He loved his brother.
Once.
He couldn't remember how long ago that had been. Timeline jumping really messed with one's perception of time.
Physically, he was pretty unchanged from the first time he stepped into that monster made portal. A new scar here and missing chip of bone there, maybe, but no signs of aging.
Alphys had warned him that doing this may cause him to age rapidly or very slowly. He guessed that he had been cursed with the second choice. He wondered how she was doing. All alone like that. In the secret part of his heart, where he kept the dying embers of memories he once cared about, he hoped she had found someone else to love.
An outsider would argue that he could … you know … just stop and settle down in a peaceful timeline, somewhere. And, he had tried that, once, maybe twice. He wasn't sure.
It never lasted. He couldn't stay. He had to keep going. He had come too far and been at it too long for him to stop. It would just be so …
Disrespectful.
He owed it to them to see this through.
He patted the bag on his right hip. Alphys had told him it would that the container would signal him once it was ready, but that Alphys was long gone and maybe the machine was broken. It … didn't look broken … but then again, he wasn't a science guy. He was just doing his duty as a royal guard..
And also, he was doing it for Sans.
Yes. He was.
This was important.
He stepped out of his portal, closed it and put away the tiny gun looking machine back in it's bag on his left hip with practiced ease. This area in Waterfall was often empty, so he frequented it as an entry point, instead of Snowdin. It gave him some time to think and prepare.
This time, however, someone had been there, sitting in the lone bench that seemed to be a constant among all the timelines. Their head was tilted back and their body shifted slightly to the right. They were asleep.
Sans.
His brother. No!. Why was it so hard to get that through his head?. That wasn't his brother. It was another Papyrus' brother.
His own brother was dead.
It didn't help the vague aching in his heart that this one looked so much like his brother. Sometimes there had been enough of a difference in appearance, where he could just forget that his target was just a variation of his brother. Those had been easy.
He walked over to this Sans quietly, making a beeline for the back of the bench. He pulled his hood forward and pulled his scarf up so it hid his face. If he was careful enough, he could get his mission here done without a fight. That would be a nice change of pace..
He reached for his third bag hanging from the back of his hips. He kept this bag the furthest away from his reach. Hoping for that time he would never have to open it again.
He took out a black glove with all sorts of strange filaments attached to it. He slipped it on his right hand without even looking at it.
He put his left hand on the top of the bench to steady himself. He was shaking slightly but it was getting better with each time. He hated that he noticed that. He never wanted to be all better.
All he had to do, was to activate the glove. It would be over in less than a second.
"Easy and painless" Alphys had said with that smile of hers. That lying smile.
But his right hand felt heavy. Unresponsive to his will and his duty. He closed his eyes and he gritted his teeth and forced his hand up . Sans would never wake up. He wouldn't feel a thing.
Except that,
He was already awake and looking at him with a confused expression.
"papyrus?" he asked, rubbing his eyes and yawning. "when did you get here?"
Papyrus stumbled back surprised. Oh no … no, no, no.
Sans turned around on the bench so he was now sitting on his knees facing him. He squinted at him.
"what's with the getup?" Sans asked in an amused tone. "trying out new surface fashions?"
Surface? That must mean that this was a good timeline. Those were very rare, as he soon had come to find in his travels.
"UH, yeah…" He pulled off his hoodie and lowered his scarf. He looked at the ground. Maybe … maybe this time he should just visit …
"who are you?"
Papyrus looked up and saw the blue glow on Sans left eye. He was still sitting on his knees and still had a relaxed appearance, but the amusement in his voice had been replaced by a tense, guarded, tone.
No, no, no.
Why did he have to look so much like him?
"what timeline are you from?" Sans asked straightening his back a little more, slowly. Carefully.
It had always amazed Papyrus how fast Sans gaze could go from vague to piercing. So this Sans knew about timelines as well. Well - all of them knew in some way or another - but this one had made the correct assumption immediately - and, he knew to be on guard as well.
I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
"A BAD ONE" Papyrus said. There was no point in explaining the details. He wouldn't remember anyway.
"huh, sorry to hear that" commented Sans and he turned around so he was sitting the right way on the bench. He motioned to the empty space besides him. "why don't you take a seat?"
Papyrus blinked in confusion. He suddenly trusted him?. He put his right hand in his coat's pocket and walked around the bench to sit on the other end. No, his eye was still glowing blue.
As soon as he settled down, Sans regarded him for awhile, obviously still making his mind up about the whole scenario.
"you're taller" Said Sans and he smiled. However, his smile didn't reach his eyes and Papyrus was aware of it. "what brings you here?"
"I'M … I'M JUST VISITING" he said trying to sound as relaxed as he could, which was not very much.
"visiting" repeated Sans. He moved his eyes looking around at their pretty lonely location. "kind of a weird place to visit considering nobody comes here. except me … and you"
"YEAH … NOT ALL TIMELINES ARE FRIENDLY. SO I RATHER JUMP TO AN AREA THAT ITS MOST LIKELY TO BE EMPTY"
"ah"
They sat in silence for a bit. "Easy and painless" Alphys words floated around Papyrus' head. He cleared his throat.
"I…"
"where's your sans?" interrupted Sans.
"OH … UH …" Papyrus first instinct was to lie, but he just couldn't. "HE DIED" he answered not looking at Sans at all. "HE … WAS SICK"
"oh…" and for the first time, Sans voice truly softened. "sorry to hear. its just that usually when we get a timeline traveler, its a sans. it's …kinda of .. our thing, you know?"
"YEAH. I KNOW. ALPHYS … MY ALPHYS … CREATED THE DEVICE THAT LETS ME VISIT TIMELINES BASED ON HIS …RESEARCH"
"heh, wow, so your sans was a bonefied scientist" said Sans wistfully. "what did he di…. you know what? you don't have to tell me. let's not tempt fate. so, you are just visiting?"
"YEAH"
Sans snorted a little bit.
"um … sorry, but why?"
Papyrus had been asked this many times. Not only by each Sans he encountered, but also by every other version of himself and his friends. He didn't have a good answer. How could they possibly understand? How could they understand that he was here to collect a soul, because of what his brother did?
They never understood and he had given up on explaining.
So he lied.
And every time he felt like he was betraying everyone. All over again.
This time, however, this Sans wasn't asking why he was doing such a horrible thing. He was just asking why he was "visiting". He didn't have to lie. Not quite, anyway.
"I JUST LIKE VISITING OTHER TIMELINES" he said.
This wasn't a lie. He liked visiting other timelines.
"I TRY NOT TO STAY TOO LONG, THOUGH…" he continued not lying.
"AND I HARDLY EVER TALK TO ANYBODY…" About one third lie.
"ITS NICE TO SEE MY BROTHER AGAIN, EVEN IF … YOU KNOW … IT ISN'T MY BROTHER"
Outright lie.
"really? …" It came out as a question but it was really more of statement. A challenge.
"OF COURSE! WHY WOULDN'T I LIKE SEEING MY BROTHER?"
Sans kept his eyes on him but his gaze was far away. "i guess. after a while it becomes really painful though. i don't know why you would seek that pain."
"AH … YEAH …"
"welp. its not up to me to judge" Sans shrugged and hopped off the bench. "not anymore, at least" He winked.
Papyrus didn't smile.
Sans sighed.
"you know … you always been a bad liar. no matter the timeline"
"I KNOW AND … I'M SORRY"
"like i said, i'm not here to judge. but, i recognize that look. i saw it countless of times on the human. so, what are you really here for?" Sans' eye was still blue and he was putting some distance in between them.
No, no, no … maybe … he would understand. Papyrus got up and took his right hand out of his coat's pocket.
"I'M HERE … TO CORRECT A PROBLEM MY BROTHER CREATED" he said walking over to Sans. The smaller skeleton didn't move away but Papyrus could see his hands twitching inside his hoodie pockets.
"a problem?"
"YES. UNFORTUNATELY, THIS PROBLEM IS NOT RESTRICTED TO MY TIMELINE. ITS SLOWLY BUT SURELY SPREADING TO OTHERS. ALPHYS - MY ALPHYS - SAID THAT IT WAS LIKE A VIRUS"
"huh"
Papyrus stopped a little over an arm's length away from Sans. He didn't want him to run away. He hated that. It only made it more difficult for the both of them.
"I'M COLLECTING THE "DATA" I NEED TO COMBAT THIS VIRUS" he spread his arm in front of him, palm up, revealing a powering up glowing blue circle taking up most of the width of his hand.
"what kind of data?" asked Sans eyeing the gloved hand warily. He unconsciously put a couple of more steps distance in between them.
"YOURS" said Papyrus sadly.
The device activated fully and a beam of light escaped from it. At first glance, it looked like it was made out of zeroes and ones, then you would realize that the digits were inside the beam itself, not part of it. Sans couldn't help but be curious about it.
Papyrus closed his eyes.
"what is …" Sans began but was interrupted by two unfathomably fast beams of light sprouting from the main one and piercing his chest seeking his soul. They trapped it and absorb it. Sans barely had a chance to look up at Papyrus, before his whole body disintegrated.
Papyrus opened his eyes again and looked at the beam of light. The silhouette of a monster soul was now inside of it. It was slowly disintegrating into zeroes and ones.
"I'M SORRY. I TRULY AM." He opened his right hip bag and took out the soul container in there. He put his gloved hand against it and all the data it had collected was transferred. He held his breath as he looked at the lights near the bottom of the container. If the right one turned green. His mission was over.
It remained a steady red.
Sudden emotion overtook him and he felt the urge to smash the container against the ground. To turn his gloved hand against himself even though he knew that it was calibrated exclusively for Sans' data signature.
He wanted to stop.
He fell to his knees and held the container against his forehead. Tears staining the smooth metal surface.
It was never easy.
It was never painless.