"I was sitting in that truck and he had his music blaring. It was the first time I ever had a problem with his music. The reason? I knew he was trying to avoid talking to me; avoiding having to explain to me why he was taking me to a foster home when he was 18 and old enough to be my guardian. We pulled up to the house. It was broken down, worn out. I grimaced just at the look of it. Shingles were falling off the roof, it looked as if no had bothered to paint it in years, and the driveway was cracked so badly there might as well have been no driveway at all.
He turned the music down as I grabbed my bag. 'Bye.' He said. I just slammed the door; too hurt to reply. As that old, green pick up backed down the driveway I said a silent 'I hate you.' The worst part? I meant it. After that I walked into that house; into my future. I didn't eat anymore. I didn't have the appetite. I was a ghost in shell. I moved to 3 different foster homes in one year. I was told that the last one would be my final one. There were other kids, younger ones. I looked out for them. I took it upon myself to be that older sibling they never would get to have.
I didn't see Spencer until a year after the day he dropped me off. He never came by or sent any letters, and I never cared to send any to him. I guess you could say I believed he had completely forgotten about me. It was Christmas time and I was 17, living at my final foster home; even more shabby then the last two. I was tying a bow in one of the other kids hair when I heard the door bell ring. Alice, our foster mom, was busy and asked me to answer. I opened the door and there was my dear old brother in the flesh. He was 19 now but nothing about him had changed.
'Carly?' He said as if he was looking at a ghost. I didn't blame him. He might not have changed but I had. I had lost weight from not eating. I looked older; I felt older, but the little girl inside of me was so excited, silly enough to believe that her brother had changed his mind and was coming back for her. I was 17. I should've known better.
'Well, um, hey, I can't stay long, but I just wanted to give you your Christmas present.' He motioned me to follow him. We went outside and sitting there in the driveway was the truck he had dropped me off in only a year ago; it felt like ages. Sitting in the driver's seat was my brother's girlfriend of three years. After I saw her I saw the shiny new Volvo right behind the truck in the driveway.
'You're going to be 18 soon and I'm sure you are going to want to get out of here so I'm giving you my truck!' He said with a hopeful smile on his face. I know I should've been happy that I was getting that truck, but the little girl inside of me was crushed. It was liked getting abandoned all over again.
'You mean you're leaving me here?' His hopeful expression changed to that of a bewildered one. He expected me to be happy, excited even, I could see the shock in his eyes. I was just doing my best to fight back my tears.
'You didn't think I was coming to get you, did you?' My heart shattered into a million little pieces, and I couldn't breathe. It was like that first day only worse, because now I knew he didn't want me. That I meant nothing to him. 'Look, Carly, we talked about this…'
'We never talked Spencer! We got home from that blasted funeral and you told me to pack my bags! I had just lost my mom and next thing I know I'm losing my brother! The ONE person I had left in my life! Gone! I thought was going to be able to cope with mom's death as long as I had my brother. That's all I wanted, but no, you sent me away to live with strangers! Do you even know what I have gone through this past year? I'm not that same girl you dropped off. So, please, just leave.'
'Carly…' He asked, unsure of what to say.
'Leave! I said LEAVE! I DON'T WANT YOU HERE! I DON'T WANT A BROTHER ANYMORE!' I threw a rock at his head, but missed. I turned and ran back inside the pathetic excuse for a house. I didn't even bother to watch him drive away this time. You can imagine my surprise when I walked outside the next day and saw the truck sitting there.
He came by a few more times after that, but I refused to see him; refused to get my hopes up again. Eventually he just stopped coming all together; giving up on me once more. A few more months passed by and then I turned 18. Alice made a big fuss over it. She made me a birthday cake, and all the kids gave me presents. I have to admit it was kind of sad leaving that day, but there were better things for me out there; better than them or my brother. I slung my duffel bag into the back of that truck, and cranked the old beat up, and headed off to the west coast."
"Sounds like you had quite the experience with your brother." My therapist Tracey said. "Are you sure you want to see your brother?"
I smiled. I knew I was sure. "Yes." I stated firmly. Tracey smiled then paged someone to let him in. I gasped when I saw him. He was 25 now and had definitely changed. I stood up and we hugged. "I'm sorry for throwing a rock at your head." I said tears staining my cheeks.
"I'm sorry for leaving you." He said with matching tears in his eyes, and I knew right then, that maybe, just maybe, this life did have some hope in it.
authors note: yall let me know what you think and if you have any other ideas for stories i can do! (: review pleaseeee! (: