A/N: No, I am not dead actually, although several people probably might have thought so by now. I was just hit by a pretty bad writer's block. But I seem to have gotten out of it now. This story was inspired by all the perfect first dates, first times, first everything's we - the writers - have sent them on over the years. It's supposed to be funny, I hope that shines through somehow.
They had been working towards that moment probably their entire friendship. And after six years, one Kevin Lynch, one near death experience for each of them and several team alternations later they finally made it. Although neither of them probably had expected their first date to head to anywhere near what it was heading for right now. Disaster.
They had arranged that he would pick her up at 7pm sharp, but he was nearly an hour late, due to some accident on one of the roads and him being right in the middle of it, with no way back or forth for an uncertain time. He of course had called her, letting her know he wasn't sure how long this would take for him to get out of. Around 8 he finally made it to her place, with their reservation at the restaurant of course gone. Given it was Saturday night there would be little to no chance to get a table anywhere soon. So they came up with another idea for their date. Which they would need to change yet again, due to the choice of movies on offer at the cinema were only a horror flick and some documentary about Wormholes. All other options were booked out. Since none of the two movie choices appealed to either Morgan or Penelope new plans needed to be made.
"Maybe, Hot Stuff, we should just … postpone that date to next week or so…" Penelope started to wonder, getting Derek to turn around and look surprised.
"No way. I have been waiting way too long for this date and not so I can just postpone it," Derek protested. There was no way he would wait for another first date with her. He had wanted her since six years and was actually amazed himself they finally managed to get it all together to go on a date.
Penelope looked at him for a moment, thinking. "Okay, how about we go home then and work it from there. I'm sure my fridge has something we can use for dinner. It might not be the usual first date, but it's a start," she smiled at Derek, who thought about her proposition for a moment.
"Sounds like a plan, but let it be my place. From experience I know that your fridge doesn't hold much that could be used for cooking up a dinner," he smiled at her before pulling her closer to himself, kissing her forehead and then continued towards the car.
A little less than 15 minutes later they pulled up into his driveway and despite this date having been somewhat of less than perfect, Derek tried to make the best of it. Holding open doors, helping her out of the car, out of her coat or any other of these little things that showed her he paid at least attention, even if everything else seemed to have gone so terribly wrong tonight.
Morgan poured them a glass of wine to start with and then got started on their dinner. It wasn't any secret that Morgan was an excellent chef, whereas Penelope could do as much as boiling an egg or make some toast, but that was as far as her culinary skills went.
Another ten minutes later and according to Morgan all had been set. The rest would be done by the oven and they would have at least another twenty minutes before dinner was ready. It was getting close to 9pm by now and Penelope had to admit, she slowly started to get hungry.
"How about we have some cheese for now? That would go rather well with the wine and you also wouldn't have to wait so long to get some food," Morgan suggested and Penelope euphorically nodded. By now she would have probably agreed to anything as long as it would consider as food.
Bringing their wine glasses to the living room, where Penelope was waiting, as well as some cheese, he placed the plate in front of Penelope and was about to set the wine glasses next to it when his movements all of a sudden had been too quick and the contents of wine glass landed on her white dress, leaving big, red stains.
The shock must have been written all over his face, since Penelope was the first to speak, taking it rather with humor. What other choice did she have? It wasn't as if he had planned this or anything.
"If that is a way of getting me out of my clothes I can think of several better ones," she smiled at him, knowing that he right now probably felt like crawling under a rock.
"I guess it isn't working then," Derek replied, a smile on his lips as well, not sure what was going on tonight. He never had been further off his A-game than tonight.
"No, but I'll send you my dry cleaners bill," she laughed, glad they both could still laugh about it. "I guess tonight somehow isn't working out as planned, huh?" she asked, with a grin, taking the towel Morgan was holding towards her in order to safe some of the white fabric from reddening.
"No, somehow this all went all terribly wrong. Maybe we should have just postponed this date as you initially suggested and hoped for a better development for the next one," he smiled, not sure he still was able to see the good in this. It all had gone wrong at the same time, making this officially the worst date he had been on. Not because of the person, hell no, Penelope was the best of companies he could ever think of, but due to the circumstances.
"Hmm … well, now that we made it that far and started having some sort of a date let's just see how the rest develops and take it from there," she smiled, patting the spot on the couch next to her, waiting for Morgan to sit down.
She decided it was now or never and leaped forward, surprising Morgan with her action and knocking him over, having him lay on the couch with her on top of him. Her lips landed on his, kissing him at first softly and somewhat hesitantly, testing the waters and him. She felt him respond, their kisses becoming more demanding and passionate with each moment that past, having Penelope pull herself further into Morgan's body, liking the heat that radiated off him.
Morgan deepened the kiss, liking the feeling of her lips on his more every minute. They were soft as velvet and tender, just like he always imagined them to be and pulled her closer against his body, pulling her into a kiss that spiraled quickly into a deep, tongue-thrusting battle of dominance.
Her hands were roaming all over him, pushing further into the kiss, wanting, needing more. And it seemed like it was the same for him if his hands were any indication. They travelled up and down her back, her arms and cupped her ass hard, before sliding down over the top of her thighs and then back again. Her hands had a tour all of themselves, brushing over clothe covered muscles and skin, letting them roam up and down his rock hard body, moaning into the kiss and pressing herself further into him, wanting to be as close as possible.
At some point they traveled under his shirt, feeling now the heat radiating from his skin and making her shiver. This was going to be so good. His lips moved to her throat, licking, kissing, and sucking. And she was sure that one of these would leave a mark. His hands pushed her further against him until there was no space left and she was fully plastered against him.
Her hand still roaming all over his body she all of a sudden reached down, feeling the evidence of how much he wanted her, desired her. This certainly was going to be good, especially if size of his bulge was any indication.
His lips left hers, travelling along her jaw, her throat and up again, sucking and kissing their way up and down, while his hands were still busy roaming her body.
"I think this first date just got a whole of a lot better," he smiled against her skin.
"Oh, baby, you have no idea how much better this all is about to get in just a moment's time," she smiled wickedly at him, and a moment later he felt her hand at the waistband of his jeans. He felt her fingers working the button and a moment later they started on the zipper, brushing ever so lightly – intentionally or not, who knew? – against the ever so growing bulge hidden underneath the zipper.
His hands in the meantime found their way underneath the skirt of Penelope's dress, pushing the soft fabric up until his hands laid on her lace-covered derriere. Rubbing his hands up and down her thighs, massaging softly her butt, he heard Penelope moan into the kiss, while she still seemed to try getting him out of his jeans. And just a moment later, he heard her curse, making him break the kiss.
"Are you okay?" he asked, wondering what got her to curse. One look at her and he knew something was not right. "What is it?"
"I think your boxer shorts got … stuck in your zipper. It isn't moving an inch up or down," she explained, straight faced, but only seconds later had to burst out laughing. When Morgan started laughing as well, they both knew this evening just wasn't supposed to get any better. Penelope buried her face in his chest, not able to stop laughing and by now even hiccupping from the laughter. At least they laugh about it.
"I guess this officially makes it the worst date ever. I planned it all so perfectly … " Morgan started, wondering if there was actually anything left to go wrong.
"Certain things you just can't plan, Hot Stuff," Penelope still giggled.
"Why don't we just eat, and call it a night, maybe giving this all another try next week?" Penelope asked and Morgan just nodded. "Okay, let's eat th-…" she slowly got up, interrupting for a moment. "What's that smell?"
A second later the fire alarm went off, making both of them run for the kitchen. Opening the oven, they had to see that all that was left of their dinner could be only classified as a lump of coal. At best. By now Penelope wasn't hungry anymore anyway, she just started laughing once more.
"How about I give you a lift home, Goddess and we get some takeaway on the way? How does that sound?" Morgan asked, seeing Penelope nod and walking after her towards his car.
When they made it to her place half an hour later, Morgan brought her up to her apartment.
"Is there even any point in me asking for another date?" he asked somewhat fidgeting nervously in front of her door, when he was about to say 'goodnight'.
Penelope just looked at him for a moment pitifully, knowing full well that a date like they had tonight could be the death of every guy's self-esteem.
"I'd love to," she just answered, pulled him in and gave him a kiss. At least that part of their date had worked out rather well for both of them so far.
Their second date was a week later, and this time it all went just as planned and was simply perfect.
*-*-*-*-* The End *-*-*-*-*-*