*Author's Note: I got the idea for this fic from a line I included in Tooth & Claw: The In-Between Bits and had to get started on it immediately. It takes place right after The Satan Pit, which is such a pivotal episode for Ten and Rose in real cannon and in my headcannon. I'm not sure how many chapters this will be, so please leave your thoughts and suggestions in the reviews!*
Aside from the darkness in his eyes, the Doctor's face was inscrutable as he stood at the TARDIS console. He went about his usual routine, punching buttons and pulling levers, but Rose noticed a tension in his movements. She had a feeling she knew why.
They had just said goodbye to what was left of the crew representing the Torchwood Archive, having barely escaped from Krop Tor before it was sucked into a black hole. Rose had never been so happy to be reunited with her Doctor, as she thought she'd lost him to the beast in the pit. She hoped he'd felt the same way when he lifted her off the ground, swinging her slightly back and forth, crushing her to him in a powerful embrace.
He'd told her the beast was wrong, that she wouldn't die in battle. Rose cringed inwardly at the memory of those words. The lost girl, so far from home. The valiant child.
But now, just moments after comforting her, he had shut off. Rose could practically see the steel doors of his emotions inching downward, until they closed and locked with a clank. She wanted so badly to hug him again, to feel that he was really there, truly alright, but the thought of him not reciprocating the hug discouraged her. After all she'd been through over the past few days, that was truly something she wouldn't be able to take.
So she sat primly on the captain's chair, waiting for his steel doors to retract. After several minutes, which seemed like hours, she couldn't take the silence anymore.
"I didn't want to leave you!" she blurted, voice cracking a little toward the end.
The Doctor looked up, startled, dark eyes piercing hers, expression unchanged. "What?"
"When you were in the pit, they thought you were dead, but I knew you weren't," she fumbled on, grasping at all of the thoughts, the memories, flooding her mind. And even if he was, how could I leave him... all on his own, all the way down there? "But they over powered me, they sedated me, forced me onto the spaceship." She was softly crying now, the guilt that she had abandoned him overpowering.
His eyes softened as she let out a small sob and he crossed the room to stand in front of her. He cupped her face in his hands, thumbs brushing away her tears. She ventured a glance at him and was surprised to find no hint of betrayal in his eyes, but rather a soft sadness.
"I know," he said quietly. He pulled her into an embrace, holding her head to his chest, and Rose let out a sigh of relief at the contact, at his emotional doors pulling up. "I should never have left you up there, alone," he continued, voice thickening. "It was like the beast was beckoning me, pulling me down to him. But once we were down there, once we knew we were trapped... Before I descended all the way into the pit, I told Ida, if she made contact with the crew again, I told her to tell you," he pulled the reins on his fumbling words as this last bit came out. He remembered he hadn't told Ida to tell Rose anything. Oh, she knows.
"Tell me what?" Rose asked, lifting her head from his chest to look at him, arms still clutching his back, not ready to let go.
"It doesn't matter now," he said, steel doors clamping down again. He gently disentangled himself from her arms and stepped away, Rose feeling the loss of his body instantly. She never felt quite so at peace when his arms weren't around her. "Listen, Rose, there's somewhere I need to take you," he continued. "The TARDIS will take some time to recover after everything she's just been through, so I've put her into orbit around a nearby sun. We should be able to reach our destination in about 15 hours."
Rose's brain scrutinized his phrasing, that he needed to take her somewhere. She worried that he had felt betrayed after all, that his hug was merely a goodbye, and he was planning to take her back to Earth. "Won't you tell me where we're going," she asked.
"Oh, you'll know it when you see it," he said, expression blank once more. "You've had a long day, Rose. Why don't you go get some rest while I finish with the recalibrations."
"You sure you don't want some company?" She didn't want to leave him alone after the events that had transpired. She especially didn't want to leave him if this was their last few hours together.
"I'll be alright. Just need to run some final checks to make sure nothing was seriously damaged when the ship fell into the pit. Then I'll be getting some rest myself."
Rose forced a smile and folded her arms over her chest, still feeling his absence there, and turned to walk down the hallway to her bedroom.
Rose fought back tears as she brushed her hair, wishing the Doctor would be more open with her. Every time she thought they were making progress, he would shut her out again. Finishing with her hair, she walked to the bathroom to wash her face and decided that if he did bring her home tomorrow, she would simply refuse. She would make him talk to her, make him understand what she felt for him, that she wouldn't leave him, not ever.
After washing her face and brushing her teeth, Rose changed into a white t-shirt and pink cotton shorts, and climbed under the duvet. This room in the TARDIS now felt more hers than the bedroom in her mom's flat on the estate. Rose curled up in her large bed, facing the wall, steeling her resolve for what might come tomorrow, and drifted off into a light sleep.
She awoke not long after at the feeling of the mattress shifting behind her. Keeping her eyes closed, feigning sleep, she knew it was him. She could smell him, that musky scent of space and time and autumn leaves. It always reminded her of the scent wafting off someone who had just come inside the warm flat from the freezing cold - the weather was left on the other side of the door, but a part of it lingered on the person, not ready to let go yet.
Continuing to take deep breaths, like those of a person deep in sleep, she breathed him in, savoring him. She didn't want him to know she was awake, in case it would drive him away. Her mind floated back to a few mornings when she thought she could faintly smell him here, and wondered if this was not the first time he'd crawled into her bed. She hoped it wasn't.
Propped on his elbow, the Doctor regarded his sleeping girl. She always looked so peaceful like this, her hair brushed back from her face, arms clutched to her chest, as if cuddling an imaginary teddy bear. He deduced that she must have had one as a child and while her conscious self may have grown out of stuffed animals, her unconscious never did. His heart swelled at the thought, that despite Rose's courage and strength and fight, there was still such an innocence about her. The valiant child.
Something had changed for the Doctor when he was in the pit with the beast, when it tried to make him choose between killing it and saving Rose. He cursed himself for being so blind that an evil creature had recognized his feelings before he did. Fortunately, the beast had presumed his feelings were a weakness, not a strength. If I believe in one thing... just one thing... I believe in her.
Rose made a soft noise in her sleep, pulling the Doctor's thoughts back to the innocence of the girl below him, fortifying his decision in their next destination. At the start, countless adventures ago, he had taken her somewhere as a test and, in doing so, stripped some of that innocence away. He couldn't take it back, but he had to do it over, do it right. Everything that happened on the impossible planet told him it was what he must do.
Wrapping the duvet around him, the Doctor laid down on his side facing Rose, nose inches from the back of her head. A few other nights, usually after an adventure had resulted in great loss, the Doctor would sneak into her bed and lay like this for a couple hours, just needing to be close to someone, close to her. Tonight her nearness overwhelmed him and he broke his own rule, reaching an arm around her, cradling her to his chest.
Rose's breath hitched at the feeling, thoughts overwhelmed by the intimacy of it. A pain began burning in her chest as she realized he was saying goodbye to her. Well, she knew she wasn't going to let that happen. Her arm slid down over his before she realized she was doing it and she let out a shaky breath, having been holding it since the moment he touched her.
"Rose?" he whispered.
She slowly turned to him in response, feeling smooth silk covering his legs as she did so. As his chest came into view she saw a dark blue shirt of the same fabric and smiled - he was in his jimjams. She looked up into his face and stilled at the emotions emanating from his gaze. The warmth was back in his eyes.
"I'm not leavin' you," she breathed.
"I know," he said, echoing his words from earlier. He wrapped his arms around her back and she nuzzled her head under his chin. That was a good enough answer for now, and Rose wasn't going to say or do anything to disrupt this closeness between them, whatever the reason for it may be.
Curling her arms around his waist and lacing one of her legs through his, Rose fought to stay awake. What's the point in sleeping when your dreams are happening while you wake? But ultimately her exhaustion and the Doctor's hands rubbing soothing patters on her back overwhelmed her, and she fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.
The next morning Rose awoke alone, but the Time Lord's scent was still there. She allowed herself a few moments to remember last night, to ensure that it was real, to fortify the memory just in case it was the last time she'd ever touch him like that.
She stretched languorously and got out of bed, feeling so rested that she must have slept for hours and hours. Good, I'll need all the strength I can get for the day ahead, she thought, turning on the shower. Rose quickly washed and dressed before seeking out the Doctor, who was again in the console room.
"Ah, brilliant, you're up!" he said, familiar beaming smile back on his face, as if the satan pit - or last night - had never happened.
Rose's heart sank, but she decided it was best to play along. "So, you gonna tell me where we're off to then? I can't take the suspense."
"Well, you need wait no longer, because we're here!" he grinned, grabbing Rose's hand and leading her down the ramp to the TARDIS door. She readied herself for the flood of familiar sunlight from her home planet.
The room they stepped into, however, was in total darkness. Rose clutched the Doctor's hand as he lead her onward, apparently having no trouble seeing despite the lack of light. Slowly, her eyes adjusted, and Rose could make out a long metal hallway.
"Is- is this a space station," she asked, unable to hide her confusion.
"Yep!" he said, popping the P. "It was abandoned a few hundred years back, actually, but I had a look around while you were sleeping. Turned the oxygen tanks back on - they should work for a few days at least, not that we'll be that long - and the deflector shields are still operational. You humans build things to last!"
"Humans... humans build this?"
"They did indeed, or a version of them, you know," he replied. She did not know, but continued to walk beside him mutely, her brain still trying to wrap itself around this unexpected scenario.
"Ah-ha," he said finally, leading them through a door into a large room. In the darkness, Rose could make out several faded armchairs and sofas, a wood dining table with eight chairs, plates, glasses, and silverware all in the right spots, and a plush mattress against the back wall, sheets still folded tight around it. Rose thought it strange that the couches and armchairs were all facing the blank wall opposite the bed.
"Looks like they left in a hurry, right before dinner or somethin'" Rose mused, still unable to form an intelligent thought about where they were or why they were there.
When the Doctor didn't reply Rose's eyes sought him, and found his hands searching for something on the wall in the corner. Apparently having found it, he made a grunt of satisfaction, and stepped back. The sound of metal clanking suddenly filled the room and Rose noticed the blank wall in front of her had begun to retract into the ceiling.
The Doctor walked over to join Rose and took her hand, looking out at the view that was now revealed to them.
Rose gasped loudly when she finally realized exactly where they were. The Doctor had taken her back to Earth. Five billion years in the future.