"Holy shit," I said, walking into John's living room as the cool air flowed into the room. "Egbert, I know you're in your windsock blanket but god damn why the hell do you make it so cold?"
John frowned and pulled his hood over his own hair, "I'm not causing it, Dave." He pushed the door behind me, forced to use effort
I smirked, then rubbed the other's head "Or maybe it's because we're on your fucking planet. LOHAC is more my thing."
John looked up to me, only being shorter by an inch or two, and then pointed his face down. It was obvious he was caught deep in thought. After a few seconds, he finally took a deep sigh.
I lifted John's chin, "Speaking of which… Why isn't Karkat here? It's best bro night." But just as I finished that sentence, I regretted it, only keeping a neutral look. John gulped, the corner of his eyes glistening. Before I knew what I was doing, the hand holding John's chin was stroking his cheek. "Fuck," I said, my glasses alerting me that Karkat was trying to bother me, "Fuck fuck fuck." I pushed myself away from Egbert, running up the stairs to find the bathroom. John just called, "I'll set the movie then?"
As I made my escape to the bathroom and locked myself, I leaned my back to the sink, opening up Pesterchum. A new chat opened, showing gray letters.
- carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling turntechGodhead [TG] -
CG: DAVE.
CG: I HATE TO ASK YOU THIS, BUT I NEED YOUR HELP.
CG: I HAVE, WHAT YOU CALL, "BOYFRIEND PROBLEMS" WITH JOHN.
TG: dude wtf
TG: i mean i know we are bros but
TG: im not a marriage counselor
CG: STFU.
CG: ALL I KNOW IS THAT HE WON'T TALK TO ME.
TG: holy shit dude
TG: what the hell did you do
TG: he never does that
TG: hahaha you totally fucked up
CG: SHUT IT YOU SHITWAD.
TG: nah
CG: YOU WILL HELP ME THIS INSTANT.
TG: nah man
TG: afraid that we are having a best bros night
CG: ARE YOU FLIRTING WITH *MY* BOYFRIEND?
TG: karkat pls
TG: thats a low even for you
CG: WHATEVER.
CG: WHEN YOU'RE DONE THOUGH, YOU BETTER HELP ME.
TG: fine
TG: only because your problems are srsly melodramatic
CG: AND DON'T YOU FUCKING DO ANYTHING WITH JOHN.
TG: cant make any promises
CG: FUCK YOU.
- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG] -
I shoved a hand into my pocket, sighing. Out of all the times Karkat decided to bother me, it was the only time I actually got to spend with John. Shaking my head, I carefully unlocked the bathroom door and walked down the stairs to see Con Air paused. John was already settled on the couch, two bottles of apple juice set right in front of him. The couch itself was covered in a black blanket.
I picked up the pace when I spotted the yellow-orange bottles of juice, then sat on the couch next to John. He looked to me, his cheeks flushed a light pink and his goofy grin in place. John picked up his bottle of juice and said, "So? Who was it?"
I stared at the boy, my expression calm, "Oh, just Terezi. She needed something because she misplaced her red chalk or whatever."
"Oh," John took a sip from his apple juice, looking at the screen. "Well, I guess we should start watching…" He picked up the remote, and subtly pressed the play button.
I sighed, slowly twisting the cap of the bottle and sipped at the amber liquid. For the next hour and a half, I couldn't concentrate on the crappy movie. I still thought about what Karkat had said. I concluded that whatever he did, he got what he deserved.
As the last thirty minutes came around, John looked up to me, his hood pulled over his forehead, "Dave?"
"Sorry bro," I said, flicking around my now empty bottle around a finger, "Nic Cage absorbed me again. I think I found my true calling."
John chuckled, but continued, "I… I was thinking about what happened, with me and Karkat." He looked down again, his face hidden, "But, um, I think he's getting better at this relationship thing! He isn't as pissed as often…"
"Dude," I looked to John, and raised the empty container, "Aren't you and Kar in a fight or something?"
"I guess."
I slapped my palm against my face, "Whatever. Let's just finish the movie before this gets out of hand, okay?"
He nodded, and then rested his head on the armrest.
Once the movie was over, John said he wanted me to stay the night. Due to my incredible stupidity, I agreed, but I told him I would be talking to Terezi. He went to go make pasta while I stayed in the living room, staring at the ceiling until Karkat decided to bother me again five minutes later.
- carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling turntechGodhead [TG] -
CG: WELL?
TG: well what
CG: DID YOU GET HIM TO BREAK UP WITH ME OR WHAT?
TG: man u need to give me cred here
TG: its true
TG: i may have feelings for a certain blue windsock
TG: but i wouldnt abandon my best bro
CG: GOOD.
CG: NOW YOU HELP ME.
TG: mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
TG: mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
TG: mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
TG: ok
CG: GOOD YOU BRAINDEAD LUMPSQUIRT.
TG: pls if you want me to help w/ ur bf problems dont fucking call me lumpsquirt
CG: FUCK YOU.
CG: ANYWAY,
CG: DID HE SAY ANYTHING ABOUT ME?
TG: yea he said that youre less pissed rather than being a complete douche all the time
TG: and how hes glad that you are happy or whatever
CG: SHIT.
TG: i dont know about you
TG: but that sounds like he still swoons over you so
CG: NO.
CG: THANKS DAVE.
CG: BUT I HAVE TO GO NOW.
CG: BYE.
TG: what does a guy have to do around here to get attention
- carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling turntechGodhead [TG] -
I leaned back in the couch, pulling the soft, plush blanket over me. John emerged from the kitchen, showing he was carrying two plates of macaroni. He set the plates on the floor, and looked at me, "How is Terezi doing with her chalk?"
I sighed, motioning my head from his glare to a painting. I figured that he should know that I was talking with Karkat. "I'm not actually talking with Terezi."
"Then who?"
"Karkat."
John picked up the plates, placing one on my lap. He still stood with his own plate, "He's wondering about me."
"Possibly."
John sighed, and then sat next to me where the end of the blanket was covering the piece of furniture. The Heir picked up the fork which was placed neatly under the heap of pasta, "Please tell him to come here."
I tilted my head, then took a mouthful of macaroni, "He flipped his shit and went somewhere."
"I'll message him, then." And with that, he transformed to a breeze and flew into his room, leaving me with the couch.
John was gone for a while, prompting me to gobble down the macaroni. After I finished it, I threw the plate in the sink and decide to see if Terezi did want to talk.
- turntechGodhead [TG] started pestering gallowsCalibrator [GC] -
TG: hey terez
TG: john ditched me to go talk with karkat
TG: who could figure
TG: anyway im going to guess youre not here atm
GC: W41T D4V3
GC: 1M H3R3
GC: BUT 1 C4NT ST4Y FOR LONG
GC: JUST T3LL JOHN TH4T H3 1S 4 DOUCH3
GC: BYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY33333 ;]
- gallowsCalibrator [GC] ceased trolling turntechGodhead [TG] -
I leaned back on the cushions, "International Ditch Dave Day…"
John ran downstairs, "Sorry I kept you waiting, Dave!"
I swept a lock of blonde hair upon my iShades and crossed my arms, "It doesn't matter, everyone is doing it anyway."
John opened his mouth, "L-look, I'm sorry. But I was worried about Karkat, and I just needed to talk to him." He sat next to me, but kept the distance. He also started at me weirdly; as if afraid I would do something to him. But it wasn't a big deal to me, since he would always do that after talking with Karkat.
"It's fine, I don't really care." I got up from the blanket covered couch and stretched my arms and legs. I heard something pop, but didn't take note of it.
"Whatever then, "John moved up from the couch, walking in the direction to the TV, until a knock from the door echoed through the room. He shrugged and walked over, only to see a red blooded Kanaya standing with her chainsaw.