Title: Strengths and Weaknesses
Author: SunReyes
Rating: T
Spoilers: Post Better Angels
There was something about being there, in LA, sitting on that very bench that stirred her heart more than anything. Maybe it was the words Jack had said to her, that he wanted this to work and he'd be anything she needed. It certainly made her heart soar. The kiss to, oh how she could still fill his lips on his and that tongue, just thinking about it made her entire body warm.
"We'll make this work," she breathed staring at him, knowing somehow it would have to work or she'd never recover. She loved him, plain and simple and admitting that she still felt something all those years wasn't easy for her earlier that day.
"We have to," Jack breathed knowing what was at risk. He had a greater understanding now than he did seven years ago. He was no longer married but the weight of what was happening rested heavily on his shoulders. It didn't help to know his daughter was coming to live with him. Another weight that he'd have to deal with. It helped to tell Samantha though and she took it far better than he ever expected.
"You and Hannah," it was as if she read his thoughts though she hadn't said nearly enough about his daughter after hearing what he'd told her, "you're going to need to spend time with her."
"I will." Jack nodded. There was no doubt he'd abandon his own flesh and blood, not again. He never wanted the girls to move to Chicago and of course the fights with Maria, they took a toll on him. He was getting older and felt ever the more lonely. It's why he was drawn towards her, Samantha. She was the one that made him feel alive, his heart would pound with each breath she'd take, watching her, studying her. The kisses they shared made him feel more alive. He loved her but constantly ended up losing her. He chose his wife, his family over her. He had to, did he regret it? He wasn't sure. He didn't want to lose Samantha, say goodbye to her, to what they shared but it was messy and complicated. He never intended it to be that way, those things just happened.
"You know," Samantha laughed having another bite of ice cream, "I'm not sure that you want to hear this," her eyes stared at him feeling his boaring through her. "I was like Hannah when I was younger. I had boyfriends my mother hated, I smoked pot when I was in high school. I wasn't the model citizen."
"You didn't turn out so bad," Jack breathed. It gave him a glimpse of hope, that Hannah would outgrow the stage and hopefully not wind up a pregnant teenager or something drastic. He didn't want to deal with that. In fact, he'd make sure she wouldn't be allowed to date until she was twenty-one if he had to.
"I'm sure there are plenty of people that would beg to differ," Samantha laughed. "I could talk to her?" Samantha had a feeling Jack's talking wouldn't really do much good. Not that she didn't have trust and faith in him but she didn't see a teenage girl wanting to confide in her father.
"You think that's such a hot idea?" Jack asked reaching for the spoon in her hand and guiding it into his mouth.
"Probably not," Samantha smiled knowing Hannah would instantly hate her. "I thought I'd offer though." She watched him lick the spoon clean and moved it back into the small bowl taking another bite. Letting out a soft breath she glanced from the bowl back up at Jack. She had her doubts about how anything would work between them with Hannah back in the picture. It was enough stress considering their jobs and him being her boss. That was complication one but Hannah, she was an even bigger one.
"What are you thinking?" Jack asked watching her intently knowing she always spoke her mind, at least to him.
"Does Hannah know who I am?" A flash of fear and concern etched across her face. It didn't go unnoticed by Jack.
His hand reached up, pushing a wayward strand of hair behind her ear, staring deep into her eyes. "You don't' have to worry."
It didn't exactly answer her question or her fears. "She knows about the affair then? That I was your mistress?" Samantha grimaced feeling the mood sour.
"The only one that knows it was you is me." Jack breathed.
"Maria knows," Samantha pointed out. "It was in the deposition, the entire divorce, you don't think Maria said anything to the girls?"
"I hadn't really considered it," Jack sighed. "So what if she knows. It just means I wasn't sleeping around. Clearly all these years later I'm still in love with the same woman." He smiled back with that boyish look that tended to melt her heart so easily.
"I don't think it quite works like that," Samantha shook her head. "She's going to hate me and I can't blame her. I'd hate me too for what I did to your family."
"Sam," Jack shook his head, letting out a sigh and scooting closer. He did not want her blaming herself for what happened. "It's all in the past now."
"It doesn't feel that way." She breathed staring at him, knowing the past was something that would resurface, it always did. Closing her eyes she let out a heavy breath, nervously chewing on her bottom lip.
Jack merely smiled watching her, his fingers moved out to touch her lip, seeing what she was doing and gently trying to stop her. He watched as her eyes opened and he saw so much doubt there, still lingering. His words though enough earlier to make her happy would never be enough. "I love you, you know that right?" He couldn't remember ever telling her as much in the past. It was an unspoken bond they'd shared, somehow it was easier without using the L word.
"I know," a tiny smile formed on her face. "I was just enjoying the warm breeze," Samantha answered feeling the smile growing on her face.
"So are you still mad at me, for dragging you 3,000 miles from home?" His fingers moved through her hair, nestled practically against her. He wanted to kiss her again. No that wasn't true. He wanted more than a kiss, to make love to her. He wasn't going to push his luck, just having things working between them was making him happy.
"We had a case to work," she stared at him, "somehow I don't think you could have managed to interview two suspects at once on your own."
"Hey!" Jack laughed sensing her sarcasm. "I could have interviewed them one right after the other." He wasn't letting her make any cheap shots at him, even in joking. He reached for the spoon, fighting it off her as best he could grimacing the moment the ice cream flew off the spoon and landed on her chest. "Oops."
"Oops is right," Samantha sighed, "you didn't happen to bring any napkins?" She didn't have a single one and tried wiping what she could with her fingers but it was sticky. Her mind flashed to a moment in the past where he'd have leaned forward and licked her clean but this was the here and now.
"Sorry," he flashed a boyish smiled at her, hoping she wasn't too upset. It was an accident and he really didn't want to ruin the mood.
"It's fine," she sighed not really upset just frustrated. He'd done that to her today and it hadn't completely settled. "No worse than the mess Finn leaves on my clothes."
"Comparing me to your son?" Jack laughed watching as she tried shaking some ice cream from her fingers. Reaching for her hand he guided the fingers to his lips, kissing them, sucking each one for a few seconds to get the ice cream and the stickiness off.
"Yeah well he wouldn't have done that." Samantha grinned, "then again." She put the rest of the container on the ground, not wanting another mess. Turning towards him, her hands moved through his hair, staring deep into his eyes. There was still so much she wanted to say, to convey to him but no words would come.
"Making sure to get any last remnants of ice cream in my hair?" Jack grinned. "Is that for earlier?" He knew she wasn't completely over their fight. She wanted to be and God did he ever want it to be in the past but he had the sneaking suspicion dragging her away for a vacation wasn't the best idea.
"Maybe," Samantha laughed staring at his lips. A smile growing on her face. She wanted to kiss him again but she knew constantly doing that would complicate matters, wanting more between them. Maybe it could have happened if Hannah wasn't coming back into the picture but she honestly didn't see how the four of them could live happily ever after. Of course she wanted a happy ending but her life, it wasn't that way. It had never been.
Jack leaned in, seeing her eyes focusing on his mouth. He wanted nothing more than to kiss the doubts away and leaned in, hoping this time it wouldn't take her by surprise. It didn't either. Her eyes closed feeling his warm breath mixed with hers. His tongue pushing its way past her lips as they drank each other in. He could still taste the ice cream but it was growing fainter now.
He didn't know how much time passed as they kissed like two teenagers in love. Sitting on the bench, it was reminiscent of a time when their relationship had ended on a bench. Now it was beginning, all over again.
"Promise me something," she pulled back, feeling slightly out of breath. Her heart pounded and she guided his hand over it, wanting him to feel the effect he still had on her. Years could pass but it never mattered, the feelings were always there and would always be.
"Anything," Jack breathed without thinking twice. He nodded staring at her, moving his other hand to rest on her thigh. He wanted to touch her and craved every opportunity he had. At work they had to be careful and cautious. Here though, in LA, no one would recognize them. They were safe.
"You'll give it 110% with Hannah."
Jack stared at her, wondering how the conversation turned back to his daughter." He nodded slowly, "yeah, of course." He had his own doubts about raising a daughter on his own, especially one that had become unruly lately according to Maria.
"I was serious when I told you earlier you can do anything you set your mind to."
"Does that include winning you back?" Jack wasted no time in admitting what he wanted.
"I'm your safety net," she breathed knowing all along what he was to her.
"I don't see how that's possible, Sam." Jack shook his head. "I may come to you when things get rough, you're my constant, the one thing that keeps me sane but my safety net?" He smiled, "we tend to screw things up all over the place."
"That's not what I meant," she rolled her eyes smiling at him feeling both of his hands now resting on her thighs. She let out a breath feeling her body warming up to his touch and wanting more than just another intense kiss. She knew he wanted it to. It'd been clear to her for weeks now.
"Then tell me," Jack whispered staring back at her. Slowly his hands moved in soft motions over her thighs. He could hear her whimper in protest. She wanted to stay strong, keep him at arms length because she worried he'd only hurt her again but her resolve was crumbling and the kisses, his breath, the way he was staring at her, not to mention his words, she was falling for him all over again.
"It doesn't matter," she smiled not really wanting to think about it. She knew he chose her when his marriage was falling apart. When he was weak, she made him strong. It worked both ways but when he ended it, she felt as though he'd taken her strength with him.
"Tell me," he breathed leaning in kissing her neck watching her shiver.
"Jack," she moaned knowing what he was doing to her. It worked so well in the past to get her to admit to anything. She shifted on the bench already feeling restless. Her body bumped against his and he smiled knowing the affect he still had on her, it made him feel good too. After a beat she felt his kisses moving from her neck down between her breasts. She didn't care that they were in public. It was dark, no one was around. "Licking the ice cream off now?" She smiled moving her fingers through his hair.
"Just helping you relax. Tell me, Sam." He wanted to know what she was thinking, feeling. He wanted to know her every desire and dream for the future. He wanted to be there with her, every step of the way.
"I make you strong," she whispered, licking her suddenly dry lips. "It's why you choose me when things are tough."
His kisses paused between her breasts, thinking about her words. He'd never considered the possibility. He always thought about it more as an escape from the pain, an escape from the reality that he was facing. She made him happy.
"Why are you stopping?" She smiled tilting her head down watching his lips move. "I didn't just insult your ego or something, did I?" She hadn't been trying to tell him he was weak but it was in his moments of weakness he chose her. It was when he was conflicted and had trouble dealing with life that he came to her to seek out something greater.
"I think you may be right." Jack breathed staring at her, "you make me stronger." His breath moved to tickle her lips, not kissing her though. He just stared deep into her eyes. Her hand moved towards his head, pressing their foreheads together. She wanted to feel connected to him any way she could.