen kept him employed instead of giving him a comfortable retirement somewhere far away.
"Nothing," Karen replied. She closed her eyes as another wave of dizziness swept over her. "I'm not… sick."
Driver bent slowly over her. "Mrs. Walker…"
Karen cut him off. "I'm fine."
"You don't sound fine," Grace's voice preceded her as she and Will came up on deck. Grace crouched down in front of the recliner. "Karen, you're all pale."
Karen's jaw tightened. "I'm not sick! Leave me alone." She got to her feet, albeit a little unsteadily, and took Jack's arm for support. "I'm going to bed."
"Do you want anything, Karen?" Will called after her. "We'll bring you something to eat."
"No, Wilma. Let me go," Karen said, leaning heavily on Jack and making her way downstairs to the bunks. She let Jack open the door to her room and collapsed on the bed.
Jack headed straight for the mini-bar in the corner of the room and opened it. It was stocked abundantly will all of Karen's favorite liquors. He selected the ingredients for a martini and set them on top of the little fridge.
"No," Karen said when she saw what he was doing. "No more drinks."
Jack shot her a surprised look and slowly put the things away. "Not even an olive?"
Karen turned her face away into the pillow. "No food or drink."
Jack sat down next to her on the bed and drew her into his arms. "So I guess this trumps our dinner plans, huh?"
Karen leaned on him and looked up at him. "Sorry, poodle."
"No apologies," Jack said, putting a finger to her lips. "You are mine to take care of now."
Karen sat up and reached for her date book on the dresser next to the bed. She opened it and flipped through the pages. She was looking for one thing. The red "K" in a circle that marked when she would get her period. She found it and frowned. "Jackie, what's the date?"
Jack looked down at the watch Karen had bought him. "Um… June 24th."
The red "K" was on June 16th. Why didn't she realize it? Eight days late.
She put a hand over her mouth. "No. No-no-no-no."
"What?" Jack instantly was alert. He leaned over her to look into the book. "Karen, what?"
"Oh, god, Jack." She looked up into his eyes. "I think…"
Jack looked down at the book, at his watch, and at his best friend, comprehending. "Oh, Karen."
Karen shut the book in shock. "I can't be. I just can't be pregnant."
Jack let her lean against him. "When we get onshore, the first thing we're doing is finding a drug store and buying two tests."
"Two?" Karen queried. "Why two?"
"Remember last time? I'm not letting you go through this alone."
Karen smiled. She'd been so terrified that Jack had bought another test and taken it with her to make her feel better. Thankfully it had been negative that time, but she remembered clearly not ever feeling nauseous like she did now. And she'd been eating an unusual amount of fruit lately, something she rarely ate, but now she was insatiable.
"Thanks, poodle," she said gratefully, feeling some of the shock wear off.
"Are you hungry now?" Jack asked.
Karen thought for a moment. "I could do with a little food." The nausea had receded.
"What can I get you?"
Karen narrowed her eyes. "Hmmm. Last I checked there were kiwis and strawberries in the kitchen."
Jack leaned on the doorframe. "Anything else?"
Karen shook her head. "If there's juice, bring it on. And don't neglect yourself, poodle. Bring something for you."
"Don't you worry," Jack swished out the door. "I wouldn't think of depriving myself."
Fifteen minutes later Jack was back with a tray positively loaded with food. "Wow, Jack," Karen said. "Are you planning to lock us in here for several days?"
"Ooh," Jack said. "Sounds sexy." He giggled. "But no. You're not well and we're going to make you better." He held up a bunch of grapes. "Now. Sit back, relax, and…" He plucked a grape off the stem and popped it into Karen's mouth. "Let me entertain you… let me make you smile…"
Karen laughed as he started to sing. "Let me do a few tricks, some old and then some new tricks, I'm very versatile!"
"Those aren't the words," she laughed.
"Who cares?" Jack said, tumbling off the bed onto his feet. "Works for the moment, no? I was thinking of adding it to… Jack 2003!"
Karen laughed delightedly. Jack danced around the room for a few moments, and then a frowned settled onto his beautiful boyish features. "It doesn't work with just one person," he said, eyeing his best friend. "Dance with me."
"What?" Karen looked almost embarrassed. "Jackie, I don't…"
Jack took her by the hand and pulled her up onto her floor. "Come on, Kare, the carpet's thick, your feet won't hurt."
Well, there went her biggest excuse. Karen sighed and let Jack pull her over to the stereo. He pushed the play button and waited for the music to start. "Ah, good, jazz," he said. "You have very good taste."
Karen leaned her head on his chest, letting him sway her. "I do try."
"Music is the remedy for anything," Jack said. "And bad day you have can be cured by a little music and a little chocolate."
The rumble of his voice in his chest was soothing, Karen thought vaguely, listening to his heart beat.
"Jackie, I'm going to fall asleep on my feet," she murmured. "Put on the radio or something."
Jack pouted. "Fine, fine." He pushed the button to switch CDs. "How's this?" Karen didn't recognize the song at first, but then it dawned on her. Frank Sinatra. She'd always had a taste for him, but really never indulged it except for buying a few of his albums. In fact, her personal CD collection had a bunch of her favorites. Steely Dan, Chicago, Manhattan Transfer, Simon and Garfunkel, Josh Groban… a lot of sentimental crap... along with Mozart, Bach, and Beethoven, of course. Classical music was very therapeutic.
When somebody loves
you,
It's no good unless she loves you
All the way…
Happy to be near you,
When you need someone to cheer you…
All the way.
Thoughts ran through Karen's head. She remembered the wedding reception when Stan had twirled her onto the dance floor (a little too fast), and the DJ switched on this song. Karen had been ecstatic at the prospect of so much money, so much that the memory of the whole party had escaped her. But now, in Jack's arms, the song took on a whole new meaning.
Taller than the
tallest trees,
That's how it's got to feel.
Deeper than the deep blue sea,
That's how deep it goes… if it's real.
Jack was singing along, she realized a moment later, and smiled. He had such a beautiful voice. A beautiful voice to go with those beautiful eyes.
When somebody needs
you,
It's no good unless she needs you,
All the way.
Through the good or lean years,
And for all those in-between years,
Come what may.
Who knows where the road may lead us?
Only a fool would say.
But if you let me love you,
It's for sure I'm gonna love you…
All the way.
A deep sigh escaped Jack, and Karen looked up. She felt like she was dancing at her wedding all over again, but this time she had done it right. The thought made her smile, and Jack smiled back.
"What?" he asked, almost in a whisper.
"Nothing," Karen replied equally softly. "You were right. Music is the cure." She didn't want to leave his embrace, but Jack moved over to turn off the music and headed for the tray of food.
"C'mon, let's get Will and Grace in here and pig out," Jack said, and went to the door. "Wilma! Gracie! Food!"
Almost immediately their friends appeared. "Is that the dinner bell?" Will's voice came floating down the hallway, heavy on the British accent.
"Will Truman, I'm going for the eyelids!" came Grace's voice right behind him.
"Okay, okay."
They piled into the room. "Ooh, caviar," Grace said. "Yum." She went straight for the caviar and crackers.
"Hey, hey, hey! Easy on the pastries!" Jack swatted Will's hand as he reached for the little chocolate donuts. "Why not just tape them directly to your hips?"
Karen clapped a hand over her mouth to keep from laughing as Will swatted Jack on the back of the head. "Easy, Jack, I'm not going to stuff myself." He popped a little coffee cake into his mouth.
"So are you feeling better?" Grace asked, sitting on the bed next to Karen.
"Much," Karen answered, pulling a strawberry off the top of the éclair Grace was eating. Grace looked at her for a moment and then shook her head.
"Just a bug?" Will added, settling himself on Karen's other side.
"Hey, make room," Jack protested, burrowing in between them and holding a finger sandwich aloft.
"Yeah," Karen lied. "Just a bug."
Jack shot her a look, and she shook her head slightly. Well, if she wanted to keep it a secret for now, it was her business. Besides, they weren't even sure yet. Best not to say anything.
Grace leaned back against the headboard. "How gorgeous is it out here?"
"Yeah, I know," Will said. "I'd like one of these boats."
Karen laughed a little. "Marry a rich man, and you're all set."
Everyone burst out laughing. "It's entirely possible!" Will said, popping a grape into his mouth.
"Now, now, money can't buy love," Grace said, shaking a finger in mock-scolding.
There was a pause, and everyone busted up, Karen especially. "Sure it can," she said. "There are a whole slew of banks around the world that tell me how much I loved Stanley Walker."
"Listen," Karen said a moment later. "I'm getting a little tired. Can you guys clear out?"
"No problem," Will said, picking up the tray with all the food and taking Grace's hand. "We'll let you get to sleep. Hope you feel better."
"Night, Karen," Grace said, leaning over and giving Karen a hug. Karen cringed a bit. Emotion. Ugh.
Will and Grace went out of the room, and Jack leaned over and pulled the covers up over his best friend. "Want me to go?"
Karen smiled at him. "No." She scooted over a bit. "C'mere." She folded back the covers and patted the mattress. "Talk to me, honey."
Jack jumped into the bed and covered himself up, putting an arm around Karen. "What's the matter?"
Karen didn't answer for a moment, leaning on his shoulder. "I'm a little scared," she admitted after a moment. "Last time I was so relieved, Jack, you have no idea…"
Jack nodded. "But you know we all would have been there for you, right?"
"But Jack." Karen looked more serious than he had ever seen her in his life. "I really… I didn't want a baby then. And I don't think I want a baby now."
Jack frowned. "What are you saying?"
"I don't know," Karen said. "I just don't know."
"Karen, are you saying you want to have an abortion?" Jack got up from the bed. "'Cause if you do…"
Karen looked away.
"Karen, if you get rid of this baby, I swear to God I will have nothing to do with you in the future." Jack didn't move. "And if you think I'm kidding, go ahead."
Karen turned stricken eyes on him. "What?"
"I'm serious, Karen," Jack said. "I love you, but if you're pregnant, I want to meet that little extension of you and you don't have any right to deprive me of that."
Karen buried her face in her hands. "Go away, Jack."
Jack sighed. "Fine. Have it your way." He left the cabin and shut the door silently behind him.
"Oh, shit!" Karen swore violently and buried her head in the pillows. Stanley Walker, you just couldn't leave this world without leaving something behind, could you? Her thoughts were venomous. Sometimes I think I hate you, Stan.
* * * *
"Do you think Karen's okay?" Grace asked as Will led her back up onto the deck. The sky was completely black now, spangled with stars, clearly visible in a way that New York lights made impossible.
"Sure," Will said. "You know Karen, she never gets sick. I don't think she has a normal circulation system."
Grace laughed. "Yeah. I always wondered how seven martinis and countless bourbons could fail to knock a person senseless."
Will put an arm around his friend. "Still worried?"
Grace shook her head. "Will, you let me marry him. I knew it would be okay then."
"What?" Will asked, puzzled.
"Well, I think if you had really hated him you would have told me, right?"
"Yes, but would you have dumped him?" Will looked quizzically at her. "You're your own woman, Gracie, I don't think it's up to me whether or not you can date a guy."
"No," Grace answered. "But I certainly wouldn't have married him. Because you would have been right. You've always been right about things like that."
Will frowned for a moment and then grinned. "You really trust me that much?"
Grace looked at him. "Are you kidding?" She pushed her hair out of her face as a breeze began to blow. "Will, you are my best friend. Remember what I told you on the rooftop? I'm going to spend the rest of my life with you. And that's gotta mean something, right?"
Will grinned. "Thanks."
Grace leaned on his shoulder and he put his arms around her. Planting a kiss on the top of her head, they looked up at the sky.
"Check this out," Will said, and took Grace's hand. He guided it to a point in the sky. "There's Orion."
Grace looked at him in astonishment. "I didn't know you knew where the constellations were."
Will laughed and moved her hand over. "Surprise, surprise. There's the North Star. And there's the Summer Triangle."
Grace tilted her head up to look at the vast expanse of stars. "Strange how this huge multitude of stars has just one that can lead you home." She looked at Will meaningfully, and he blushed.
"Gracie, you just got overly deep," he said, trying to mask his pleasure at her compliment.
Grace laughed. "I'm prone to that sometimes." She turned to face her best friend. "Aren't you tired yet?"
"It's eight o' clock," Will said, looking at his watch. "I have a good two hours before I conk out in front of the news."
Grace led him back downstairs. "Then let's have a drink and enjoy our last night on the water. Soon it's gonna be concrete and pavement and honking cars and reality again." She poured two glasses of wine. "I plan to enjoy this as much as possible." She flopped down on the sofa and toasted Will with a grin. They clinked glasses and Grace sipped the wine. "Mm," she said. "The one good thing about Karen's place is that you have the best of everything."
"Amen to that," Will replied. "Best wine I've have in a long time." He leaned back.
An hour later, they were sprawled over each other, laughing for no reason. Jack walked in, looking completely lost.
"Hey, Nancy," Will greeted. "Want some wine?"
"No," Jack said shortly. He sat down heavily in the armchair next to the sofa.
"What's with you?" Grace asked, putting her glass down.
"Nothing." Jack leaned his head in his hands.
"Come on, Jack," Will said, easing Grace up off him and sitting up. "What's going on? Do you miss Armando?" Will named Jack's latest fling. "He's going to be there when you get back."
Jack looked at him in half-disgust. "Will. Come on, I'm upset."
"About what?" Grace pulled herself into a sitting position.
Jack shook his head. "You have to swear to say nothing. And I mean swear. If Karen finds out you know she's going to kill me. And I'll kill you both if you blab."
Will and Grace looked surprised. "Your secret is safe with us," Will said.
"Completely," Grace agreed.
Jack sighed. "Okay. Listen. Karen was sick earlier. We think she might be pregnant."
That stopped Will and Grace right away. The human body is capable of overcoming whatever ailments it may have in a flash. No matter how drunk you are, you sober up if the chair bites you in the leg. This was the metaphorical equivalent, and the merlot was forgotten and gone.
"She's what?" they exclaimed at the same time.
"Yeah. I know." Jack crossed his legs. "And… I think she wants to have an abortion."
"Again. What?" Will said. "An abortion?"
"It's her right, but God!" Jack said. "That's not fair!"
"No. It isn't," Grace said. "Oh my god. Karen with a baby."
"She can't get rid of it, she just can't!" Jack said miserably.
"Maybe one of us can talk to her," Will suggested. "Gracie?"
"Why me?" Grace looked horrified.
"Because pregnancy is a woman thing," Will explained. "And since you're the only other one with a uterus here…"
Grace looked embarrassed. "I've never been pregnant before."
"So?" Jack sat up. "Grace, you have to help her. If she gets rid of this baby I will never forgive her."
Grace looked at Jack, seeing how truly upset he was, and was puzzled. "Jack, why are you so upset about it?"
Jack looked down at his hands, folded tightly in his lap. "I don't know," he said quietly. "I think… I think it's always been a dream of mine to have a baby to love, and who better than my best friend to have it? I mean, I missed so much with Elliot, not even knowing he existed…and I guess… I just… I want someone to love!"
This confession tumbled out in a mix of emotion and embarrassment. Jack looked away.
Will and Grace were absolutely touched. "Oh, Jack," Will said, reaching out to hug his best friend. "Maybe you should talk to Karen. I mean… she should know how you feel."
Jack sniffed. "I think I might have ruined it. I got so angry at her, Will. I don't even know why, but I just… I told her she could forget about ever seeing me again if she gets rid of this baby."
"Wow. Harsh," Grace said sympathetically. "Jack, you really need to talk to her, you know that? She loves you, Jack. She really does, and I don't think it's worth destroying your friendship over this. Besides," she added. "I don't think she'll have the heart to get rid of this baby. It's her last link to Stan, you know?"
"Assuming Stan's the father," Will said, and Grace swatted him.
"Most likely he is," Jack said. "But what if that's the reason she doesn't want it?"
"That's impossible," Will said. "She did love Stan."
The three of them sat in silence for a long time. "Well," Jack said, getting up. "I'm going to bed."
"Jack." Grace grabbed his wrist. "Talk to Karen."
Jack pulled free from her grip. "I'm going to bed."
Grace fell back on Will's lap. "This sucks."
Will stroked her hair. "Yeah. It does. I just hope Jack manages to convince her."
"Me too." Grace sat up. "I'm exhausted. I'm going to bed."
Will followed her out the door and placed a kiss on her lips. "G'night."
"Night." Grace padded down the hall to her room.
Will went the other way and the lights went off five minutes later.
* * * *
Jack lay in his bed, staring up at the ceiling. The dim light formed shadows, melting and playing across the dull surface, and he squeezed his eyes shut. He couldn't sleep, not with this on his mind.
His CD player was no help, blasting Cher at an inhuman volume. It couldn't distract him. So he rolled over and settled himself on his stomach, chin resting in his pillows.
Two seconds later he switched positions. He remembered the three nights he'd spent with Karen in "prison," locked in Rosario's room. It had been oddly comforting to have that small weight and warmth in his arms and next to him at night. He felt that gap acutely now.
Finally, with a frustrated hiss of breath between his teeth and a roll of his eyes, he got out of bed and sneaked down the hall towards Karen's room. He knocked, but there was no answer. Opening the door ever so slowly, he peeked in. It was dark, but there was moonlight coming in from the window.
He came in and crouched in front of the bed where Karen was asleep, tearstains still evident. He watched her sleep, pushing a stray lock of hair from her face. She looked so uncommonly beautiful just laying there; Jack felt a pull at his heart. "Oh, Karen," he whispered. "How do you do this to me?"
She rolled over, leaving a big space in the bed. Jack stayed there for a moment, frozen, and decided to seize the moment. Carefully, very carefully so as not to wake her, he slid into the bed next to her and pulled the covers over himself. Karen rolled back over, sighing in her sleep, and put an arm around him, leaning her head on his chest.
Jack tensed for a moment, and then relaxed, sliding her into his embrace. Leaning his chin on the top of her head, he blinked hard against hot tears that suddenly and inexplicably welled up in his eyes.
He felt Karen move, and looked down. Her eyes were open. "Jack?"
"Hi." Jack didn't know what else to say as he fought to control his brimming eyes.
Karen frowned sleepily. "What are you doing in here?"
"I couldn't sleep," Jack whispered. "Are you all right?"
Karen seemed to notice where she was lying and looked puzzled. "Yeah." Her voice was slow and deep from sleep, and Jack found this new tone strikingly sexy.
"I'm sorry," he whispered a moment later. Karen tilted her head to look up at him.
"You're crying," she said softly, reaching up to wipe away the stray tears.
Jack turned his head and sniffed. "I'm okay." He rubbed his eyes furiously. "I just… I had to apologize."
Karen shifted a little to allow for her hands to close inside his. "It's okay."
"Are you very angry?" Jack's eyes seemed to glow, liquid blue in the half-light of the moon.
"No," Karen said. "Not angry." She pushed her hair out of her face. "Just a little scared."
Jack looked down at her. "Why?"
"I thought about what you said," Karen admitted. "And you're right. You're always right." She looked up into his eyes. "I can't get rid of this baby. It's my last link to Stan."
Jack was startled. It was exactly like Grace had said. "So… so you're keeping it?" he asked, daring to hope.
Karen was silent for a long moment. "Yeah."
Jack felt a rising happiness that choked his throat and made him smile wider than he had ever smiled before. He embraced Karen, and, in a moment of spontaneity… kissed her right on the lips.
It was a celebration as much as a turning point.
* * * *
Back on land, Karen, Will, Grace, Jack, and Rosario all stepped gratefully back onto the pier. "Home at last," Rosario said. "Let's get the limo."
"Hey, hey," Karen said. "Why so eager? Get me a sandwich, and step on it."
Rosario threw Karen a dirty look. "Lady, I carried your two-ton husband's ashes across an entire ocean, you better appreciate me before I…"
"You better appreciate your paycheck!" Karen cut her off. "Now go."
"One of these days, I'm going to poison your sick ass," Rosario muttered as she turned to go.
"You can't kill me, but thank you!" Karen called after her retreating figure. "Sweet of you. Thanks, Rosie!"
"Of course." Rosario gave her boss a big smile.
"Isn't she wonderful?" Karen asked Jack. He smiled, silently squeezing her hand.
"She sure is."
Will looked questioningly over at Jack, and Jack nodded discreetly. Will grinned at Grace, and they knew the problem was solved.
Rosario came back a few minutes later with a huge sandwich. Karen picked it apart as the limo hissed down the street towards the penthouse. Jack leaned over and stole a piece of lettuce from the wax paper wrapping. "Mm," he said. "Mayonnaise."
The limo stopped first in front of Will's apartment, and Driver hauled Will's suitcase to the door. "Thanks, Karen!" Will called from the door, waving.
Karen waved back. They drove further downtown to Grace and Leo's apartment, and Grace got out with explicit instructions to Jack to "take care of Karen."
Karen looked puzzled. "Why did she say that?"
Jack shrugged. "No clue," he fibbed as Driver shut the door. "Let's get back to the house."
Driver swung around and headed back to the Walker penthouse. Jack wasn't planning on going home until that evening. Karen had promised to take a pregnancy test that day.
Rosario came back into the house, having been ordered by Karen to pick up two tests, holding a Walgreen's bag. "Here's your things," she said, handing them to Karen, who was collapsed on Rosario's bed.
"Thanks, Ro-Ro," Karen said. She dumped the two tests onto the bed and tossed one to Jack.
"Here we go, poodle," she said, and Jack led her by the hand into the bathroom.
Five minutes later they were seated back on the bed, staring at the two sticks and an egg timer set of two minutes. "What a flashback," Karen sighed.
"Yeah, but this time it's only two minutes," Jack said. He squeezed her hand. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah," Karen said. "It's okay, Jack, it really is."
They spent those two minutes in silence, and the timer sent a chill through Karen. She and Jack picked up the tests at the same time.
"Well, nothing on mine," Jack said. "Again… I'm a little disappointed. Karen?"
Karen had a small smile on her face. "It's blue." She sat down on the bed, one hand on her abdomen. "It's blue."
"See?" Jack said, sitting down beside her, one arm around her waist. "Oh, Kare, I'm so excited."
Karen put the test down on the nightstand. "You know what? Me too."
Rosario came back in. "So?"
"Blue," Karen said.
Rosario smiled. "Santa Maria, you are capable of love." She hugged Karen, who tensed.
"Easy on the affection," she said. "Too much is harmful to my health."
Jack lay back on the bed. "I'm going to be a father!"
Karen looked at him and laughed. "It's Stan's kid."
Jack sat up, blue eyes wide. "So? As far as I'm concerned it's mine." He giggled in excitement. "Mine and yours, of course."
"Mine too!" Rosario said.
"Hey, hey, back off," Karen said. "I don't want my baby speaking foreign."
Rosario looked insulted. "Shut up, Cruella."
Karen looked affronted, but Jack's hand on her stomach distracted her. "Come and knock on our door," Jack sang, leaning his nose against her belly. "We've been waiting for… you." He pressed a finger gently against her stomach. "And the thing, I don't know the words… three's company too!"
Rosario rolled her eyes and grinned. "I'll leave you two alone." She went out, still smiling from excitement. A baby!
* * * *
Karen came sailing into the work the next day long about eleven thirty. Grace looked up from her blueprints and down at her watch. "Wow," she said. "You're early."
"And that blouse is horrible," Karen replied. "Listen, Gracie, I gotta talk to you."
"Okay." Grace put down her pen. "What's new?" She had a feeling she knew what was coming.
"Well, remember how was I was a little under the weather on the boat?" Karen said, opening the one issue of Vogue on her desk. "Well it turns out I've got a bun in the oven, and I need some time off."
Grace smiled. "Really? Karen, are you serious?"
"Quite." Karen looked up at her.
"That's wonderful!" Grace said. Think how much work I'll be able to get done, she thought privately, and smiled. "You can do whatever you need to, Karen."
Karen sighed. "Good. Because right now I have absolutely no clue how to deal with this."
Grace looked sympathetically at her friend. "Mind-boggling, isn't it?"
"Completely."
"Well, have you found a doctor yet?"
Karen groaned. "God, how many more specialists do I need?"
"Well, you do need an obstetrician." Grace opened her phone book. "I have one right here."
"Why?" Karen asked. "You're not pregnant."
"Yeah, my mother gave me the number. Wishful thinking." Grace rolled her eyes. "Her name is Doctor Coburg. She's great."
Karen took the little slip of paper and put it into her purse. "Thanks."
"No problem."
Jack came sailing in two minutes later. "Morning, Mama," he greeted his best friend. "And hello, Auntie Grace."
"Hello, Uncle Jack," Grace said, grinning.
"No," Jack said. "Papa Jack."
Grace looked at Karen. "Did you know about this?"
Karen smiled. "Little Jackie's decided he's going to be this kid's father."
"Aw," Grace said. "You are too cute."
Jack grinned, framing his face with his hands. "You know it as well as I do." He turned to Karen. "Feel like lunch?"
"Are you kidding?" Karen said. "I'm starving."
"You're going to start eating for two," Grace said. "And bring me back a salad."
Karen looked at Grace in surprise. "Excuse me?"
"Well, if you're going to go sailing out, I want something too."
Jack stepped in. "Greek salad? Caesar?"
"Caesar. And don't skimp on the croutons." Grace went back to her blueprints. "Thanks, you're a doll."
"Again," Jack said. "You know it as well as I do." He disappeared behind Karen out the door.
"I want to check out this doctor," Karen said as they went down the street. "She's six blocks from here."
"What doctor?" Jack asked, taking the slip of paper and reading it. "An OB-GYN?"
"Yeah. Apparently I need one," Karen said. "Honestly. I already have half of New York Medical on me, I don't need anyone else."
Jack shrugged. "Might as well."
The office was spacious and bright, and Karen found she didn't mind it as much. Dr. Coburg herself came out to talk to them, and was happy to have Karen as a patient. She penciled her in immediately for an appointment the next week.
* * * *
Karen was exhausted. She slumped on the sofa at Will's apartment and sighed. Grace and Jack were hunting through Will's CDs for something good, and Will was standing over a hot stove, cooking dinner.
"You all right?" he asked Karen.
"Yeah." Karen yawned. "Tired." Not to mention the fact that she'd been sick all day. It was getting to her, this morning sickness business. And on top of that the doctor had strictly forbidden and kind of liquor except one small glass of red wine a day. Her friends were adhering firmly to this rule, and Rosario had gotten rid of all the liquor in the house, a monumental task, seeing as Karen had not only gallons of it in plain sight, but numerous hidden bottles in God knows how many places.
Her stomach had begun to swell. Four months in and she felt like she'd been pregnant for years. She'd had to restock her wardrobe with maternity clothes, and Barney's was not kind to pregnant women. There was a very tiny maternity section and Karen was quickly bored of the limited selection. And she no longer tolerated stiletto heels. She swore by chunk heels and flats now, much to her dismay. Previously she had been able to reach Jack's nose without even stretching. Now it was work. Stupid change, she knew, but it unnerved her nonetheless.
Grace and Will were ecstatic at the prospect of the baby, and Karen had asked them to be the godparents. Jack had insisted, and in the end she had agreed.
"All right," Karen said, looking at the clock. "I have an appointment, so I'll be right back."
"Are you going to the obstetrician?" Jack asked.
"Yes."
"I'm coming." Jack abandoned his rummaging through the CDs and pulled his coat off the rack.
"Why?"
"Because," Jack said. "You never let me come with you before, and I have rights too, you know."
"It's not your child!" Karen said.
"But you are my best friend. Now go." Jack ushered her out the door.
Once again in the waiting room Karen sat by the office door.
"Mrs. Walker?" Dr. Coburg came out. "I'm ready to see you."
Jack followed Karen down the hallway into the examining room. "Well, well, is this the father?" Dr. Coburg asked, smiling at Jack.
"Yes," Jack said before Karen could answer.
"Nice to meet you, Mr. Walker." Dr. Coburg shook his hand.
"Oh. No," Jack said. "My name's Jack McFarland. Stan… unfortunately Stan passed away, so I'm filling in for him."
"Oh. I'm very sorry to hear that," Dr. Coburg squeezed Karen's hand, and Karen looked away. "Let's get down to business, then, shall we?"
Karen made Jack look away as the doctor examined her. "I want to take a quick sonogram," the doctor said. "Just to see how the baby's doing. Do you want to know the sex of the baby?"
Karen stopped. She hadn't thought of that. She looked at Jack. Jack nodded vigorously. "Most definitely," he said, and Karen looked at the doctor.
"Well," she said, a smile coming to her face. "You heard the man."
The doctor laughed. A few moments later the screen of the sonogram machine lit up with a clear, 3D view of the baby. Jack took Karen's hand. As the baby moved, he squeezed her hand.
Then the baby's hand floated across the screen in an almost-greeting, and Jack felt Karen tense up. "Look," she whispered.
"The baby looks great," Dr. Coburg said, smiling. "And you have yourselves a baby girl."
"Oh, good," Jack said. "Now I have a set. A boy and a girl."
"Do you guys have any names?" Dr. Coburg set about wiping off the gel and cleaning everything up.
Karen thought for a moment. "Emmaline is one I love."
"I like Jacqueline," Jack said slyly, eliciting a laugh from the doctor.
"Well, you think about it," she said. "I'd love to hear any ideas."
Jack helped Karen off the table and back onto her feet. "So when am I due?" Karen asked.
"Well," the doctor said, checking her chart. "Since it's July now, and you're four months in… it looks like you're due around Christmas Eve."
"Cool!" Jack said. "I've always wanted a Christmas birthday."
The doctor scheduled Karen for a visit the next week and Jack and Karen headed out into the sunset.
* * * *
"Okay, one thing you have to do is sign up for Lamaze classes," Grace said over dinner.
"Why?" Karen asked. "I know how to breathe."
"It's more than that," Will said. "It teaches you a little more about the birthing process."
"Eugh," Karen said. "It's bad enough this thing is coming out of me. Now I have to learn about the horror?"
"Pretty much," Will replied.
"I'll go with you tomorrow," Grace offered.
"Fine, fine," Karen conceded. "I'll try this Lamaze thing. But you can't make me stay if I hate it." She pointed a finger at Grace.
"You got it," Grace agreed. "If you hate it, you can leave."
Karen cut another piece of Will's marinated chicken and fed it to Jack, who looked for all the world like an adoring puppy.
"Jack, you can feed yourself," Will said.
"No," Grace shushed Will. "It's the maternal instincts thing."
Will looked dubiously at her. "Maternal? Karen? I don't think so."
"Yes!" Grace said. "It's a part of pregnancy. Hormonal changes happen and you go through what's called a nesting phase, where you anticipate the birth you try to make everything perfect for the baby. You get emotional and protective and you nurture whatever happens to be closest to you."
Will and Grace looked almost as if they were at a zoo, observing some curious phenomenon, and indeed it was. Karen was taking care of someone with no thought for herself. "Fascinating," Will murmured, sounding uncannily like Mr. Spock.
Grace laughed.
* * * *
The nurse looked up as Karen and Grace entered the room. "We want to sign up for Lamaze classes," Grace said, pointing to Karen, who looked embarrassed.
"No problem," the nurse replied. "Here are the forms, and you can go look at the class that's already going on." She pointed down to the hall to a set of double doors painted pink and blue with little handprints. Karen didn't move until Grace took her by the wrist and pulled her down the hall.
The room was peacefully quiet, gently lit, and there were about twelve women sitting in a circle, husbands and boyfriends behind them, practicing various breathing techniques.
"It's important to let your husbands help you," the nurse-instructor said. "No matter how well you tolerate pain, you can always use a little support. And of course, daddies want to see their babies too."
Karen stopped in the doorway. "What's wrong?" Grace said from behind her. "Karen, go in."
"No," Karen said, drawing back out. "I can't."
"Why not?" Grace asked.
Karen leaned against the wall. "I just can't."
Grace peeked in and saw the big whiteboard displaying the words "Daddies And Pregnancy." She knew then, looking at the circle of women and men, why Karen was upset. "Oh, Karen."
Karen sighed. "Let's just go home."
"No," Grace said. "Karen, you need this class. I'll go in with you. I'll be right there, I promise."
Karen shut her eyes and took a deep breath. "Fine." She opened the door and slunk into a corner, trying to avoid everyone's eyes.
"Hello," the nurse said, stopping her narrative. "You must be new."
Grace followed Karen inside. "Nice to meet you," the nurse came over. "And you are?"
"Karen Walker," Karen muttered.
"Grace Adler," Grace said. She noticed everyone eyeing them curiously.
"Well, it's always nice to have new people. Guys, let's welcome two new parents to the class."
The women clapped. "Hi, Karen!" one of them stuck out a hand. "I'm Tammy, and this is my husband Bill."
Karen managed a perfunctory smile. "Hi."
"So how long have you guys been together?" another woman asked.
"Oh," Grace said, turning a brilliant red. "We're not… we're not a couple."
Karen shook her head. Whereas normally she would have embarrassed the hell out of Grace and told everyone that they indeed were, she was too worn out to do that. "My husband's dead, and this is my best friend."
Grace looked surprised. "Yeah. Yeah, that's me, the best friend," she said, hiding a smile.
"Oh," the women chorused in sympathy. "Sorry, Karen."
"Well, let's get back to work, shall we?"
Karen felt ridiculous, leaning against Grace, her stomach not as large as any of the other women. She was only four months in, but as Grace had said, it served to be prepared. They went over all the typical Lamaze techniques. Karen did it only half-heartedly, feeling like an idiot, whereas the rest of the women were breathing away. "Come on, Karen," Grace whispered. "We look like idiots."
"You?" Karen hissed back. "Who's on the floor here?" She sat up. "Forget it, Grace."
The nurse looked up. "Are you all right?"
"We have to leave," Karen lied. "I have an appointment." She got to her feet awkwardly and rushed out the door, Grace trailing behind, making apologies to the nurse.
"Karen, what the hell is wrong with you?" Grace hissed once the door was shut.
"Grace, get off my back," Karen said. "I can't do this."
"Why not?" Grace was furious. "This is for your health!"
Karen left her standing there. Grace followed her. "Karen, what's the matter?"
"Nothing, okay?" Karen sat down heavily in the limo. "I need a drink."
"Well that's out of the question so you might as well tell me what the hell is going on." Grace sat down across from her.
"Not now," Karen said. "Just leave me alone."
The limo glided along the streets and pulled up in front of Grace's building. Karen went up with her to leave a few last-minute papers with Will.
Jack was sprawled on the sofa when they opened the door. He sat up. "Well hey, ladies," he said, scooting over so that Karen could sit. Grace looked extremely pissed off.
"What's going on?" he asked. "I'm getting a vibe."
"Ask Karen," Grace said. "I'm going to the store. Where's Will?"
"Work." Jack wiggled his feet at her.
Grace nodded and went out the door.
Only then did Karen allow herself to slump down in the seat and sigh.
"What's going on?" Jack asked her.
"Grace took to me to a Lamaze class," Karen whispered.
"So?" Jack asked. "What's wrong with that?"
Karen looked up at him with the saddest, emptiest expression he had ever seen. "They all had husbands and boyfriends. I mean, you should have seen them, I thought I was going to die of embarrassment." Her voice grew strained with tears. "You should have seen it."
Jack put one arm around her and that seemed to break whatever brittle control she had managed over her emotions. She started to cry for the first time in Jack's memory. "It's not fair," she managed. "I—I tried so hard to be h-happy for this b-baby and I can't anym-more!"
"I know, I know," Jack rocked her a little. "Karen, it's okay to be upset."
"No it's not!" Karen cried. "I should be happy! And I can't be!" Her hands were clenched tight in her lap. "Jack, I'm going to be totally alone raising this baby, do you know that?"
"What?" Jack looked at her.
"She's not going to have a father or anything!" Karen looked away. "But if Stan was alive I wouldn't be in this mess."
"Kare! The baby's going to have a daddy." Jack looked extremely earnest as he said this, taking her hands in his. "Me."
Karen looked at him, the blue eyes, the beautiful boyish face, the smile… and she leaned her forehead against his. Jack would make it okay. He always did.
Jack kissed his best friend on the forehead. "Now no more tears," he said. "We have planning to do."
Karen looked up. "What?"
"We need names! You need to decorate a room for a nursery! We need clothes and toys and everything!" Jack waved a steno pad in the air. "Let's go, Karen!"
Karen smiled. "Jack."
"I'm serious." Jack plopped down next to her. "Now. I say ask Grace to design the nursery, and we're going to Barney's for the clothes. That leaves… names."
"Oh, lord." Karen rolled her eyes, grinning. "I don't know."
"I still like Jacqueline," Jack said.
"And I still like Emmaline," Karen said.
"So combine them. Make it Jacqueline Emma." Jack wrote it down on the paper.
Karen thought about it. "It's cute. What about Megan?"
Jack thought. "Yeah." He wrote that down too. "Or Shawna?"
"Yeah, yeah!" Karen was starting to get excited. "Megan Shawna."
Jack scribbled furiously. "Okay, okay," he said. "Any more?"
Karen sat back, looking at her best friend. "No." She smiled at him. "I'm tired."
* * * *
The next week, Karen was sitting at her desk in Grace's office. Grace glanced at the clock. "Karen, it's two o' clock. Shouldn't you be at the hospital?"
"I've been throwing up all week, so no." Karen didn't look up from her magazine.
"Karen, you have a class." Grace put her fabric samples down.
"I'm not going back there!" Karen said, slamming the magazine shut. "It was humiliating."
Jack opened the door slowly. "Karen?"
She turned around. "What?"
"Come on, I thought we were going to lunch." Jack didn't move from the doorway.
"Karen has a Lamaze class right now," Grace put in.
"Oh," Jack said. "Well, why don't I take you, and then we'll go eat?"
Grace looked at Karen. "Problem solved, Karen. There's your husband or boyfriend right there."
Karen looked at Jack, who grinned devilishly at her. "C'mon, wife, let's go."
Karen got up slowly, awkwardly, trying to maneuver around her belly, which was rapidly getting larger. "Okay, fine."
The hospital was just as bright as she remembered it, and the room full of the same women. This time, though, they all shot admiring looks at Jack when he walked into the room.
"You're lucky." A woman named Denise leaned over and whispered to Karen. "I wish I'd been able to find a boyfriend that fast after my divorce."
Karen smiled, glad that he was there. She didn't bother to correct the boyfriend part.
"Okay, girls!" The nurse, Natalie, was standing in front of the room. "Here we go. Today's topic: Sex during pregnancy."
Jack squeezed Karen's shoulders. "Most definitely," he whispered right into her ear, sending a little shiver down her spine. She giggled.
"Just kidding," Natalie said. "Today deals with pain management. So I want everyone to get up."
There was a long moment while everyone managed to get to their feet. Karen held out her hands to Jack. "Pull, honey."
"Now. Contractions are less than comfortable, but there are ways to ease the pain," Natalie began. "And here's a major one. Arms up around your husband's neck, and lean. Support them, boys. Here we go. Rock side to side." The nurse kept up a constant stream of instructions. "Rock the hips, side to side, like a cradle."
Karen was put in mind of the night on the boat a few months ago when she and Jack had danced to Sinatra music. She relaxed immediately. "Wow," she murmured. "I'm going to have to keep you with me when the baby comes."
Jack laughed softly, a deep rumble Karen remembered well. "I'll be there. Just a few more months, Kare."
* * * *
"I refuse to be pregnant any longer!" Karen stormed out of her bedroom and into the living room, startling Rosario, who was dusting the table by the door. She stood there, fuming, stomach swelled to a huge size in front of her. It looked as if she was hiding an enormous beach ball underneath her dress. It also looked uncomfortable. Karen had never been particularly tall or large, and so the pregnant belly looked disproportionately oversized on her tiny frame.
"Live with it. I did it twice," Rosario said. "It's going to be over soon. It's Christmas Eve."
Karen groaned. "I hate this."
"Cheer up, lady; the kids are going to arrive soon." Rosario put down the duster and pulled on a Santa hat. "Spread some joy, will you?"
Karen laughed at her hat. "You look ridiculous."
"Yeah, Merry Christmas to you, too." Rosario went out of the room.
The doorbell rang. Karen didn't move. It rang again. Karen didn't move. "Aren't you going to get that?" she yelled to Rosario, who came wearily back in and opened the door.
"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" Grace, Will, and Jack were standing at the door, laden with presents and decorations. Grace had holly in her hair, but didn't seem to notice.
"Ay, come in," Rosario said.
"Here," Jack said, handing her a present with a smile. "For my ex-wife."
Rosario grinned. "Thanks, mami."
The four of them went into the living room, leaving Rosario to open her present in the foyer.
"Okay," Will said. "Time for presents."
Jack clapped his hands and wiggled in his seat. "I love this part," he said to Karen, who giggled a little in spite of her discomfort.
Grace was surrounded by boxes. "Ah, you Gentiles are so generous," she said, surveying the heap. "I tell you, Chanukah is nothing without the hype of Christmas."
Will laughed. "Okay. Three…two…one… open 'em!"
A frenzy of paper tearing and bow-flying ensued. Jack emerged first from a huge pile of wrapping paper, holding a new sweater from Will.
"Wee!" he exclaimed. "Thanks, Will."
Will grinned from underneath an oversized bow Grace had plopped onto his head. Karen pushed the remains of Jack's presents out of the way and held up a small box. "To my lovely Karen. Love, your poodle," she read, and opened the box. Inside was a small heart-shaped locket. She drew in a sharp breath as she pulled it out, on a long thin silver chain. It unfolded to four different sections, so that it resembled a flower. Inside was a picture of Jack, a picture of her, and a picture of them together. The last space was engraved with the word "baby." He had left a space for a picture of the baby. Karen was speechless.
She looked up to see Jack looking anxiously at her. "Is it fabulous?" he asked timidly.
"Oh, Jack," Karen said. "It's fabulous."
Her other presents were mostly baby clothes. All the things Grace had bought were classic Pooh. Karen thought she had never seen anything so cute. Hats, tiny socks, little dresses and jumpers, bibs, and toys were scattered around her on the sofa when she was done. A menagerie of pink. She was actually thrilled. Will's present turned out to be a crib, which he wheeled in from outside after making Karen close her eyes. The crib was the one thing she hadn't gotten for the nursery. When she had asked Grace to decorate it, they hadn't found the perfect crib to match the pink-and-white scheme. But Will had. And there it was, sitting in front of her, with a beautiful set of pink bunting and sheets.
Karen felt herself choke up and was disgusted with herself. "Wilma," she gasped. "It's beautiful."
"It's a work of art," Grace said, admiring it. "Wow, I wish I had one of these. That's one lucky baby."
They rearranged themselves on the sofas.
"Tonight," Grace announced. "Is all about us."
"I'm due tonight," Karen reminded them.
"Oh yeah," Will said. "I completely forgot."
Karen threw him a dirty look. "How could you? I'm a hideously large beach ball with legs and you forget?"
Jack put an arm around her. "It's okay, Kare, we're all going to be here."
Karen got up off the sofa. "I can't believe you," she fumed at all of them. "All you think about is the holidays. Never mind me with my huge ass and stomach that are never going to go away. Never mind that I'm miserable! No, never mind that!" Her voice rose with every word. "No, it's only Karen! She'll get over herself, the drunken lush! Well, fu—oh my god." She interrupted herself as she bent double suddenly. "Ow."
It was like slow motion. Jack leapt up and caught Karen just before she hit the floor, and Will ran for the phone. Grace knelt down in front of Karen, using whatever was handy to mop up the mess from the water breaking. Karen clutched at Jack's arm, squeezing with all her strength against the sudden blast of pain. Jack had turned white all of a sudden, as if he realized what she was going through. He sat there almost in shock.
"The doctor says not to panic," Will reported, hanging up the phone. "Since it's her first baby, it should be a while."
"Get me to the hospital," Karen hissed at Jack, gritting her teeth. "Get me to the goddamn hospital."
"It's okay, Karen," Jack said. "I'm here. We're gonna get you to the limo."
"Dios mio," Rosario came in and got to her knees in front of Karen. "Don't panic, Miss Karen. I know what to do."
"You get the hell away from me!" Karen yelled. At the same time she gripped Rosario's collar, preventing her from going anywhere.
"Just breathe." Rosario almost looked like a grandmother, coaxing Karen through the breathing exercises.
The limo pulled up outside, and everyone clamored to help Karen to her feet and out to the car.
Jack finally solved the problem by scooping his best friend up into his arms and, after a moment to adjust the unexpected weight, hurried her outside. Karen buried her face in his neck, arms tight about him. Driver went at breakneck speed and arrived at the hospital in eight minutes flat. Karen, who was more scared than anything, wouldn't let go of Jack and insisted that he be brought back with her to her room. She refused to put on the hospital gown until Jack assured her that he would hold her clothes and that although the gown was plain cotton, you couldn't deliver a baby in cashmere and silk. Karen gave in and slid the garment on, wincing as if it burned. Jack folded her clothes and put them on a chair.
"It's going to be hours," she groaned. "Why me?"
Will, Grace, and Rosario came quietly into the room. "Hey, Karen, how're you?" Will asked. He was holding a big bouquet of roses. "These are for you."
Karen pushed herself into a sitting position. "Aw, thank you, Wilma." She accepted his kiss on her forehead as well.
"We're so excited," Grace said.
"This brings back so many memories," Rosario said, looking around at the hospital room. "But in El Salvador we have a smaller hospital."
Karen leaned into the pillows, handing the roses to Rosario to be put away. The doctor came in to examine Karen, and everyone politely left the room. Every so often a groan of pain could be heard from the room, and Jack seemed to tense up every time. He stood right at the door to be the first one back in when the doctor was done.
Once they were back inside, the doctor came back with an anesthesiologist. "Time for relief," Dr. Coburg announced. "Here's an epidural."
"Oh thank god," Karen gasped. Jack helped her sit up, but at the sight of the evilly long needle, both he and Grace fled the room.
Will, left to shake his head at his friends, took Karen's hand then and let her squeeze it as hard as she needed as the doctor inserted the needle. "Ow, oh, lord," Karen groaned. "How long is that needle?"
"Almost done, Karen," Dr. Coburg said. "One more minute."
Even Will was a little faint at the sight of that thing going into his friend. He winced.
"Okay, all done," the anesthesiologist said. "You can lay down again, hon."
Karen gripped Will's hand and he helped her get comfortable.
Grace peeked back into the room. "Is it over? Is that hideous long evil needle gone?"
"Yes, for God's sake," Karen called from the bed. "Come back. Where's Jack?"
"Right here," Jack said, running in. "I'm right here." He came over to the bed. "How are you?"
Rosario settled herself in a chair with a crochet needle and a big patch of pink cloth. It had scalloped edges and the stitches were precise and tight. Rosario had been crocheting and knitting for many years, and it was exciting to have a baby to spoil.
Hours passed this way, with conversations and intermittent examinations, renewals of the epidural, and Grace looked up to see that it was nearly ten o' clock at night. "Why don't you go get something to eat?" Karen suggested, seeing Grace's glance at the clock. "Go ahead, I'll be fine."
Jack, however, refused to leave, and sent Grace with a request for a Pepsi and a bag of M&Ms. "Energy food," he said to Karen.
"Jack, are you sure you don't want to eat?" Karen asked. "I'll be all right."
Even Rosario had gone to eat. "No," Jack said. "I'm not really that hungry. I'm too excited. I'm going to see my baby!"
Karen sighed a little. "Why do you keep calling it your baby?"
"Because it is," Jack said. "Stan isn't here, and I love you, and I'll be the closest thing to a daddy this baby will ever have. I know what it's like to live wondering who your father really is. I don't want her to do that."
Karen let him take her hand, twining her fingers in his. "I don't think any child should be without a father in their life, even if it's just the next best thing and not their real father." He grinned at her. "Besides. I'm going to teach her to play piano, and sing, and dance, and cook. I have big plans for this little gal."
Karen was touched. "Jackie, you… you really had this all planned?"
"Since the moment I found out you were really pregnant," Jack replied.
"Even I wasn't this excited," Karen said. "But I'm glad someone was." She put one hand on her enormously large belly, drawing circles with her fingers. "Epidural's wearing off."
"Does it hurt?" Jack was alert immediately. "Do you want a nurse?"
"No, no," Karen stopped him. "It's okay." She started attempting Lamaze, but Jack could see that it was getting difficult. "Why didn't you say something earlier?"
"I'm fine," Karen said.
At that moment a nurse walked in. "Thank god. Her epidural's worn off."
"Okay, no reason to panic," the nurse said, seeing Jack's slightly widened eyes and frightened expression. "Do you want another one?"
Karen thought about it. "In a few minutes. I'll buzz you."
The nurse left, with instructions to push the call button the minute she needed anything. Karen sat up. "Help me," she said to Jack. Holding out her arms, she wiggled her fingers. Jack pulled her to her feet and Karen linked her arms around his neck. "Remember this?" she asked, rocking from side to side.
"Oh yeah," Jack said. "From Lamaze class." He had continued to go with her at every possible chance he had.
"When somebody loves you…" he sang softly. "It's no good unless she loves you… all the way…"
Again, he had that magic effect, and Karen felt herself relax. "Jack, you are a miracle worker," she murmured.
"I try," he answered.
"Okay, we're back!" Grace announced. She drew the soda and candy from her jacket. "Here ya go."
"Wee! Candy!" Jack reached out over Karen's head.
"Here. Let me go," Karen said, and managed to get back onto the bed. As she lay back down, a blast of pain hit her and she doubled over. The overwhelming urge to push swept her, and she gripped the bed rail. "Karen?" Will went for the call button. "Are you all right?" he asked as he punched the little red button.
"No." That was the one word Karen managed to get out before she nearly screamed in pain.
The nurse came in, but at the sight of Karen, she paged the doctor immediately. Jack, Grace, and Rosario huddled around the bed, trying to calm Karen down. She would have none of it.
The nurse wheeled her into a delivery room, and handed scrubs to all four of them. "Suit up, guys and gals."
Two minutes later, the doctor was in the room, they were all suited up, and Karen was gripping Jack's hand for all she was worth. "Okay," the doctor said.
"Why can't I have another epidural?" Karen hissed at one point.
"Karen, you went into active labor faster than any woman I've ever seen," Dr. Coburg said. "There's no time."
Karen's eyes practically bugged. "What?!"
"I'm sorry." Dr. Coburg was rapidly getting into scrubs. "Let's go, then, shall we?"
"Oh, no, I'm not doing this until I get some medication!" Karen yelled.
"Karen, we can't do anything about it. I'm really sorry, I really am. But I need you to push." The doctor was holding her arms out for gloves.
Karen looked up at the four smiling faces above her. "Come on, Karen, you can do it," Grace encouraged. "We're all here for you."
Karen squeezed Jack's hand and took a deep breath. Jack nearly died as she increased her pressure on his hand. "Ow, ow, ow," he eked out in a high, pained voice.
"Okay, relax."
A few moments later Jack's fingers turned purple from being squeezed. "…eight, nine, ten," he managed over the pain.
"Ow!" Karen yelled more out of fear than pain. "Help me."
"Another one." This time Jack squeezed her hand back. "Keep going." The doctor's voice rose a little. "One or two more, Karen, I can see the baby."
It was a frenzied two more minutes as the baby raised an unholy noise of indignation at the cold world into which it had been thrust. Everyone was crying, Karen still holding Jack's hand.
"Six pounds, eight ounces," the doctor announced, swaddling the squalling baby and handing her to Karen, who was barely able to sit up. "Merry Christmas, mama."
"Hi, baby!" Everyone gathered around the baby, and she quieted down. She opened her eyes and everyone gasped. They were the most strikingly blue color they had ever seen.
"Where did those eyes come from?" Grace asked reverently.
"I don't know," Karen replied, looking down in sheer awe at this tiny person. "Stan never had those blue eyes."
All eyes turned to Jack, who was admiring the little girl. "She has your eyes, poodle," Karen said.
"Isn't it cool?" Jack said. "She's beautiful, just like her mommy."
* * * *
Three Years Later…
"Daddy!" Jacqueline Emma Walker came running into the front of the house, pursued by her mother. This little dark-haired dynamo was well out of poor Karen's reach, heading straight for Jack.
"Hey, baby girl!" Jack came in and scooped Jacqueline off her feet. "How's my little girl? Hey, Karen." He greeted his best friend, who looked completely exhausted.
"How are you?" Karen asked, leaning against the table to catch her breath.
"Pretty good. I had an audition," Jack answered. "Need anything?"
Jacqueline bounced in Jack's arms. "Daddy, I want ice cream." She was remarkably articulate for her two years, and spoke in complete sentences.
"Why? Has mommy been depriving you of ice cream?" Jack winked at Karen.
"What's depwive?" Jacqueline looked curiously at him, head titled quizzically, looking for all the world like her mother.
"Jackie, did you leave your blanket here?" Rosario's voice came in from the other room.
Jacqueline laughed as Rosario came in with the pink blanket she'd been crocheting the night of the birth. "What's it called?" Rosario held the blanket out of Jacqueline's reach.
"Umm… una manta," Jacqueline scrunched up her face.
"You're teaching her Spanish?" Jack asked.
"Indeed I am," Rosario said. She pointed to the table. "What's this?"
"Mesa."
"Good. This?" She pointed to the door.
"Puerta."
"Good. How about this?" she pointed to Jack and Karen.
"That's my mommy and my daddy," Jacqueline said.
Jack handed Jacqueline to Karen. "Is Jack your real daddy?" Rosario asked, and Jacqueline shook her head vigorously.
They had explained to her a month or so ago that her real daddy wasn't alive anymore, but that Jack wanted to be like her daddy. And of course, Jacqueline accepted him right away. "C'mon, Princess, we're going to go see Uncle Will and Aunt Grace and Uncle Leo," Jack said. Karen followed them out the door. "They invited us for dinner."
Karen got her coat and Rosario handed her a jacket for Jacqueline. "Have fun."
Karen watched Jack spin her daughter round and heard their delighted laughter. "I think we will," she said, and headed out the door.