Title: The Date
Author(s): FelsGoddess
Timeframe: Sometime after NJO
Characters: Wedge, Iella, Syal
Genre: humor
Keywords:
Summary: It's the night of Syal's first date. What's a father to do?
Notes: Written for the funny quote challenge.
45. Whatever it is - I didn't do it!
Today was the first day of the end of my life. Syal went on her first date. Iella knew about it days in advance, I'm sure of it. She seemed too sure, too calm about the whole ordeal. The way she casually mentioned it while I was cleaning dishes was just too sly. One day before the date is not enough warning. I need weeks to prepare myself and to get rid of the boy.
His name was Tarq Lintz. What kind of name is that? His father was a small claims lawyer. I already didn't like him. They met at school. I knew we should have homeschooled the girls. You can't meet boys at home. I wanted to put a stop to it, but Iella threatened me not to harm the poor boy. I thought about calling Han Solo for advice about dealing with your daughter's boyfriend, but changed my mind when I realized that he would be hardly sympathetic to the man who somewhat encouraged the whole relationship.
That reminds me, I need to go out tomorrow and buy him a bottle of nice whiskey as an apology.
Instead, I visited my old friends Wes, Tycho and Hobbie. I knew they would be sympathetic to my plight. See, Syal had grown up around these men. They were like her uncles. All three of them were against the idea of her dating. We decided that Tarq was up to no good and needed stopped. We never quite figured out how, though.
At least, I didn't.
The dreaded night of the date arrived. Syal walked out into the living room in a skirt that exposed her calves. I told her to change; Iella overturned me. I was reduced to sitting in my chair that I had so pain-stalkingly angled to face the doorway and glaring. I spent a couple hours that afternoon practicing effective hurt-her-and-die glares. I took my position and waited for the blasted doorbell to ring.
Tarq appeared right one time. He acted all polite, which had to be an act. I saw past that nice jacket and combed hair. Whom did he think he was fooling?
Like any caring, considerate father, I insisted upon seeing the speeder to make sure it was safe. The boy told me his was being repaired and his father had allowed him to borrow the family's vehicle. We all walked down to the garage. It was nice I had to admit. It was a black Nexus. Yeah, those speeders, the kinds that beings drool over. My daughter was going to be joyriding with this kid.
I checked the speeder thoroughly, hoping to find something wrong with it. No such luck. The kids climbed in and took off within ten minutes. I almost asked Iella if she had ran intelligence on him, but I knew that would only result in a chewing out.
We went back up to our apartment. I played some game with Myri while Iella worked in her office. About an hour and a half after Syal left, the comm buzzed. I didn't think anything of it. Iella answered it. Two minutes later, I was in trouble. She stormed into the living room saying we had to pick up Syal.
"Whatever it is - I didn't do it!" I insisted. As much as I wanted to sabotage the date, I didn't.
Iella didn't believe me. She told me that Tarq was under arrest for stealing that speeder. Someone called it in missing. Syal was stuck at the impound garage nearby. Tarq's father was on his way to sort it out and prove that the speeder wasn't stolen. Despite my insistence that I was innocent, Iella made me stay home with Myri. She didn't want me making the situation worse, as if I would do that.
About ten minutes after Iella left, my personal comm pinged. A text message appeared on the screen stating:
Yub yub, Commander.
-Lt. Kettch.
I knew I liked those guys for a reason.