Final Sendoff
He looked down at his wife. He had known this wonderful creature for 18 years. They got married, something he had never thought he would do, 16 years ago. And for 14 years they had lived in bliss. They had a child. Henry had been thrilled when little Lilly was born. They had made a beautiful life, he and his Swan.
He looked down at his Emma lying in the hospital bed. Her hair, which had once been bright, golden and thick, was now dull and thin. Her face was shrunken in from the massive amount of weight she had lost. Her eyes, which had once been filled with light, sat droopy and sad. And somehow she was still the most beautiful woman in his world.
It wasn't fair. When she had gotten sick it had seemed like nothing to be concerned with. Then when her condition rapidly worsened they had done everything in their power to get her healthy again. But it was all for nothing in the end. Magic couldn't heal all the illnesses from this world. And science and medicine had failed them as well.
Killian wished she would hold on to life. Beat this for him, or at least keep going until she absolutely could not go on. All Killian wanted was to force her to stay but he couldn't be selfish. Emma had been in pain for too long. Plus she had made up her mind. And when his Swan made up her mind, she did what she wanted.
"Emma, Emma, love, you need to wake up." Killian slightly shook her arm. Her left hand was still fastened around his hook.
"Killian?" Emma said groggily. He felt a familiar pang in his chest when she spoke his name. It seemed the sound of his name on her lips still, after all these years, managed to make his heart flutter. "Did I fall asleep?"
"Yes love. Only for a little while" Killian said softly bending down to kiss her forehead.
"Where is Lilly? And Henry? Are they coming?" Emma asked. Today was the day. Everyone should be here.
"Of course. That's why I woke you up. I just got off the phone with Red. Your mum and dad are bringing Lilly. Henry and Grace are on their way too... I think they are bringing Mary with them. The seven of them should be here shortly. Regina called and wanted you to know she is thinking of you. She is a little miffed that I wouldn't let her come. But I thought we should keep it small. The entire town would come if I let them. But you need your rest, love." Killian said struggling to sound positive.
"Oh, my silly pirate." Emma said with an affectionate smirk. She reached up and stroked Killian's face tenderly. She spoke softly, "We both know rest won't help. There is nothing on this earth or any other we have tried that is going to change this. But you're right we should keep it small. I don't need a full blown party right now. Not sure I am up to it. I just want the ones I love most here to say goodbye."
"Emma, please-" Killian started before Emma moved her hand over his lips.
"Honey, please. Let's not pretend. Let's just have this last night together. I need you to be strong today. I always need you."
"Oh Emma," Killian said quietly, tears freely flowing now, "I need you too. Don't you see? If you are gone tomorrow what will I have? I will be left without a heart."
"I will tell you what you will have. You will have Henry and our daughter. You will have Snow and Charming. You will have our people. Killian you will never be alone. And I- I won't be here physically but I will be with you. You won't be without a heart because I will leave you mine." Emma's weak arms pulled Killian's face closer to her own and gently kissed the tears away from his cheeks.
Soft knocking made Killian pull away from Emma. He wiped the remaining tears from his face.
"Who is it?" he asked, pushing him up from the bed and standing next to it.
"Em, Killian it's me, Victor, may I come in?" The doctor asked from behind the door.
"Yes of course Victor, come in." Emma said.
Victor opened the door and walked in wearing a sad smile.
"How are you feeling Emma? Is the pain medicine helping?" he asked as he walked over to check the machines that where hooked up to Emma.
"Yes Vic. It is fine, I am fine." Emma smiled fondly at the doctor. It still amazed her, that her child's godparents were Victor Frankenstein and Red Riding Hood...
"Actually before she fell asleep she was complaining that the pain in her back had gotten worse." Killian said quickly, earning him a dark look from Emma. "Do you think you could give her a bit more of your medicine, Victor?"
"Of course," Victor said quickly. He motioned for Emma to sit. And with Killian's assistance she successfully managed to pull herself up and lean against the head board on her bed. Victor pulled out a syringe from his pocket and injected it into Emma's IV, never taking his eyes off of her.
"What is it Vic?" Emma asked. She gave him the classic, 'I know you have something to say so just spit it out already,' Swan look.
"Emma... Are you sure about this... I know my treatment didn't work but, Magic-" Victor started.
"Victor we talked about that. People die. There is no spell to cure bone cancer. I'm ok. I know what I am doing. Please respect that." Emma said. Killian's hand tightened around her own.
"Alright…" Victor said quietly. "I had to try. Well, then: your family is here and they want to see you. When they leave... When they leave I will come in and take you off the machines. We will give you some medicine to help you fall asleep and..." his voice trailed off. Unable to say what he knew was going to happen after he took her off the machines.
"Thank you." Emma said softly. She gave Victor a small smile. "Now send in my family. I want to say goodbye."
...
The sendoff took hours.
Killian felt like the world was spinning too fast.
He watched as Grace and Henry let Emma hold little Mary for the last time. Emma bidding the only grandchild she would ever know farewell. He watched Snow as she sat by Emma holding her hand the entire night quietly talking of how much Emma had changed Snow's life. He watched as David, who had always been the rock of the family, end up breaking down and having to leave the room. He held the man as he made peace with the fact he would outlive his only child. He listened as Red told Emma the story of Wolf's Passageway. A legend that said all good warriors of light were put before the King Wolf and he would escort them to paradise through the Moon.
Lilly and Henry were the last to leave Emma's room. Lilly looked so much like her mother had looked before she got sick, with her sharp face and beautiful eyes. At fifteen she was an amazing fighter and as smart and talented as a sorceress. And then there was Henry, who had turned into quite the prince (despite Killian's best effort to sway his stepson toward piracy). Henry was always fair and kind and he made Killian and Emma so proud... Both of his children were extraordinary people. Their goodbyes nearly made Killian loose it, but he had to be strong for Emma.
First they cried with their mother. Lilly said it wasn't fair. Henry said claimed there had to be another way. Then they laughed with Emma, talking about how much fun they had shared with one another. Right before they left, Emma told them to be good. It reminded him so much of how she used to send them both of to school. They promised they would make her proud, live good lives and try and do what was right. Finally she held them and told them they didn't have to try, she was already proud and she would always be a part of their lives. As they prepared to leave and with tears in their eyes, they each gave their mother a kiss goodbye.
Killian could barely stop himself from crying as his daughter left the room and threw herself into Snow's arms.
"Dad, we will all be at your house... Come home when... When she… she's gone. We will start making arrangements. My mom and dad are going to be there and they made dinner. Neal wants you to know how sorry he is for you. And Regina well, you know my mom. But Dad, are you going to be alright?" Henry said as he was hugging Killian goodbye in the hospital's lobby.
"I will be, son. Thank Regina and Neal for me. I'm just going to sit with your mum a bit longer. Make sure your sister is ok until I get home. It shouldn't be long. I love you."
"Of course dad," Henry said quietly. Henry grabbed Killian's arms and looked at him, tears swelling in the younger man's eyes. "Dad, I am so glad you came to Storybrooke. I am so glad you came into our lives. I am so glad you chose my mom. You made her so happy. And you make me so happy. I love you."
Killian choked back a sob as he pulled Henry into another hug. His son. They knew this kind of loss would be hard, but they had each other to pull through it. Killian let Henry cry in his arms until he pulled away and Killian started walking back to Emma's room.
...
"Killian…" Emma said quietly. She had been off the machines for almost half an hour now. They both knew they didn't have much longer.
Killian and Emma had just been lying together. Talking about their adventures, remembering how tough they had both been when they had first met. They lay there laughing at how long it took either one of them to admit they loved each other. Then when they couldn't say anything else they just laid there enjoying this last night together. When Emma broke the silence, Killian knew this must be their goodbye.
"Yes my love?" Killian asked softly as he absent mindedly ran his hook up and down her arm.
"We have a very attractive family." Emma said. "You are going to have to beat the boys away from Lilly with a stick! And my granddaughter will be no different! Henry and Grace made a beautiful baby girl! It makes me wonder what Lilly's babies will look like. You will have to make a record so when we see each other again you can tell me. Promise me you will look out for them and promise me you will tell me all about them. I am so sorry I won't get to know them. I am so sorry I have to go." Emma's voice had turned from light to frantic. Tears streamed down her face.
"Shhh, shhh, now darling," Killian whispered into her ear. "You have nothing to be sorry for. You are my savior Emma. And we will never ever forget you. You may not know your grandchildren but they will know you. I will tell the stories of Emma the Chosen One. The girl who learned to believe. Who fought witches and warlocks and handsome pirates" Emma laughed a bit at that—"and won. The woman who helped protect a town from darkness. And most of all, I will tell stories of how much she loved her family and how much she hated having to leave them. They will know you Emma. And of course I will protect them. I always protect what is mine." Killian said. Then he added sadly, "At least when it's within my power."
Emma turned her head to look at Killian. The man who had broken down all her walls; the man who never left her. The same man that she had given her heart to fully and completely. She stared at the man she loved and finally admitted to something she had denied even to herself.
"I'm scared." She whispered.
"I know love, I know." Killian said. "I am too."
"Will you sing to me one last time?" Emma asked quietly.
"As you wish my love." Killian said softly and began to sing a song he had learned long ago at sea. It was a song about love, hope, and saying goodbye. And when he finished he looked down at Emma and she smiled up at him with her eyes half closed...
"I love you, Killian" she said as she snuggled in closer to him. "I am so glad you chose me and convinced me to pick you. You are the only one who could have stolen my heart. I guess I should have known you are a pirate after all and..." Her words became softer and softer and finally they trailed off. Killian could hear her slow breathing.
"I love you too Emma..." He said tightening his arms around her. He stayed there, perfectly still, holding her. He was listening to each breath, then the moment he knew was coming arrived and he heard nothing.
"Victor," Killian called as he got up from the bed. He pulled the covers over Emma's shoulders and pushed a few stay hairs away from her face. He gave her one last kiss and whispered a proposition into her ear.
Victor came and checked Emma's pulse. He called time of death and pulled the cover up over her face. He shook his head as he walked over to his friend.
"Killian" Victor whispered quietly. Killian moved away from the bed and stood in front of Victor.
"She is gone, Vic" Killian said with one tear streaming down his cheek, his eyes staring out into nothingness. "She is really gone"
"I know" Victor said quietly, putting his hands on his friend's shoulders and pulling him into an embrace. Killian began to sob. The two men sank to their knees as he wept.
...
That was the second time a woman Killian loved died in his arms.
After his Milah died, so in a way had Killian. He had become Captain Hook and become crazed with the idea of vengeance. It wasn't until he had met Emma that he had slowly become Killian Jones again. He would not dishonor her memory by letting Killian go again. This time he would live.
Now he had a family. He and Emma had a family. And he would take care of it. And he would keep his promise. And he would hope she had taken him up on his proposition.
Killian's job now was to help people remember her. To turn Emma Swan's name into a fairytale and a symbol of hope to everyone he met. Every time the grandchildren stayed with him he told her story. Every Christmas the family was together he told the story of Emma, The Savior of Storybrooke. At Lilly's wedding he told the story of how they met and how quickly she had bested him. Every time he had dinner with Henry's family he told the story of how he and Henry had worked together to get Emma to recognize her feelings for him. It got to the point where everyone knew the stories by heart and yet he kept telling them anyway. Snow and Charming always told stories of their only child too. The three of them would sit for hours talking about her. Everyone who knew her told the stories, Regina, Neal, Red; even Rumpelstiltskin would praise the girl from time to time.
For the next 30 years Killian told the stories of his Emma and no one ever complained. How could you not enjoy hearing someone brag about their true love's accomplishments?
During those 30 years, Killian didn't just tell stories. He watched new ones grow. He made sure to remember every important thing, down to the smallest detail of what happened to his children, his grandchildren, his in-laws, his friends; because he had made a promise.
And he hoped she had heard his last request. He hoped she heard him when she was slipping away and that she had listened. What he had proposed was quite simple.
"Wait for me my love, wait and I will tell you everything…"
He just hoped he hadn't asked too late.
After all that time his final day came. And when he drifted off, he found out she had heard him. Emma had waited for him for 30 years. They were finally together again, and they were young and healthy.
"You waited" Killian said as he embraced Emma after so long. He ran his hands through her hair and took all of her in. A smile spread across Emma's face. And happy tears rand down her rosy cheeks.
"Oh-, my silly pirate. Of course I did."
Then Killian and Emma went on their last adventure. A wolf appeared and they followed it. As they went through to whatever lied beyond, Killian began telling Emma about her family.
And wherever they went, whatever they found in the beyond... What is important is they found it together.