Disclaimer: Tokyo Babylon's by the awesome clamp. I can't be this creative but I can try ^_^v
Random Thoughts
by Yui Miyamoto
Years ago, a memory had faded in the seams...
...and then it haunted me until it became so real I bled from my hands...
...and from my heart.
Chapter 1 - The boy, Nanashi
As I looked around confused, I found a boy looking at me with a peculiar smile that I couldn't understand why he had looked like that. This smile was so inviting, and yet it made me so fearful. It was as if he were going to kill me with that strange grin that looked so surreal: both sincere and not so.
"Do you like sakura?" he had asked me.
"Hai!" I answered excitedly as I nodded my head in confirmation.
It was my favorite. I had such a fascination with this particular tree that we the Japanese had regarded in such high esteem, yet its beauty seemed so dreamlike that it was deadly if it caught you off-guard.
"Cherry blossoms are always as white as snow. Even whiter. But do you know why they are pink?"
Innocently, I shook my head at him.
My heart was beating very fast as if it knew at that moment what he would say...
"It's because of the blood of the dead corpses buried under the sakura." He clenched his fist as if he had blood running through his fingers and seeping to the ground itself.
Filled with sadness, I couldn't hold my feelings inside. It overflowed until I found myself crying for these people.
Blinking with tears in my eyes, I asked, "But aren't they sad?"
Then, that face that was so sure and calm suddenly became surprised as he looked at me.
Why? Why are you looking at me like that? Why must you be surprised at this comment?
Don't...
Don't you feel anything for these dead people?
Nothing at all...?
He then knelt so that we could look at each other on eye-level. "I'll make a bet with you."
My lips were closed in fright and shock. I didn't know what overcame me, but there was this incredible fear and yet inviting seductiveness that drew me even closer to him.
Was it his aura, his look, or he himself? I do not know. All I knew was that he was sucking the life out of me...
...and I was letting him...
"When we meet again..."
Then, the wind suddenly blew harder than I could have ever possibly imagined. Shouting with the childish voice I had, I said, "I can't hear you because the wind's so loud!!!"
The sakura blossoms rose of their own accord and a stream of them enveloped the contours of our bodies. Thrashing through pretty petals, I lifted up my sleeve to block them from hitting my face.
These petals are soft...but deadly with the wind...
"I can't hear you!" I shouted as I rose abruptly from my bed.
Looking down into my lap and at my hands, tears emerged and flowed down to my pajamas.
These hands that were cursed because of that boy.
But wasn't it a dream? Wasn't it just a dream??
And yet it was so real...as if I was forced to forget...
but the truth is here.
Right in front of me.
No matter how many times I try to remember this incident, my mind forgets all by itself.
Time will eventually seep in and I will not know of this anymore...
Stop.
Block.
I cannot remember anything beyond that. Though it has hurt me, though it has been constantly reminded me, though at times it has caused me to go mad inside myself, I cannot remember anything.
And yet the memory persists deep inside of me.
Getting up from bed, I walk down the hall to the bathroom and look at the mirror. "Smile. That's all you can do."
Everyday...everyday I am burdened with the fact that my life has been threatened since I was little...
But that didn't depress me anymore. As my twin sister said to me, "Why are you sad, Subaru? You shouldn't cry. You should smile."
"But...but..." I couldn't tell her about my hands at that moment because I didn't understand it myself as my grandmother's horrific face gave no word about something that I couldn't understand just yet.
Hokuto-chan took my face into her hands and smiled at me. "No matter what, I hate it when Subaru-kun is sad. So always smile."
Nodding my head and washing my face with a smile, I tried as much as possible to keep my innocence...
...but because of that disturbing dream, I knew it would eventually fall apart.
And I knew at that moment...
...that boy with no name had everything to do with it...
--
Author's note: Subaru is my favorite character of all time and so I wanted to make him more analytical than he is represented.
This is my interpretation of him...
Random Thoughts
by Yui Miyamoto
Years ago, a memory had faded in the seams...
...and then it haunted me until it became so real I bled from my hands...
...and from my heart.
Chapter 1 - The boy, Nanashi
As I looked around confused, I found a boy looking at me with a peculiar smile that I couldn't understand why he had looked like that. This smile was so inviting, and yet it made me so fearful. It was as if he were going to kill me with that strange grin that looked so surreal: both sincere and not so.
"Do you like sakura?" he had asked me.
"Hai!" I answered excitedly as I nodded my head in confirmation.
It was my favorite. I had such a fascination with this particular tree that we the Japanese had regarded in such high esteem, yet its beauty seemed so dreamlike that it was deadly if it caught you off-guard.
"Cherry blossoms are always as white as snow. Even whiter. But do you know why they are pink?"
Innocently, I shook my head at him.
My heart was beating very fast as if it knew at that moment what he would say...
"It's because of the blood of the dead corpses buried under the sakura." He clenched his fist as if he had blood running through his fingers and seeping to the ground itself.
Filled with sadness, I couldn't hold my feelings inside. It overflowed until I found myself crying for these people.
Blinking with tears in my eyes, I asked, "But aren't they sad?"
Then, that face that was so sure and calm suddenly became surprised as he looked at me.
Why? Why are you looking at me like that? Why must you be surprised at this comment?
Don't...
Don't you feel anything for these dead people?
Nothing at all...?
He then knelt so that we could look at each other on eye-level. "I'll make a bet with you."
My lips were closed in fright and shock. I didn't know what overcame me, but there was this incredible fear and yet inviting seductiveness that drew me even closer to him.
Was it his aura, his look, or he himself? I do not know. All I knew was that he was sucking the life out of me...
...and I was letting him...
"When we meet again..."
Then, the wind suddenly blew harder than I could have ever possibly imagined. Shouting with the childish voice I had, I said, "I can't hear you because the wind's so loud!!!"
The sakura blossoms rose of their own accord and a stream of them enveloped the contours of our bodies. Thrashing through pretty petals, I lifted up my sleeve to block them from hitting my face.
These petals are soft...but deadly with the wind...
"I can't hear you!" I shouted as I rose abruptly from my bed.
Looking down into my lap and at my hands, tears emerged and flowed down to my pajamas.
These hands that were cursed because of that boy.
But wasn't it a dream? Wasn't it just a dream??
And yet it was so real...as if I was forced to forget...
but the truth is here.
Right in front of me.
No matter how many times I try to remember this incident, my mind forgets all by itself.
Time will eventually seep in and I will not know of this anymore...
Stop.
Block.
I cannot remember anything beyond that. Though it has hurt me, though it has been constantly reminded me, though at times it has caused me to go mad inside myself, I cannot remember anything.
And yet the memory persists deep inside of me.
Getting up from bed, I walk down the hall to the bathroom and look at the mirror. "Smile. That's all you can do."
Everyday...everyday I am burdened with the fact that my life has been threatened since I was little...
But that didn't depress me anymore. As my twin sister said to me, "Why are you sad, Subaru? You shouldn't cry. You should smile."
"But...but..." I couldn't tell her about my hands at that moment because I didn't understand it myself as my grandmother's horrific face gave no word about something that I couldn't understand just yet.
Hokuto-chan took my face into her hands and smiled at me. "No matter what, I hate it when Subaru-kun is sad. So always smile."
Nodding my head and washing my face with a smile, I tried as much as possible to keep my innocence...
...but because of that disturbing dream, I knew it would eventually fall apart.
And I knew at that moment...
...that boy with no name had everything to do with it...
--
Author's note: Subaru is my favorite character of all time and so I wanted to make him more analytical than he is represented.
This is my interpretation of him...