Omelets lead to purple wormholes

Disclamer: sadly we do not own Stargate SG-1 or Stargate Atlantis, if we did there would have been more season and alot more strange occurances to drive the characters batty. also this story would have been part of the show... which its not.

By: Radmoxe

Prologue: Purple Wormhole

"In your face!" Amelia said to Chuck when she entered the room.

Chuck looked up from his conversation with Radek Zelenka. "What's in my face?"

"I made an omelet. And I made it right this time."

Sheppard walked into the room just as she said that. "What do you mean you made it right this time? What happened the first time? Or times?"

Chuck looked over at him. "The first time she tried to make an omelet, in seventh grade, we had to buy a new dishwasher."

"A dishwasher? What does a dishwasher have to do with omelets?"

"I don't know, but she managed to blow it up."

"By accident," Amelia added.

"What were you doing with the dishwasher? Cooking your omelet with the heated water in it?" Sheppard asked.

"No, of course not. I lit the stove on fire—"

"And your glove," Chuck interrupted.

"Yes, and my glove, which I failed to notice in time, and I ran over to the dishwasher and grabbed a cup that was full of water and threw it onto the fire. I dropped the glove into the dishwasher and it blew up a few seconds later when I ran down to get Dad."

"How did it blow up?" Sheppard asked with a bemused look on his face.

"I don't know. The maintenance guy said he didn't know either."

Sheppard just stared at Amelia with utter confusion on his face.

They failed to notice Woolsey enter the room. He looked at Sheppard's confused face, Amelia's calm face, Zelenka's curious face, and Chuck's distant face, as though he were remembering something.

"What did I miss?" Woolsey asked them.

They all jumped a bit at his voice. Amelia stated, "Woolsey, sir, you just missed a tragic memory."

"About what, if you don't mind sharing?"

Sheppard snapped out of it. "She blew up her dishwasher! Cooking an omelet!"

"How the hell did you do that?" Woolsey asked.

"I don't know! Nobody knows!" Amelia practically shouted.

Suddenly, the gate swirled open into a purple swirling vortex of doom.

Everyone walked over to the banister and looked in astonishment at the purple wormhole.

"Incoming wormhole, sir," Chuck said, dazed by the purple.

"I can see that, Chet," Woolsey said.

Chuck fought back the urge to punch Woolsey in the face.

"Chet, raise the shield," Woolsey said.

Chuck took a deep breath, his hands balled into fists, and walked over to the control panel. He pushed one of the buttons there, but nothing happened. He kept pushing it but still, nothing would happen.

"Chet, where is that shield?" Woolsey asked, shouting at him.

Chuck continued to push the button. "I don't know! I'm pushing the button but nothing's happening."

"Chet, we need that shield! Who knows who could come through the gate? Now find a way to give me a shield, Chet!"

That was the last straw. Chuck got up, whirled around and grabbed Woolsey by the collar and lifted him two inches or so off the ground.

"Whoa, he's strong," Sheppard whispered to Amelia.

"Yeah, he is, and he's also scaring me," she replied.

Chuck shook Woolsey while saying, "MY NAME IS CHUCK! THERE IS NO CHET! GET THE PICTURE! CHUCK, NOT CHET!"

Woolsey nodded, scared to death, and Chuck let him down.

Chuck took a deep breath and silently said, "That felt good."

As if on cue, as soon as Chuck was finished talking, a figure came flying through the gate. It landed in a curled position on the ground and as soon as it was through, the gate shut down. Woolsey and Sheppard ran down to see what it was.

When Sheppard realized that it was a girl, he called to Chuck, "Get a medical team down here, stat!"

Chuck nodded and contacted a medical team.

Sheppard turned the girl and rolled her over onto her back. He gasped and stood up, knocking into Woolsey.

"What happened? Did she do something to you?" Woolsey asked him.

"No, it's just that something about her seems familiar. I just can't put my finger on it," Sheppard replied.

The medical team arrived then and took her to the infirmary.