Oh, my word! Have you any idea how jerkish you feel choosing a faction other than the one your family comes from? Do you ever stop and think about how you're abandoning your family and treating them like they didn't even take care of you through the messy youth years of your life?

Watching my dark red hand blood drip into the bowl of broken glass was like watching my rebellion drip onto the face of my father, like, "Muahahahaha, Poppykins! Thou shalt suffer my wrath! I hate thee like I hate peanut butter on olives!" Not that I hate my father. He never really made enough allowances for me, that's all. I mean, he was always telling me to shut up and behave and not speak my mind and be one hundred percent self-controlled. Living with him was like living in a straightjacket.

I honestly wish my mother had been bossier towards and around my father. She claimed she'd wanted to "keep the peace", but at what point does keeping the peace cease to be peaceful? Seriously, if she truly wanted peace, she might as well have let truth slip in once in a while.

Choosing Candor was quite the leap. All I knew had been Amity- that is, if you could call my father's domineering household roles Amiable and kind. Everyday, he would say, "Now, Lennon, don't say anything insulting today. Remember what happened your kindergarten year." Even in secondary school, I would go through my classes remembering the stuff I'd said in kindergarten, and how my father would spank me just because I told some sort of unpleasant truth. The funny thing is, everyone looked down on my father for being so harsh.

Which is why he hated my truth telling, because he didn't want his cover as a great Amity guy blown to smithereens.

Throughout this whole time, my mother and older sister Whippoorwill (the name suited her; seriously, before she learned how to whistle, she would make a variety of squealing, hooting sounds) would watch and would not be helpful at all. Maybe my mother was helpful- she knew ways of calming down my father. She had a zenful air about her. I only wish she had stood up for herself more, and put her calmness to good use. She was definitely better than Whippoorwill, who would scold me everyday, calling me her "devil brother", and telling me to clean her room for her.

To be perfectly honest, I think three of the four people in my family really didn't fit in at Amity. I postulate that the only reason Whippoorwill stayed was because of some ugly guy whom she thought was attractive. Mom had warned her about attractive guys, calling them useless for determining one's future.

Anyway, my aptitude test had said I was "prominently" Candorous in my mind, soul, and behavior. (Prominently? Does that mean I have aptitude for other factions? Of course, every idiot knows that "Divergent" folk do not exist, and every Candor member learns when a non-idiot goes about saying such claims). This came as absolutely no surprise to me.

So, before I knew what I was doing, I was on the way to escaping my strict father, only latently helpful mother, and shallow slavemistress of a sister. I became a Candor initiate, riding on the bus to the Merciless Mart and the creepy barracks underneath it where they force initiates to spend their woeful nights.

The whole way there, despite how everyone else loved the sounds of their voices, I was quiet. I was too busy pondering over the morality of my faction choice, of whether or not I should have stayed with my family. They never treated me well, but aren't you supposed to go extra miles and turn the other cheek? I thought to myself there's a fine line between doing the right thing and keeping yourself in an abusive situation. But still… Why did I feel such a guilty ache inside?

It was when the bus stopped and all of the Candor initiates advanced in a disorganized blob to the Merciless Mart when I started talking.

You see, this handsome fellow with shaggy brown hair and a curved nose, garbed in Abnegation gray, handed me a dinner roll.

"You look famished," he said.

"Where'd you get the food?" I asked.

"There were pastries and buns and breads out in the reception hall," he said. "I took some, just in case someone needed a little something along the way."

"There's a reception after the Choosing? How come I never heard about this?!"

"Nobody ever attends, except Abnegationers who think ahead."

The Abnegation fellow smiled.

"You're from Abnegation?" I asked. "How come… if you don't mind my asking, because this might or might not be a rude question… how come you don't have short hair?"

He shrugged.

"I dunno," he said. "I guess I've been so busy, I forgot. My moms didn't care."

Into the Merciless Mart we all walked, all of us initiates, ready to meet our future.

"Walk this way," said the tired-looking lady who had led us all to the bus and the Merciless Mart. "Now that you're finally here and have made it into the wonderful vicinity of Candor, I don't need to supervise you. You'll now be turned over to Sally."

Out from a trapdoor appeared a middle-aged woman with her hair in a tight bun held in place by lethally sharp chopsticks.

"Hi!" she said gleefully, waving rapidly. "I'm so happy to be the initiate counselor and supervisor for this year! I've always wanted this job! I mean, I've also always wanted to make the ice cream, also, and be a lawyer. Of course, I was too lazy to be the latter, but just hardworking enough to go through the training necessary to take care of all of you all. Anyway, welcome to Candor!"

She commenced to say a long, perky speech, which, regrettably, to this day, I do not remember all of. The gist though, was that we had to be prepared to be more honest than we've ever been before, and that we should expect to find a safe place for a diverse crowd of people to speak their minds. She also started talking about ice cream, which is something I've only eaten once or twice. She seemed quite excited about that particular dessert.

Sally then led everyone down the trapdoor, down a short ladder and a long flight of stairs into the basement where the initiate barracks were.

"Of course, unlike those pervert Dauntlesses," Sally said, "the barracks will be divided by sex. Also, you are confined to the barracks from the nighty-night bell till the bell that sounds like a rooster crowing. Man, I hate that rooster!"

"Because it wakes you up every morning?" a blonde girl in an Erudite blue skirt and blouse asked.

"No," Sally replied. "It's because it's a fake rooster. It's like someone is lying to us, pretending there's a real rooster lurking about. Now, everyone, as a first little introduction to initiation, let's all sit down in a circle like a bunch of grade schoolers, and, going counterclockwise, we'll each say our names and something that we feel is personal and private, starting with me. My name is Sally, and I didn't stop wetting the bed till I was sixteen. Now, your turn."

Sitting next to Sally was the Erudite girl who had asked about the fake rooster.

"My name is Alexandra," she said, "and… I still haven't returned a library book, and it looks like I never will. I mean, it was an accident- I just forgot about it, and…"

"You don't need to worry about explaining yourself," Sally said perkily. "Next!"

A dark-haired girl next to Alexandra, a Candor-born initiate, said, "My name's Elizabeth, and I still egg the houses of people I hate."

"You've gotten better at tackling your problem, though," Sally said. "I remember when you were thirteen, and that bad habit of yours got all started. Anyway, next!"

One thing I noticed easily was that the Candor-born initiate's private and personal snippets of information were almost always more shocking and embarrassing than those of the nonCandor-born initiates.

It was my turn to speak.

"My name is Lennon," I started.

"What an interesting name!" Sally interrupted.

"Thanks," I replied, awkwarded out. "I was named after a peaceful guy from one of the past centuries in semi-forgotten history. Apparently, he was also blatantly honest. Speaking of blatantly honest, I guess I should say some personal info. Um… I really am not sure if Candor is the faction for me. I don't think I'd fit in with any faction."

"Of course you'll fit in," said Elizabeth. "If you didn't, your aptitude test would have made you factionless."

"What Elizabeth is trying to say is," Sally said, "welcome to the Candor family. Or, if you prefer it to not sound so lovey dovey, there's a place for you in our collective!" She smiled merrily. "Next!"

The Abnegation fellow whom I had talked to on the way inside the Merciless Mart was sitting next to me. He pushed some of his hair out of his eyes.

"Hi," he said, "my name is Matthew. My piece of embarrassing information is that, at the moment, I'm still getting over some athlete's foot. In a few days, I'll probably be all better, though."

"Ew!" several initiates said, making faces and looking truly disturbed.

I couldn't help but laugh. Matthew looked at me and smiled.

After our rousing period of "circle time", we went back up the stairs and out of the trapdoor, down winding hallways, and into a humongous room. I suspected this must be the main area of the Merciless Mart, where all of Candor's hullubaloo occurs. Right in the center of the room was the symbol of Candor, weight measuring scales, painted for everybody to walk over and ponder at its significance. Standing on the scales painting was a man who looked an awful lot like my father. That got me wondering…

Rows of seats had been placed in front of that man, and all of the initiates and Sally sat down.

"Good day to you all," the man standing on the scales said. "Oh, what the hey! It's been a terrible day for me. I've been stressed out of my mind. So, in my instance, I guess you can all say 'Bad day to you'. Anyway, my name is Jack Kang…"

Kang?! I thought. That's the same last name as me! Oh, my goodness… Could…? Could he…?

Jack Kang continued, "I am the representative leader here at Candor. If you're all wondering, yes, I am a transfer. Going from Dauntless to Candor was like going from a bad sci-fi series military organization to a corporate fashion version of Whitby Gothic Weekend. My twin brother transferred to Amity. I don't see why he did that; I mean, he's such a jerk."

His twin brother transferred to Amity?! The cogs in my head were grinding and rolling.

Jack Kang then said, "Anyway, that's just a little honesty from me, not that it's any of your business. Still, thought I should get you used to hearing that sort of stuff. You'll hear plenty of things you never imagined you would throughout your initiation, which will mostly consist of truth telling and lie detecting exercises. I know you're apprehending it, but… Oh, look! It's almost time for dinner! Cafeteria is down hallway C, take a right at the intersection, then a left at the next, and go down the dead end. Choose door number two, not number one. Have fun learning to be Candor!"

Sally led all of us initiates to the cafeteria. After getting out food (which, ironically, was mostly black and white), most of the nonCandor-born initiates sat at the same table- there weren't many of us. I sat between Matthew and Alexandra.

I picked at my black beans with my fork. Suddenly, I felt the sharp pang of homesickness. What had I done, transferring factions? Was I truly so discontent with my family that I would leave behind the only home I've known? Was I truly so lonely that I never thought I'd leave behind anyone who actually cared?

"Yoo-hoo!" I heard Alexandra say. "Lennon, snap out of it! You're staring off into space."

"Sorry," I muttered.

"I was asking you if you had any siblings," she said. She took a bite out of her white bread covered in black jam.

"Oh…" I was quiet for a second. "I have an older sister named Whippoorwill."

"Where you and her close?"

"No… I'm sorry. I should be more enthusiastic. It's just been a funny day, that's all."

"No problem."

"So… Have you got siblings?"

"Two brothers, Nicholas and Frederick. They were always teasing me. Frederick transferred to Abnegation, which started quite a stir in the Erudite community. I'm sure you're aware of the growing tensions between Abnegation and Erudite…"

"I remember meeting Frederick once," Matthew said quietly. "He helped me pick up cans of food that'd spilled out of my shopping bag. I knew his name, because his transferring certainly didn't stir up just the Erudites."

"Do you have brothers or sisters?" Alexandra asked.

"No," Matthew replied. "I hung out with my neighbors a lot, though, so I feel like they're my brothers and sisters. It's gotten weird since two of them started liking each other, though. It wouldn't have been right to tell them how awkward those two have made it, because it would be self-centered of me. Still, I think I'm not alone in my discomfort."

"Did they do their Choosing today?" I asked.

"No." Matthew scratched his nose. "They're all about a year younger than me. I'm pretty sure most of them are gonna transfer. I mean, Beatrice obviously doesn't fit in at Abnegation- she's too adventurous. Most think her brother is a perfect model of selflessness, but I remember seeing textbooks he'd hidden under his bed and behind his dresser. I don't know how I noticed it, but he obviously hungers after knowledge."

"Let me guess," Alexandra said, "the textbook hoarder is one of the lovers?"

"Yup. He and Susan give each other the eye often, which is the Abnegation equivalent of PDA."

I laughed.

"That's so pitiful!" I said. "I mean, back in Amity, people weren't so finicky about what affection was and wasn't shown in public. I mean, there were definite limits, but it wasn't like walking through a no-kissing zone."

Matthew and Alexandra laughed back.

"Apparently," Alexandra said, "Candor people are not opposed to a variety of PDA types."

"Neither are Dauntless," said a Dauntless-born initiate sitting across from us. Her name was Joan, and she had short black hair and chocolate-colored eyes. She was very robust looking, and kind of scared me. I was certain she could beat me to a pulp.

She obviously noticed my fear.

"Cute Amity boy," she said. "Scared of the warrior girl?"

"By the way," Alexandra asked, "Matthew, Lennon, are you two gonna stay pacifists, now that you've left your old factions?"

I felt horrified. Looking over at the look on Matthew's face, I saw he felt the same.

"Why wouldn't we?" I asked. "You don't just reject old beliefs just because you moved somewhere else. I've always believed in honesty, despite my upbringing, and I've always believed in peace, along with my upbringing."

"I don't see how honesty and peace can go hand in hand," Alexandra said. "That's okay for you to think that way, I guess."

Matthew said, "You don't have to pick fights with your words just to be honest. There are ways of kindly telling the truth."

Joan said, "Whatever. Now that I'm in Candor, I'm gonna say what I want to. Lenny and Matt, you both look like a woosies who've been raised to wimp out all the time. Lenny, your eyes look funny, and Matt, you've got a large nose."

After dinner, and a lengthy tour around the Merciless Mart (which I'm sure only increased my possibilities of getting lost), Sally and a man named Brendon (Seriously? This is why you have to be careful what you name your kids! Brendon is not a name for a grown man!) led all of us initiates back to the barracks.

Brendon led the boys into their specific section. It was one long room full of beds on either side with white or black blankets. Almost everything was black and white- white walls, black floors and ceilings, black or white beds, and white bottles with black labels of freshening spray in case one of the initiates turns out to be a bed wetter. (After some further research, I have an educated hunch that bed wetting is the bane of Candor). On each wall were two large, black and white clocks.

"The bedtime bell is about to sound," Brendon said. "There should be a bed for each of you. You are not permitted to leave these rooms at night except in cases of needing to use the bathroom, which can be found in the hallway right outside this room. Seriously, please don't leave for trivial purposes. We weren't this controlling until that one year when kids started wrecking havoc due to a Dauntless-born initiate. Now, we'll trust none of you until you walk and talk and laugh and squawk the path of truthfulness. Anyway, nighty-night. See you in the morning. I'll be in the room next door in case you have some sort of emergency. I remember one year, this one kid was having an allergic reaction to something in the pillow, causing himself to puff up as large as the Hulk, and then he…"

Nobody heard the rest of Brendon's story, because, by then, he had walked out of the room.

We all each chose a bed. I chose one somewhere around the middle of the room. On each bed were black pajamas. I assume there were no white pajamas because of bed wetting. After changing into our pajamas, the nonCandor-born guys put their day clothes in a basket that had been set beside the door. Supposedly, a laundry person was going to replace our clothes with Candor ones.

"I'm not even tired," I blurted out. "I mean, I'm exhausted, but I won't be able to sleep a wink tonight."

"No kidding," an Erudite transfer, Sigurd, said. "I can't wait for tomorrow. I know it sounds silly and childish, but I'm dying to know what we'll all be doing tomorrow. I mean, I know it's going to involve telling the truth, but still."

"We'll probably start tomorrow by playing Truth," Rashad, a Candor-born initiate, said. "It's like Truth or Dare, except only with Truth. My brother went through initiation a couple years ago, and said that's what everyone started with, mostly games."

"That's what Elizabeth said," Matthew blurted out. He then looked embarrassed. "I mean, I overheard her say it. I shouldn't have eavesdropped, but she talks so loudly…"

"I wouldn't blame you for listening to Elizabeth," Rashad replied. "She can speak her mind about any subject any day."

"You're just saying that because you've had a crush on her for the past three years," Warner, another Candor-born initiate, said teasingly.

Rashad laughed.

"Hey now," he said, "she's a fine lady, and I wouldn't mind it if she said yes to my date offer. Despite her anger problems, she has a big heart. Also, there aren't very many gals around who are that tall and with such a magnificent frame. Also, you can't joke about Elizabeth after Talia turned you down by insulting your favorite comic series."

Warner laughed.

"Painful!" he said. "Utterly painful!"

Rashad looked over at Sigurd.

"What?" Sigurd asked, starting to laugh. "You think I'll tell you her name?"

"Come on. I know you like someone. Tell us who she is." Rashad smiled mischievously at Sigurd.

"Okay, okay." Sigurd gave in. "My mom has this best friend, and I would play with her daughter when I was little. So, we've pretty much known each other in forever. Anyways, I stopped hanging out with her after starting middle school, because we got different friends. Then, last year, it's like she turned into some sort of divine being. She's so gorgeous, with lovely large teeth and flowing golden hair. Her eyes are like two pools of chocolate, and her laugh is like listening to a bird song."

"Did you ask her out?" Warner asked.

"Yeah…" Sigurd sighed woefully.

"She liked another guy?" Rashad asked.

"No," Sigurd replied. "She just told me I wasn't smart enough for her. I think she's sapiosexual. I mean, of course she would be! She chose to stay in Erudite at the Choosing!"

"Are all Erudites like that?" I asked, somewhat weirded out.

"Maybe." Sigurd shrugged his shoulders. "I can't understand them sometimes, even though I've lived with them for so long. I like the idea of learning as much as possible, but the snobbery they have is just too overwhelming. Also, almost everyone, even the 20-20 folks, wear glasses. Why wear glasses when you don't need them? For smart people, they do dumb stuff."

"It's an unnecessary adornment," Matthew said, "meant to draw attention to oneself."

"Speaking of drawing attention," Rashad said, "you're certainly the quiet one."

"Not really." Matthew shrugged. "I was always chattier than any Abnegation child should be."

"That, and your hair," I said. "Any other ways you were different?"

"I accidentally tripped on the way up to the Torah on my bar mitzvah. None of the other boys tripped. I guess I trip a lot during important events, which draws a lot of attention to myself."

"Other boys?" Warner asked. "A lot of boys come of age at the same time in Abnegation?"

"No," Matthew replied. "We just get our ceremonies done at the same time, to draw the least amount of attention to ourselves."

"Amity was like that," I said. "The main difference, though, was that we did it to get a sense of community, not to draw away attention. At the Amity church, babies get dedicated in groups. I was dedicated with my sister, even though she's a couple of years older than me."

Matthew said, "Amity sounds wonderful. If the community was so tight-knit, though, why'd you leave it? Was it too tight-knit, without privacy?"

"No," I replied. "It's… something personal."

"Well, you're in the right place for personal," Sigurd said. "Spill the beans, brother."

"If I'd stayed in Amity," I said, "I would have to be in the same community as my family, and they haven't always been there for me."

"Wasn't anyone in your family nice?" Rashad asked.

"My mother was, but she was a push-over," I answered. "She was the sweetest lady around, but she let my father punish me over silly things. I remember getting spanked hard for telling someone I didn't enjoy her singing voice. Whippoorwill always sided with my father. It became apparent that most everybody in Amity disapproved of my father, but they didn't seem to want to do anything any time soon. They're too nice to punish cruel people."

"Politely saying you don't like someone's singing voice is not good grounds for spanking a child," Rashad said. "I mean, if the child is a total brat and has been told several times to stop screaming in the store, that's different. I remember my mom giving me several swats in one day for throwing tantrums in public."

"Candor parents spank their kids in public?" Sigurd looked shocked.

"They've got no reason to hide the fact that they discipline their kids." Rashad shrugged.

"Do the abusive parents hide how they punish their kids?" Sigurd asked. "I mean, my aunt and uncle would have never confessed beating their kids. It took people years to figure that out, and only after the kids left Erudite and told everyone."

"I like to think they don't," Warner said. "Of course, there are bad apples in Candor. We call them the Fibbers. Thanks to them, the Candor community still has problems."

"I think back in Abnegation there was at least one case of abusive parenting," Matthew muttered. "Not even the kid blurted it out, but, somehow the word spread. The abuser though was an important member of the community, though, so people didn't pay much attention to the scandal. Oh, which one was it? He was one of the really high up there guys…"

We all stayed up late talking. Our subjects of conversation ranged from personal anecdotes to science to fuzzy slippers to Abnegation girls who try to look plain and unattractive but it just doesn't work to different shades of the color blue to teddy bears.

Eventually, though, our conversation grew quiet, and we lay back in our beds, our eyelids drooping down.

Someone turned off the light.

That's when we finally fell asleep, recharging for tomorrow.