I, like a lot of people, was heart broken by the events of City of Lost Souls, containing a certain Shadowhunter and Warlock... (Why Magnus?) and now I must write my sorrows away like everyone else.

I don't know how Alec got away from Maureen, whether he just walked away, ran, fought, or talked his way out so I will skip right after that.

Disclaimer: The mortal instruments and it's characters belong to Cassandra Clare, and should be taken away for their safety and my sanity.

.

Pain

By

Meadow Frost

.

Pain.

Alec had thought he had known pain inside and out. He was a shadow hunter, he mutilated his skin on a daily bases, Demon poison from a greater demon had once seared through his body, he held his dead little brother. Alexander Lightwood had known pain.

This was something else, something deeper, deeper then his heart, it struck his soul. He didn't even notice the rain as it fell, running down his cheeks. He was suppose to get his stuff from Magnus's, he should go home and tell them about Maureen, he shouldn't keep wandering aimlessly through the city. But he wasn't, he wouldn't, and he couldn't.

The only thing he had wanted was to live with Magnus forever, to stay with him. That was never happening now. And it was all his fault, the thing he so desperately fought to keep away, Magnus leaving him, he had brought on himself. He had no one to blame but himself. There was Camille, but she was dead now.

All he wants now is Magnus back, to be able to kiss him one more time. To take back all the things he had done to hurt him.

But that was impossible.

Just as impossible as it was to move on. Magnus had become his life, and you can't turn your back on your life.

...

Isabelle wandered the institute, she had been contemplating over what Clary had said to her. She did like Simon—no, she loved him—She would do anything for him. And that was what bothered her so much. But she had come to a decision, she was going to invite Simon out, and tell him what she really felt about him.

She pulled her cell phone out and started dialing when the elevator came to a loud stop. She waited for someone to get out, but the gate didn't move. Through it, she could see a slumped over silhouette.

Curiosity and worry took over and she made her way closer. She pulled open the gate to see a slouched over Alec his face in his hands, his long legs stretched out. A pool of water formed underneath him. She dropped down in the puddle beside him, putting her hands on his shoulders.

"Alec? What's wrong?" There was no movement to respond from her brother so she shook him hard. "Alec, you're scaring me." He pounced on her crushing her in a hug. He smelled strongly of alcohol. Alec didn't drink. "What happened to you? You're soaking wet."

"Don't do it Iz." He mumbled against her neck. "Don't do it."

She took in a steady breath and asked, "Don't do what?"

"Fall in love." he whispered.

Oh. "What did Magnus do to you?" She rocked him back and forth as he shivered in her arms. From the cold or something else she didn't know.

"He broke up with me." He sounded detached, like it was something that had happened to someone else, not him.

Her eyebrows nit together. "Why? What happened? I thought you two were happy."

"No. mea culpa, mea maxima culpa."

"Why is it your fault?" He just shook his head trying to stand up, she realized this and helped him. He walked unsteadily out the elevator.

"Don't ever give your heart out Izzy," She fallowed him out and watched him walk down the hall, using the wall as a support. "unless you want it broken." He disappeared around the bend leaving her standing there alone. She looked down at her phone, Simon's number half dialed, and sighed, tucking it back in her pocket and going after her brother.

.

Short I know, but I just needed to vent.

Thank you for reading, I love it when people read my stuff. Though what would really put the icing on the cake and help me through these tough times is a review. Anyone?