What I am to you is not real, what I am to you, you do not need.
She hadn't seen him for two years. Two, heartbreakingly long years. Then he goes and waltzes back into her life, as if it was what she had always wanted.
Which it was.
She longed for his company, someone she could joke with and it didn't matter if she was an idiot, because he already knew she was. He was someone she could be herself with, and she could tell him her problems without him judging her. Despite the carefree joker he was, he would be there, even if she just needed someone to pour out to and not advice. He wouldn't rebuke her; he wouldn't roll his eyes and say 'Rikku… use your head'. He'd just listen.
What I am to you is not what you mean to me
Then she saw him. And they teased and joked. It was as if nothing had changed… but it had. His smile was fake and rehearsed, like that of someone who'd been with many women, and knew exactly how to melt their hearts. That casual wink… it didn't fool her, even if it did Yuna. His eyes… in those emerald swirls she could see him sizing her up. She could see an earnest glint in his eyes, almost searching for a challenge. There was a sort of hunger in them; could you call it love? When they were growing up, she longed for him to look at her like that… like she was a girl. She had tried everything to get his attention, constantly questioning; should I dress differently? Should I tell him? He only thinks of me as that misfit who doesn't fit in with the girls…
But now that he finally saw her as a woman… it sickened her. She loved him, but not the way he loved her. She had always thought of him as her best friend and future love. But she could tell that all he saw was a hot girl ready to be swept off her feet. Other girls would have died to be in her position, to have him look and touch them like that. But she didn't want all the silly, flirty fun he offered. She was greedy. She wanted him all.
You give me miles and miles of mountains and I'll ask for the sea…
"Rikku…"
She stared at the hurt, confused look in his eyes and felt tears fill her own. But she turned away; turned away from him and the monstrous, rocky outcrops of Djose and gazed at the glittering blue ocean and left. Because she was greedy. She wanted him all.
Finally got round to writing/publishing something! Thanks Miesie-chan for your review, if I get the chance and some inspiration, maybe I'll write some more... actually, you've got me thinking now!