Resident Evil pasts: The stories of yesterday.
Chapter 1: The Redfields.1988
Chris Redfield was packing his bags to leave for STARS training as Claire was getting ready to sabotage the brakes on their neighbors car.
"Chris, where are you going?" asked Claire.
"I'm going to join S.T.A.R.S.!" said Chris.
"What's S.T.A.R.S.? asked Claire.
"I think it means "Slightly Trained Awesome Retarded Stargazers", you know, the astronomical stuff," said Chris.
"You're going to be an astronomer?"
"Yes, I've always wanted to be an astronomer," said Chris.
"But Chris, when will I see you again?" asked Claire.
"It probably won't be all that long when that's gonna happen, but while I'm away, don't be bad or continue that that 'hobby' of yours," said Chris.
"You mean crank calling the old lady down the street using voice recordings of dad talking to mom before they got married?" asked Claire while laughing.
"Yes, remember last week when the recording was dad's proposal?" asked Chris.
"He's still in the hospital for 3 more weeks after she ran him over with her car," said Claire.
"If he dies, mom will run away, she told me. If anyone asks, they died in a car crash," said Chris.
"I'm going to follow in dad's footsteps, become a dangerous food and weapons tester," said Claire happily.
"Let's… not do that, why not be like mom?" asked Chris.
"She was a hooker at 15 and became a 'paid' slot-jockey 4 years after, and that's why it's best we just say she's dead," said Claire.
"Well the point is don't be bad," said Chris.
"Okay, now if you'll excuse me, I need to sabotage the Ambrosia's car breaks then poison… I mean spice up Uncle Charles' chicken," explained Claire.
"Claire, when my first S.T.A.R.S. meeting is done, you'd better not be in juvie!" said Chris.
"Don't worry," said Claire.
Chris was walking out the door when Mrs. Redfield nearly slashed him thinking he was a burglar.
"Mom, lay off the booze, that's the twelfth time today," said Chris.
"Sorry, where are you going?" asked Mrs. Redfield.
"I told you 27 times, S.T.A.R.S.," said Chris.
"An astronomer?" asked Mrs. Redfield.
"Ye… Claire are you doing?" asked Chris.
"Nothing," said Claire pointing a rocket launcher at the trajectory of Hawaii, to fulfill her ambition of becoming the dictator of said-state. (No one knows where the hell she got it as a 10 year-old.)
"Whatever," said Chris. (With Claire around, be careful Planet Earth.)