I don't own anything.
Who am I really? I really don't know anymore. For the past 5 years, I've been the good girl, the killer, the enemy, and a victor. Yeah everyone knows me, Johanna Mason, as the victor of the 70th Hunger Games from District 7. Well they don't know the real me and how I came to be.
Ever since I was little, I dreamt of being a princess ever since my parents read me stories about a beautiful girl falling in love with a beast, and how a poor girl went against her parents wishes and went to the ball to meet her prince charming. But I couldn't be one in District 7. Well now I know why my parents used to tell me those stories, to keep me from finding out what is going on in this messed up country named Panem.
I grew up with a lovely family. A stay-at-home mom, who loved to sing old songs that probably came out 100 years ago. My father worked at the lumber factory and he taught me how to cut wood and make paper. My old brother, Kyle, he taught me all different kinds of sports, so I lived most of my life playing football. Everything was perfect, until Kyle was reaped.
I was 10 at the time and he was 15. He was very protective of me, threatening every boy that I talked to that if he hurt me that he would hurt them, but that was gone. I cried everyday he was gone, and even more when that girl Cashmere had killed him and won the games.
I knew that I would get my revenge on her and the Capitol but I didn't know when.
As years passed, I was reaped at 15 just like Kyle, and I knew this was my time to prove to the Capitol that they didn't own me.
I won the games later that year, pretending I was weak and them became a vicious killer.
I came back home and was greeted by my parents and my wonderful boyfriend, Eli, who I missed with all my heart. I had won for him, just to hear his voice again and look into him blue eyes. But nothing was the same. I was different after the games, I was scared and angered. I had killed innocent people that I didn't know, and I couldn't live with myself. I did try to commit suicide from all the nightmares that came to me every night, but Eli was there to help me. He usually came by my house early in the morning and he would help me forget everything that happened. We would go to the meadow that was on the other side of town and stay there as long as we can, just enjoying the peace, nothing to bother us, no one to tell us what to do, I felt safe. Then I left to tour the Districts.
I seriously didn't know why and how I angered President Snow, but as soon as I got home the tour, everything was gone, my parents, my boyfriend, my friends, and my house. I just wanted to know why he did this? Take everything and everyone I loved away from me? And I promised myself that one day, I will get revenge on what he did.
So then the 3rd Quarter Quell came. I was suppose to help that Katniss Everdeen to survive to help the rebellion that I always wanted to start. I was never nice to her and all, maybe because she had everything. She had Peeta, a family, fame, and pretty much everything that I wanted. One you're a victor, everyone tends to forget about you when there's a new one, well everyone still likes Finnick, I seriously can't see what people see in him? Haha, kidding I love him as a brother. During the Games, I was captured by the Capitol.
As soon I was in the headquarters, or where ever they took me, I knew this was my chance to get back at Snow. But I was wrong, I was tortured by water with electric shocks and I almost drowned in a few times, but thank God Peeta was there. He was the only person there that I actually trusted, and talking to him made me happy. But then they changed him. Now everyone of my friends was getting hurt again, and then as soon I get to District 13, Finnick dies. Just why does my life have to be so complicating. And thanks to my new friend Katniss, Snow is dead, and I will sleep peacefully that the killer of the people I love is finally gone.
Sometimes, I just want to see my family, kiss Eli, and just to talk to Kyle again, but I know I can't. And everything that happened in my life has made me who I am today, Johanna Mason.