Title: I Hate You!
Author: Jedikma
Characters: Anakin Skywalker, Padme, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Sabe, Bail Organa, Siri Tachi
Timeframe: AU post AotC
Genre: Humor/Romance
Summary: Anakin tries to play matchmaker, or lifting the ban on the code regarding attachments results in some rather un-Jedi like behavior. (This is AU)
Disclaimer: The usual disclaimers apply
I HateYou!
Young Anakin Skywalker, the Chosen One of prophecy, had proven his worth and had brought balance to the Force. His unprecedented defeat of the Sith Lord had gained him the gratitude of the Jedi, the Senate and the galaxy as a whole. As the darkness receded and light once again dawned, changes came. The Jedi Order questioned much of its old ways and began to make revisions.
One of those revisions was the code regarding attachment. It naturally came into question when Anakin announced his intentions to marry the lovely Senator from Naboo, Padme Amidala, with or without the Council's permission. It wouldn't look very good for the Council to expel Anakin from the Order after he had just saved them from almost certain annihilation and so they acquiesced and allowed Anakin the marriage.
That only opened the doors for other Knights to make similar requests and so the code on attachment was remanded and Knights were eligible to date and seek a life mate.
Anakin made Padme his wife and discovered a sweet bliss in having a spouse. His contentment only encouraged him to seek partners for his friends and he began to play matchmaker. Even before his own wedding reception had waned, he found a potential mate for his own former Master, Obi-Wan Kenobi, and for Padme's long time friend Bail Organa. In fact, the introductions of that evening progressed into a series of steady dates for both the matches Anakin had made and, Anakin, endlessly pleased with himself decided it was time to have a dinner gathering with his friends.
"Anakin, I do believe that everything is ready for the evening and now all we have to do is wait for our guests to arrive." Padme smiled as she once more examined the dining table, which was set for six.
"Stop worrying, my love," Anakin said as he came up from behind her and put his arms around her. "Everything will be perfect and, if all goes well, I wouldn't be surprised if we didn't end up with invitations to two more weddings."
"Do you think it is that serious for both couples?" Padme asked.
"I think it will be an evening of surprises and two couples will go home very happy." He gave her a little peck on the cheek. He then paused and sensed something. "Punctual, as always, Obi-Wan is here."
The front bell had not even chimed, but Anakin had sensed his former Master's presence through the Force and he was quick to open the door. "Obi-Wan. Sabe. Come in! It is so wonderful you could join us for our first dinner party in our new home."
"Good of you to invite us, Anakin." Obi-Wan replied and he handed him a bottle of wine.
Sabe pushed passed the two men and immediately approached Padme and embraced her. "Marriage must agree with you, Padme. You look so radiant."
Padme blushed and the two women giggled.
"I must say that you look quite well and happy, yourself, Sabe. Is there something you wish to share?"
Sabe glanced back at the two men and then conspiratorially pulled Padme to the opposite side of the room. As always the two women looked like sisters with the same dark hair coloring and amber colored eyes. They were both dressed in full gowns of rich magenta.
Anakin turned again to Obi-Wan and was about to offer him a drink when the bell chime rang. He turned to the door instead and opened it. There stood Bail Organa with his date Jedi Knight Siri Tachi.
"Bail, Siri. Now the party can begin!" Anakin said with a sweep of his hand.
Bail handed him a bottle. "Here you are, my friend. I can assure you it is the finest wine that Alderaan has to offer."
"Hello Aankin. Obi-Wan," Siri said as she removed her cape and handed it to Anakin. Underneath she wore a simple chemise of sapphire blue that fell to her knees.
Anakin hung up Siri's cloak and then followed Bail into the center of the room where he proceeded to pour drinks for his guests. Obi-Wan stepped close to Siri and spoke in a low tone. "Still involved with the stuffed shirt, I see."
Siri shot her fellow Knight an irritated glance. "Obi-wan, this evening will pass much more pleasantly if you hang your jealousies in the closet along with my cloak."
Obi-Wan scoffed at her remark. "I am hardly jealous of a man who has to spend the better part of his day sifting through red tape and kissing the behinds of his fellow politicians."
Siri rolled her eyes at him. "Still, Bail Organa has something you don't have."
"If you are speaking of yourself, Siri, he can have you. It obviously hasn't sunk in with him yet that you have the most annoying way of opening your mouth at the wrong time and place."
"If you are going to spend this evening being mean, I refuse to talk to you. Besides, the date you're with leaves plenty to be desired. Not to mention she is far too young for you."
Obi-Wan gave a mock look of hurt. "Picking on a lowly handmaiden? Now who is jealous?"
"Lowly? She pretends to be helpless just to get the attention of her heroic Knight." Siri put up her hands in mock distress. "Oh! Obi-Wan, my Knight, my love! Help me! Save me!"
Obi-Wan laughed. "Might I remind you that Sabe has awards in the art of self-defense. She doesn't need me to save her from anything."
Siri's eyes began to burn brightly with irritation. "That may be so, but the reason she is with you is so she can brag that she is dating a Jedi Knight. When she discovers that you don't make enough credits to keep her in her fine gowns, she'll find someone who can."
Obi-Wan's own resolve was beginning to wear thin under Siri's tart remarks. "Now who is being mean? I suspect the good Senator's interest in you is to have a trophy wife and since you could double as his bodyguard, as well, he could fire half his staff. That would be smart business sense."
Siri was about to launch into Obi-Wan all over again when Anakin interrupted. He gave them both a cautious nod and through gritted teeth he said, "You two just can't stop talking missions, can you? I think it would be well to put work on a shelf for this evening and enjoy ourselves."
Realizing that they had nearly started a scene, they smiled.
"Anakin! How right you are! It is so difficult for Master Tachi and me to be in the same room together and not get into some silly confrontation." Obi-Wan took the glass of wine that Anakin had brought to him and took a gulp. "My apologies." He bowed to Anakin and Padme who had come from behind.
"It is always difficult to leave work behind, but perhaps a good dinner will be a nice distraction. Shall we adjourn to the dining room?" Padme offered as she turned to escort everyone to the next room.
Siri shot Obi-wan a glance that indicated he had been saved this time, but the next time he wouldn't be so lucky.
Despite the cordiality of the hosts, dinner was actually a little tense. The odd mix of couples in the room seemed to add to the discomfort. The Jedi sought to divert discussions away from politics and the politicians didn't care to hear about the trivialities facing the Jedi in the Temple. Padme glanced often at Anakin, who would return her looks with hesitant reassurances.
The evening moved on, dinner ended and the party once again moved to the main living area. As the others continued their conversations, Siri excused herself and disappeared down a long hallway to the refresher. When she emerged she found Obi-wan standing there waiting.
They just looked at each other at first and then Obi-Wan spoke. "I think you look quite nice in your dress this evening."
Siri looked at him, not knowing if he was actually trying to be nice or whether he was just setting her up for another verbal sparring match.
"I really mean it, Siri. I sensed that you felt like you weren't dressed appropriately for the evening, but you are doing quite well," Obi-Wan said sincerely.
"You know what I hate, Obi-Wan? I hate that you always know what I'm feeling."
Obi-Wan gave her a knowing grin that always grated on her nerves. She shook her blonde head and was about to say something more when the sound of voices caught their attention. Just off the end of the hallway was a secluded balcony and it was clear that there were two people occupying it.
"Oh, Bail, I just haven't been able to yet."
"I understand, Sabe, but we can't go on with this charade forever."
Siri gave a questioning look of shock to Obi-Wan, who in turn put a finger to his lips and motioned for her to follow him. They crept closer to the balcony and saw Bail Organa holding Sabe in his arms.
"What about you, Bail? You haven't yet set Master Tachi free."
"I know, Sabe, but when it comes to that woman, it calls for tact. I don't want to lose anything vital, after all."
Siri's eyes shot daggers as she caught a smug smile spreading across Obi-wan's face.
"Well, at least she isn't a total bore." Sabe sighed. "I don't think I can go through the tedious details of one more mission."
Now it was Siri's turn to give a smug smile to Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan just narrowed his eyes at her.
"Do you realize the we are both going to be dumped?" Obi-Wan hissed. "You by a pompous politician and me by a money grubbing lowly handmaiden?"
"Oh, no! No one dumps Siri Tachi! I am the dumper, never the dumpee!"
"Except in our case." Obi-Wan countered.
"There was a code back then and that was a mutual thing-"
"Not the way I recall it."
"Ooh! You are so impossible Kenobi!"
"I have an idea, are you game?"
"Why should I get in bed with you, of all people?"
"Interesting choice of words." A grin spread from ear to ear on Obi-Wan's face and Siri wanted to impale him then and there with her lightsaber.
"For once, Siri, just follow my lead and stop fighting me!"
Before Siri could say anything further, Obi-wan dragged her out into the open end of the hallway and pulled her into his arms. He then captured her lips in his own and kissed her. A small vocalization of protest escaped Siri's mouth, but was quickly subdued and turned into a soft groan. Siri's arms snaked hesitantly around Obi-Wan's neck. The two Jedi were found in this position when Sabe and Bail stepped in from the balcony.
A sound of disgust escaped Sabe. "Well, I never!"
Bail looked at her in surprise. "Come on, Sabe. This saves us a lot of problems."
"Oh no! No one dumps me! I dump them!" Sabe said in protest.
Bail just rolled his eyes and grabbed her arm, dragging her out into the main living area. The couple gave their excuses to their hosts and left.
Obi-Wan and Siri stayed in the hallway, kissing.
"You know what I hate?" Obi-Wan muttered as his lips parted from hers. "I hate how men's heads turn every time you enter a room, especially mine."
As Obi-Wan planted small kisses across Siri's cheek, she responded. "Well I hate how women drool all over you and follow you like lost pets."
His lips continued their path along her jaw line. "I hate that you can never keep from sharing your opinion."
Siri released a little groan. "I hate that you are always right."
"I hate that your lips are so soft and that you feel so nice in my arms." Obi-Wan worked his kisses down the side of her neck to her throat.
"I hate the way your arms feel around me and the way your beard tickles when you kiss me." She muttered between quickened breaths.
Obi-Wan sighed and brought his face up to look in her deep blue eyes. "You want to know what I really hate? Pesky ex-Padawans who try to make me feel I need to be in a relationship when I really don't want to be."
Siri let out a quiet laugh as she gently messaged the back of his neck with one hand. "Now we are finally in agreement. I don't want to be matched up with any more stuffy Senators-"
"Or dippy handmaidens," Obi-Wan added.
"I have an idea, Siri. Why don't we just tell them we are involved with each other and maybe they will just leave us alone?"
"But whatever will we do on a Saturday night, Obi-Wan?" Siri said sarcastically.
A mischievous smile spread across Obi-Wan's face as he pecked her lips with his. "You could always come over to my quarters and play a game of sabaac."
"Just sabaac, nothing else?"
Obi-Wan nuzzled his face next to hers. "If you want to get daring we could make it strip sabaac."
Siri gave him flirtatious laugh and he kissed her again.
"Obi-Wan?" Anakin inquired as he and Padme found them in the hallway, still wrapped in each other's arms.
"Not now, Anakin. I'm busy," Obi-Wan answered in automatic annoyance.
Padme cleared her throat and finally caught the attention of the two Masters. Reluctantly they disengaged themselves and began to smooth out their clothing.
"It's been an interesting party, Anakin. Really, but we must go." Obi-Wan smiled.
"A joy. Really." Siri added.
Then Obi-Wan grabbed Siri by the hand and fled with her out the front door.
Anakin turned to Padme with a nervous grin on his face. "I told you, did I not, that it would be an evening of surprises and that two couples would go home happy?"
Padme gave her spouse a sharp look of irritation. "That was the most uncomfortable evening and dinner party of my life! Don't ever, ever, again consider playing matchmaker, Anakin Skywalker!"
fin