Greetings! Thank you for taking the time to read this and my story. I would be very grateful if you could review this story and give me feedback on it. It is my first time writing/publishing a fan fiction and would love to hear what people think and how i can improve
Thank you
Cynical's Awakening
CynicalWolf awoke with a start. He had been having a terrible nightmare that he was being chased by ponies. God he hated ponies. He looked around at his surroundings, They seemed...Different...Cartoon like. His head was pounding so he raised his hand to rub it. It took Cynical a few seconds to realize what was touching his head was not a hand, But a hoof. He slowly lowered his hand/hoof and looked at it. It was indeed a hoof, And instead of a normal arm it was a leg covered in Grey fur, With small patches of black. He slowly stood up, His head still pounding and immediately fell back down, Having tried to stand on two legs. He sighed to himself, And attempted to stand on four legs. Finding it surprisingly easy, He turned round to inspect the rest of himself. His coat, Like his arms was Grey with patches of black. He also saw that he had no cutie mark. His hair was a rusty red color that suited him in a way. From what the bronies on his Team Speak server he could tell he was an earth pony, With no wings or horn. Suddenly the terrifying realization dawned on him. He was a pony...In Equestria...THIS WAS THE WORST DAY EVER!
Arishri's Awakening
Arishri opened her eyes wide and sat straight up, Instantly regretting it. She had a splitting headache and as she raised her hand, That's when she noticed it. No longer was there a hand but a hoof. She stared at the hoof in shock, Refusing to believe what she was seeing. She looked down at the rest of herself seeing she was now a pony. Slowly she stood up on her new four hoofs, Finding it surprisingly easy and turned around to look at herself. She was a darkish blue color, With very pale orange stripes, With an aqua and ice white mane in a Vinyl Scratch style and a spiky tail of the same color. She saw with a pang of disappointment that she had no cutie mark. She sat down fighting back tears. Did she have no cutie mark because she was not worthy of one? Was she forever destined to be a blank flank? If Diamond Tiara or Silver Spoon made fun of her she would make sure they didn't live to see another day. She laid down on her back, As she still had a slight headache and felt something strange on her back. Standing up and looking round, And with a grin that would of made Pinkie Pie proud, She took of into the bright clear clue sky to test her new wings. But what she didn't see was how strange her wings were
BEST DAY EVER! She yelled before promptly crashing into a tree