WARNING: this story is VERY weird! Proceed with caution!
Disclaimer: I do not own any Invader Zim characters and I thankfully do not own Microsoft or AOL.
One day Zim was in his lab and he had nothing better to do.
Zim: Gir, I'm so bored and you're randomness isn't going to help.
Gir: Why don't you go destroy Dib?
Zim: Because he hasn't been trying to prove I'm an alien lately. I wonder what he's up to.
Zim picks up a phone and calls Dib's house but the line is busy.
Zim: Arg! Stupid human communication device!
Gir: Maybe he's on the Internet?
Zim: What is this Internet you speak of?
Gir: It's a place where you do stuff on a computer.
Zim: Hmmm… I have a computer! How do I get Internet on my computer?
Gir: I dunno! Call Microsoft!
Zim picked up the phone and called Microsoft.
Microsoft recording: Hello! Thank you for dialing Microsoft! We have just sent you a Microsoft installation disk. It will cost 5 cents. Have a nice day! … You can hang up now!
Zim hangs up.
Zim: That was easy, I can't wait!
One month later, Zim is still at his phone drooling when the bell rings.
Zim: I'll get it! It must be Microsoft!
Zim answers the door and the pimple boy from the commercial is at the door.
Pimple boy: Here is your Microsoft disk. That'll be 5-
Zim: Don't I know you?
There is a long silence.
Pimple Boy: Please don't tell my mom!
The pimple boy drops the package and runs away.
Zim rips open the package and takes the disk.
Zim: The power of the Internet is in my hands!
Zim puts the disk in his computer and installs everything on it.
Zim: What is this AOL Instant Messenger?
Zim enters a screen name and pushes the sign up button.
A window pops up and says "IamZIM is already taken, please enter a new screen name or enter three words blah blah blah."
Zim: Darn you AOL!
Zim enters a new screen name and clicks sign up.
"You're new screen name is InvdrZIM607. Welcome to AOL!"
Zim: Hmmm… What are chatrooms? Are they rooms in which you 'chat'?
Zim enters a chatroom called 'AloneHome'. Suddenly someone IMs him.
ZimLover0482: hey there Zim! Are you actually Zim from the TV show?
InvdrZIM607: Yes I am ZIM! Who are you?
ZimLover0482: OMG! im ur biggest fan! a/s/l?
InvdrZIM607: what?
ZimLover0482: it stands 4 age/sex/location
InvdrZIM607: I 4got my age but I guess I'd be 16 on earth so I am 16/m/earth u?
ZimLover0482: 16/f/earth, hey u wanna cyber?
InvdrZIM607: What's that?
ZimLover0482 tells him and Zim's eyes get really big.
InvdrZIM607: Umm… ok! I guess
ZimLover0482: Gr8! I'll start!
Back at Dib's house…
Dib: I'm bored of the Internet! I think I'll go spy on Zim again!
Dib sneaks into Zim's base and sees Zim on his computer. Zim is typing and he has a weird look on his face as if he is in a daze.
Dib sneaks even closer to see what Zim's doing. He's chatting. Dib looks at what Zim's typing and then screams.
Zim: Dib! What r u doing here? Get out!
Dib: Ah! I'm out of here!
Dib runs as fast as he can.
ZimLover0482: Zim? u there?
InvdrZIM607: Yeah, Dib just walked in on us
ZimLover0482: oic, did he c anything?
InvdrZIM607: probably
ZimLover0482: lets just 4get about him and get back 2 where we were. It was ur turn.
I TOLD you it was weird! i wrote this like a zillion years ago, but I wanted to see what people thought of it. Yeah, so I really don't care if you review or flame or whatever.