The Perfect Announcement
How does one tell her husband that in less than seven months he will be a father?
Even in the most healthy and loving marriages this kind of information could be quite a shock. And let's face it, while her and Lex's marriage was far from the turmoil of his previous marriages, neither of their pasts made the news of impending parenthood something to be taken with aspect of flowers and kittens. Sure all parents are scared the first time around, but Chloe knew their shared worries would make the record books.
She wanted to make sure she got this right the first time around. Just in case there wouldn't be a chance for a second child.
She could choose the normal "Dear, sweetie, honey, baby, I need to talk to you." But that certainly wasn't their style.
Or she could write an article in the Daily Planet announcing the pregnancy thus ensuring that Lex would discover it while drinking his morning coffee. She wasn't being conceited knowing that it would make the front page. This was her life now and even if it was annoying, such was the cost for the benefits. However, that wouldn't be fair to him to discover with the rest of the population of Metropolis.
Maybe she could get inspiration from their history of danger in Smallville:
Dear Lex Luthor,
I am currently holding your wife's uterus hostage. I will return it in approximately seven months in exchange for food and shelter for the next eighteen years. Please be advised to be on your best behavior, or I will unleash unruly hormones thus ensuring you never have the chance to reproduce again.
Sincerely,
Baby Luthor
Cute and unique, but would it be worth the heart attack she'd give him before his brain had a chance to kick in and realize what the letter meant? She'd put the idea in the 'maybe' pile in case she couldn't think of anything better.
She could hide clues or leave a treasure map that would lead to the pregnancy test. However, knowing Lex, he would probably think this was just a fun way to get sex. He'd give up half way through just to find her himself, and then they would be too busy to talk.
Another way would be in the form of an interview. Again, he would just assume it was another sex game, but he would indulge a few questions first. She would just have to start right out of the gate before he managed to get her mind off topic.
"Mr. Luthor, how do you feel about children?"
"Children are very nice when they are well behaved. My very intelligent and amazingly sexy wife and I participate in several LuthorCorp charities to help children in need. We want to make sure every child has wonderful memories to balance out the unfortunate troubles they may have to endure."
Again, she wasn't being conceded when she imagined Lex's answer. She just knew him well enough that he would throw in compliments if he thought it would get the interview over faster and get to the sex sooner.
"And how do you feel about becoming a father very soon?"
"Lex?"
"Lex, did you hear me?"
"Blink once if you're still alive."
What would it say if the first time he became speechless during their conversations was because she announced she was pregnant? The idea had its appeal if she really wanted to win one of their sessions, but she couldn't use it every time. Besides, she didn't really want the news to send him in a catatonic state.
Perhaps, she wasn't being fair to him. He might be able to take the news really well. They had discussed their desire for children before they got married. And they recognized their weaknesses but also knew that when the time came, they would rally and be capable. As long as only one of them broke down at a time, the other would be around to help and pull the other back together. But how one handled the imagined 'what if?' could not prepare them for the actual 'it's here.' Were they really ready to be parents?
Was she?
"Chloe?"
Only then did she realize Lex had entered the room. She took a calming breath determined not alert him to anything being wrong. "Hey, sorry I didn't hear you come in. I was busy thinking."
Lex nodded in understanding while he came around to face her. Gently cupping her face, he asked "Would this thinking have anything to do with you being pregnant?" Noting her surprise and anticipating the question, "I saw the pregnancy test in the trash can."
"Seems I've lost some of my sneaking skills. I'll have to work on that."
"After the baby comes. Not even you could manage to be inconspicuous while pregnant." He skillfully avoided her playful slap, leaned in and kissed her.
"Happy?" She asked trying her best to keep the worry out of her voice.
"Ecstatic."
Looking into his eyes, she could tell that he was. Whether or not they were ready was still in question, but she knew he was eager. And for that matter, so was she.
And if everything worked out well, then maybe in a few years she could use the ransom letter for the next time.