Day 1: Very boring now that master is giant eyeball...Last Alliance not as wimpy as we thought. Am redecorating Minas Morgul to suit my anti-Gondorian needs. Am very excited, called in a few people and should be able to get cable.
Day 2: The renovating guys came in and suggested for me to convert the downstairs into a home theater, very promising. However, still boring here, we've went through all of our board games and the orcs keep on breaking the coffee machine. Am considering kicking them out.
Day 3: Went to see Sauron if he might want to donate some money to the renovating of Minas Morgul, other Nazguls refuse to pitch in. Saw him spying on little short man.
Day 4: Master sent us to hunt down little fellow, he says that he has some type of ring. Don't see the importance myself but will go. I have to stay in his good books if I want to get around to paying those guys.
Day 8: Very long ride from Mordor to Shire. Horse very tired, his eyes are all bloodshot. Luckily I no longer have a human face, I'd be terrified to see what I'd look like if I was normal.
Day 10: Have caught up to little men, so cute, I can see why Sauron wants them.
Day 11: Got a message from Sauron, he won't be paying us overtime for the hobbit job, says that the renovation bills will put us back a few thousand years.
Day 15: Went to Bree and knocked down a few walls, told them that I was so sorry, however they just ran away screaming. Hobbits teamed up with a man. I would've got them if he washed his hair, the fumes coming off his head nearly killed me, however as I am not alive I can't die. Oh cruel existence...
Day 18: Stabbed hobbit...finally...
Day 20: Hobbit survived, not good, Sauron very upset.