The thirty minute lunch period at Sburb High was always a peaceful time for Gamzee Makara. It was the only part of the day when he could hang out with more than two of his friends at once. They always sat along the brick wall outside the cafeteria, talking about this and that. For the sophomore, it was the best motherfucking miracle in the world.
He leaned forward to take a swig of his bottle of orange Faygo, being sure to not let any of it slip away and touch his white and grey face paint. It would also be a shame if any of it dripped onto his favorite black shirt, which he had designed himself. It had a clown smile on it, consisting of two large dots for eyes, a circle for the nose. And a simple curved smile, all in indigo. He also wore his dark grey pants that had big white spots all over them and matching shoes.
Just as he was setting the beverage down, a voice tore him from his daze. "Tell me I'm right, Gamzee." He turned to look at the source of the angry-sounding words. It was Karkat Vantas, his best bro. He was a brunette kid with brown eyes, and was currently wearing jeans and a black hoodie with a red crab on it.
"I'm so sorry, motherfucker, but what were you talking about?" Gamzee asked, scratching his head through the thick mess of his black hair.
"Augh!" Karkat grunted. "How the fuck can I expect you to back me up when your retarded brain is always somewhere else? I was telling this asshole with the lisp that guys like you and me don't need relationships to hold us down."
The asshole in question was Sollux Captor, the blonde kid sitting next to Gamzee. He was wearing a yellow shirt with a bee hive on it and the odd glasses that looked like what you would use for a 3D movie. According to him, his eyes were all out of wack and needed the red and blue lenses for him to be able to distinguish colors.
"That ith complete shit and you know it," he said pointedly. "You jutht can't get a girlfriend. I thee the way you look at TZ whenever she'th around, tho you can cut the bullshit."
Karkat's pale face turned red. "I…I have no idea what the fuck you're talking about."
"He's right, Crabsnack," said Feferi, a dark-haired girl in a floral print skirt and fuchsia shirt. "It's as obvious as the nose on your face!" She was always so energetic and excited.
"Feferi, how many times have I told you that I don't fucking like those stupid nicknames?" Karkat practically shouted, trying to divert attention to another subject. "I'm not Crabsnack, not Karcrab, and definitely not Mr. fucking Crabby. I get it, my favorite animal is a fucking crab. Get over it!"
"How about Karkles," a feminine voice asked from behind him.
He turned to see a girl with light brown hair and candy red glasses standing over him. She had teal jeands and a white shirt with a yellow stuffed animal called a Scalemate in the center. Her skin was a shade lighter than Karkat's. Her left hand supported a green lunch tray and the other held a walking cane.
"Hey Terezi," Gamzee said, waving to her. "How is my favorite motherfucking blind friend today?"
She tapped the space beside karkat to make sure nobody was sitting there and sat down. "Fine. I could hear Karkat yelling from inside before I came out. What's got him all cranky?"
"He'th trying to convinthe me that he'th too good for a relationship," Sollux stated before Karkat could stop him. Karkat's face turned bright red again.
"Hehehe, that's too bad. I thought what we had was special," Terezi said in mock disappointment. "Anyway, have any of you heard the most recent rumor that's been going around?"
"A motherfucking rumor?" Gamzee inquired, leaning forward to put an arm on his raised knee. "Can't say I have, motherfucker."
"Why the fuck would I care about a stupid damn rumor?" Karkat asked angrily.
Feferi shook her head.
Sollux seemed to be the only one who knew what Terezi was talking about. "You mean the one about tomorrow night?"
"Yeah," the blind girl replied. "They say that every Friday the thirteenth, a curse falls over the town of Sburb. Random kids from our school wake up that morning to find a ticket on their pillow and directions to a spot in Lowas forest. For that night only, there is a tent. And once you go in, you never come out."
Karkat burst out laughing. "What a bunch of bullshit! I can't believe people actually believe that kind of garbage!"
Sollux nodded. "For onthe, I agree with KK. There'th no way thomething that thtupid could be real."
"I didn't say I believed it," Terezi said defensively. "Just that I heard it and thought you guys would find it interesting."
"I don't motherfucking get why people have to all up and lie. Why not just talk about the miracles in the world?"
"Gamzee," Karkat began, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Every time you talk about miracles, I feel like you're trying to advertise how fucking high your asshole meds make you."
"Don't say that, Karcrab," Feferi interjected. "Gamzee is okay just the way he is."
"Oh, that motherfuckin reminds me. I got all get my move on over to Ms. Lalonde's room before lunch is over," Gamzee stated as he stood up and grabbed his backpack. "See ya later, motherfuckers."
As he walked, he took his purple iPod out of his pocket and put the earbuds in his ears. In no time, he was listening to "This is Halloween" by Marilyn Manson. None of his friends could understand how someone as perpetually happy as him could enjoy such dark songs. Somehow, they sent his already calm mind into a deeper meditative state and allowed him to set his body on a sort of auto-pilot. Not a single care in the world.
The song finished moments after he arrived at his destination. It was a cream-colored door with the word "Nurse" written across the top. It had a small square window, but it was blocked by a poster on the other side. On the inside, it smeeled like disinfectant and rubber gloves. There were two beds at the far end of the room, a desk near the door, and a counter lining the right wall. Over the counter was a row of cabinets.
There were two people already in the room. The first was a student slouching on one of the beds and drinking from a water bottle. He was muscular, with long black hair and a pair of cracked shades covering his eyes. His black and white gym clothes were drenched in sweat. Gamzee waved at him, and he nodded back as he fished another bottle out of his backpack. The other person was the nurse herself, Ms. Roxy Lalonde. She sat behind her desk, absentmindedly playing a game of solitaire on her desktop computer. She wore a long white dress with a pink scarf.
"Hey, Ms. Lalonde," Gamzee said with a grin. "How the motherfuck are you on this miraculous day?"
She looked up from her boring game at him. "Hello, Makara. I'm guessing you're here for your medication."
"Yeah."
He sat down on a stool as she stood up and walked over to the row of cabinets. He turned to the sweaty guy. "Hey, Equius. What's got you all up in this place today?"
"I got…dehydrated during gym class. Sometimes I wish I didn't perspire so much."
"I bet, motherfucker."
Ms. Lalonde came back to him with a plastic cup. It contained two pills filled with some bright green liquid. The medicine was called Sopor, but he liked to call it Sopor Slime. He took it three times per day and it was responsible for his calm and aloof mood. He used the last of his Faygo to mash the meds down. They would take about thirty minutes to take effect and supply him with about seven hours of tranquility. "That hit the motherfucking spot. Nothing like the wicked elixir to bring on the miracles."
The nurse chuckled. Sometimes the things that came out of that kid's mouth were just too strange to not laugh at. The bell rang, signifying the end of lunch. He threw the Faygo bottle in the recycling bin and grabbed his backpack again. His next class was science, and that was full of all kinds of miracles.
"See you tomorrow. Honk," he said before exiting.
Like always, the last three classes of the day passed in the blink of an eye. In Gamzee's biology class, they learned about genes. The teacher even called up him and Karkat to display how variations of a gene can give people different heights, with Gamzee being six feet tall and Karkat being 5'5. This got the shorter Karkat hot and bothered, proclaiming he could still kick the stoned fucker's ass. Later in math, Gamzee was busy staring out the window at the clouds while the rest of the class suffered through a lesson on triangles. He would just borrow someone's else's notes and copy off of them when he got home. Probably. The final period was culinary, where it was Pie Thursday again. He was always allowed to work on his own on that day of the week because he moved so fluidly through his own personal recipe that nobody could keep up. In no time, he had created two of his famous chocolate slime pies. He shared one with the class and set the other one aside to take home.
Now it was two o' clock, time to head home. He lived little more than two miles away, so he turned onto the sidewalk leading away from the school and started walking. He had put his earbuds in again and was strolling to the beat of "Welcome to the Show" by Britt Nicole, covered pie tin in hand.
If he hadn't been listening to his music, he would've heard the person sneaking up behind him. All he heard was "GAMZEE!" before he was tackled into the grass. He was careful to save the pie by keeping it face-up and away from his body, but that left him with nothing to stop his chest from thudding onto the ground.
He looking over his shoulder. Lying one top of him with her hands clutching his arms was a girl. She was around the same age as him, but was shorter by a good six inches. Her shoulder-length brown hair hung on either side of her cute face and her green eyes were full of glee. She was wearing a light green jacket with the hood up, which had cat ears, a triangular nose, and two X's where its eyes would've been. It was opened and revealed a darker green shirt with the Nyan cat on it. Her lower half was covered by jeans that seemed slightly too big for her and a pair of blue high-tops.
"Yo, Nepeta," Gamzee laughed, trying to turn over. "What's up, motherfucker?"
She hopped off of him and allowed him to stand up, still giggling and bouncing with energy. "I'm just so glad to see you, Gamzee! I haven't seen you since Gym class and that was furever ago!" In her excitement she jumped up and wrapped her arms around his neck in a hug.
"Woah, little kitty. You're gonna make me all up and drop my pie."
At the mention of the pastry, her eyes lit up even more and she let go. She inspected the pie tin in his hands with extreme interest. "Pie?" You mean chocolate slime pie?! Can I have some, purrlease?"
"No. This little miracle doesn't get to open until I'm home."
Her expression turned to one of determination. She started tugging his arm. "Then what are you doing just standing here? Come on, let's go!"
He resisted. "Not until you calm the motherfuck down, girl. Did you have too much Katnip?"
She gave him a sheepish look. "I might've had two or three…or seven."
Katnip was a candy brand that was sold in small plastic packets. It ws basically just flavored sugar crystals that were dyed brown. Nepeta was completely addicted to them, but they didn't help her hyperactivity issues at all. She spent practically all of her allowance on the candy and always kept at least five in her pockets at all times. Gamzee couldn't blame her. He was the same way with Faygo.
She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. She opened her eyes and looked up at him with a calm smile. "Can we go now?"
"Sure," he said, reaching out to rub her head and ruffle her hair.
The whole walk took about twenty minutes. The two chatted leisurely about school, ranging from the teachers to the homework. They were in first period history and third period gym together, but also had the same teachers for most of their other classes, even though they weren't together in them. Nepeta casually asked if she could spend the night at Gamzee's house, since her mom would be working the night shift.
"Yeah, motherfucker. But only if you can give me today's math notes," he responded, putting an arm around her shoulders and pulling her close to him.
They had known each other for as long as he could remember. Living across the street had been the main reason for it. When she wasn't doing errands for her mom or hanging out with Equius, she was definitely with Gamzee. His parents practically considered her part of the family with the amount of time she spent with them.
By then, they had arrived at his house. Actually, calling it a house wouldn't do it justice. It was a gigantic three-story mansion, complete with a vast lawn and a stone archways over the two front doors. The pathway up to the entrance Was lined on both sides by square hedges. The doors even had brass knockers in the shape of goat heads. He pulled out a key to unlock them and pulled one open.
The space beyond was known as the Grand Hall, and it definitely lived up to its name. It was a spacious expanse of tile floor leading to a staircase at the other end. The walls were dotted with podiums, each holding an expensive piece of pottery or artwork. There were multiple doors as well with bronze plaques indicating which room they led to. The ceiling was high and a chandelier hung halfway across the space, lighting the Grand Hall with fifty tiny bulbs and more crystals than anyone could count. It goes without saying that Gamzee's parents were completely loaded with cash.
As always, The clown-faced boy shrugged off his backpack and threw it to the side. It slid along the floor until it was stopped by a stone column. The maids that arrived at five would get it for him. Nepeta decided to keep her kitty-shaped bag as she followed him. Just like him, she was used the enormity of the mansion and already had the layout memorized, but she still chose to stick with him instead of going ahead. His pace was just so calm and collected that it soothed her sugar high.
The first stop he made was the five-star kitchen, which was kind of like his "zone." It had enough counter space to fit a killer whale, three side-by-side refrigerators, and every appliance that could even remotely be used to cook and/or prepare food. He set the pie down on the center island and opened one of the many draws, retrieving a knife. He popped the cover of the pie tin and cut out a small slice. Meanwhile, Nepeta went to one of the cabinets and pulled out a paper plate and plastic fork. It wasn't long before she was greedily eating her piece of the pastry, smiling at the deliciousness. Gamzee, on the other hand, walked over to one of the fridges and got out two fresh bottles of Faygo.
Nepeta finished her pie and moved to follow her friend once again. He led her to the living room, which contained a colossal TV and long couch that they crashed on.
It was around midnight when Gamzee made the choice to hit the hay. He and Nepeta had spent the first two hours watching cats on Animal Planet until she got bored. Another four were wasted both going head-to-head and working together on a few of his XBOX games. Somehow, she always got the upper hand in Call of Duty, but he had no hard feelings for her over it. It was just a game, after all. Additionally, they had ordered three large pizzas around 7 o' clock which they devoured while doing the homework for the next day. A mishap with a Faygo bottle exploding everywhere had resulted in both of them needing to change clothes. It was a good thing Nepeta always left a few outfits at his house, just in case. The rest of the night was occupied by Disney movies, watched in their PJs.
Gamzee let out a large yawn, stretching his arms out over his head. He looked down at his lap to see Nepeta's head resting there. She was wearing a green shirt and pajama pants with calls all over them, which his night clothing consisted of purple shorts and a plain white shirt. He sighed, smiling peacefully as he slipped his arms under her back and knees. He stood up slowly so he wouldn't wake her. Her only response was leaning her head against his chest and nuzzling him.
The trek to his room was a difficult one, with it being on the second floor; but, he eventually made it and opened the door. It was large, containing a king-sized bed and a twenty foot long black rug. His backpack rested on the floor to the right, next to the doorway to his walk-in closet. To the right was the entrance to his own personal bathroom, which was open and filling the room with a lemony fresh scent. Above was a whirling fan that never stopped spinning.
He walked through the dimly lit space and gently set Nepeta on the other side of the bed. He made sure to put her beneath the indigo blanket and sheets. Most people would see this as him taking advantage of her unconscious state, but he didn't. He knew that she would sleepwalk if he left her in a room by herself. Out of courtesy, he made it a point to stay as close to the bed's edge as possible.
"Goodnight, motherfucker," he whispered before falling asleep on top of the covers.