You know how they say people with piercing blue eyes are angels in disguise? I once knew a girl with piercing blue eyes. They were beautiful. Full of life. They sparkled in the sunlight and shone in the moonlight and you could see them from a mile away.
And she was truly an angel. She was beautiful. Gentle. Kind. Loving… Everything a servant of God's should be. She loved God. She dedicated every thought, every blink, every breath to Him. She prayed, not the wrote prayers children are made to memorize and recite in class, but true, honest prayers from the heart.
She prayed for peace. For justice. For broken hearts and shattered souls. But she never said a prayer for herself. Not once did she send a thought to God for her own sake. "To do so would be selfish," she once said, "There are so many people in the world worse off than I. They need God more."
But she herself did need God. She needed prayers like everyone else. So I prayed for her. I prayed for her innocent heart. I prayer for her immaculate soul. And I prayed for her angel eyes. But I should have prayed harder.
She lost her faith one day. She watched as everyone she loved and everyone she had prayed for was slaughtered right in front of her angel eyes. And her angel eyes shed angel tears. I blame myself. I should have been able to help her, but I didn't have the faith. I never did. She had her religion. I had her. Perhaps, indirectly, I was a follower of God, but that wasn't good enough, and He ruined her life just to show me that.
After that day, her eyes never sparkled in sunlight or shone in moonlight. They only glisten with tears. They became gray and clouded and hardened. Does that mean she fell from grace? Am I to blame?
I should have prayed harder…
~*~*~*~
"Just as soon as I belong, it's time I disappear…"
Fated to die an early and tragic death.
Again, and again, and again…