Passing Afternoon

Part 1: Kate's Blood

A/N: I've never written anything in depth about Kate's death, and I feel like I owe it to her memory to churn something out about the events of Twilight and Kill Ari. After all, she was (and is) my favorite character. So, I present this fic. There will be four chapters, one a day for four days.

Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS, and I don't own the various lyrics I took from Passing Afternoon by Iron and Wine.

"There are times that walk from you, like a passing afternoon. Summer warmed the open window of her honeymoon, and she chose a yard to burn, but the ground remembers her."

One second, he's listening to Kate talk, relieved that she has a bullet proof vest on, and the next he hears a resounding bang, and then feels a spray of hot liquid on his face. Everything seems to be in slow motion as Kate falls to the ground, and he can see the light fly from her eyes, see her soul leave her body... he sees her die.

But, that can't be right... Kate was just talking... Kate can't be dead. But yet, there she is on the ground, a pool of blood slowly spreading from the back of her head, her eyes sightless and staring at nothing at all. His mouth hangs open slightly as he puts a hand to his face. He pulls it back, and the warm liquid is blood... Kate's blood.

He hears Gibbs whisper Ari's name as he points his SIG at the rooftop of the nearby building. He looks back down at Kate's body. "But..." he trails off, not knowing what he's trying to contradict. He here's footsteps and gunshots as Gibbs races along the rooftop, firing at Ari even though there's not a chance in hell he can hit him at this distance.

He kneels down on his hands and knees next to Kate, and even though he can see it with his eyes, feel the last blood that pumped through her body on his face and hands, he doesn't quite get it. He can't comprehend it... he slides two fingers to her pulse point needlessly, and he hopes for something. Anything. He waits like that for a long time, but there's nothing. Her skin is cold, unmoving. She is a porcelain replica of Caitlin Todd put on display for all to see, perfect with the glaring exception of the bloody red dot on her forehead.

"Kate..." he says her name. His voice doesn't sound anguished, more confused. "Kate." he repeats, and he thinks a part of him is trying to call her back from the dead. "No..." There's that anguish he was expecting, the crack in his voice, the sound of someone who's lost and doesn't even know how to take their next breath.

He hears footsteps nearing him and feels a hand on his shoulder. He doesn't react to it, doesn't respond... he continues to stare at Kate, making direct eye contact with the brown orbs that will never meet his own again. There is no spark, no shine, nothing. There is only emptiness and a frail reminder that life is fleeting. There one minute and gone the next.

"No." he says resolutely, shaking his head. "No." he has always been the kind of man that can look at the reality in front of him and refuse to accept it, and this is something he cannot... will not accept. Caitlin Todd is not dead.

"DiNozzo." Gibbs calls his name, but he's too numb to respond, he's so busy trying to think of a way that this could be all wrong, that this is a mistake, that the terrible proof right in front of him isn't a fact. He can't come up with anything.

Gibbs switches positions, crouching in front of him. He feels the older agent's hand on the side of his face that isn't soaked in blood. Kate's blood. "Tony, look at me."

He barely lifts his head, and he meets Gibbs' bright blue eyes, and he feels hot tears burning in his own, threatening to spill over.

"Boss." Tony whispers before his eyes fall to Kate once more. "She's..."

"I know." Gibbs purses his lips, pointedly not looking at Kate.

McGee arrived on the roof at that moment, gasping for breath and dripping with sweat, and looking close to a panic attack if his white knuckled grip on his weapon is any indication.

"Are you guys okay? I heard gunshots -" he stops dead in his tracks when he sees his and Gibbs' expressions, and the wires slowly connect in his mind to who they are crouching over...

"McGee, call Ducky." Gibbs tells him, and McGee was still far enough to only see Kate as an indistinct lump, so he doesn't actually see the body. He turns away, licking his lips like he always does when he is nervous and blinking his eyes rapidly as he heads back down the fire escape.

Tony is fairly sure he hears retching echoing in the distance.

The autopsy van soon arrives and takes her body away, Ducky and Palmer both flinching visibly at the sight of Kate's body. "Oh Caitlin..." is all Ducky says, and he remains unusually quiet as her body is loaded into the van.

Tony, still covered in blood, sits down in the backseat of their cruiser, allowing McGee to ride shotgun next to Gibbs. He stares at his hands the entire time. He says nothing during the ride back to the Naval Yard. McGee looks at Gibbs, eyes shining, and his green eyes ask a silent question.

"Ari." is Gibbs' grunted response, and anything McGee needs to know is answered. He sees the probationary agent clench his fists, and he sees that McGee is in the middle ground between how Gibbs feels and how Tony does. Tony feels distant and empty, and Gibbs is filled with murderous rage. McGee is the median between them.

They arrive at NCIS, and when they step into the elevator, the three of them realize that someone will have to inform Abby. McGee looks sick to his stomach at the prospect, and Tony has not formed a coherent thought since the bullet pierced Kate's skull. Gibbs says he will do it, then glances at Tony.

"DiNozzo... shower. Change." Gibbs instructs, as his gaze goes from Tony's face, to his hands, to the knees of his pants, which are soaked through with blood from where he kneeled next to Kate's body. Tony nods, and when McGee gets off at the bullpen, Gibbs follows to drop off his bag before heading down to speak with Abby. Tony remains in the elevator as it heads down to the ground floor. He steps out when it dings once more, and he makes his way to the locker rooms and the showers. It isn't until he takes his shoes off that he realizes the bottoms of his shoes are covered in blood. If someone wanted to follow him, all they would have to do is follow the bloody foot prints he left behind.

Kate's blood.

He strips off his clothes and throws them in the trash, along with his shoes, even his socks - he never wants to look at any of them again. Ever. He has backup clothes in his bag that he'll wear when he's done getting cleaned up.

The thrum of the hot water beating down on him offers him a stunning amount of clarity, and he looks up into the shower head. Kate is dead. It finally sinks in, and he finds his head dropping so much that his chin touches his chest. His eyes burn, and he can't tell if tears are flowing or not through the wash of searing water. He wants to feel cleansed, to get the feeling of being soaked in his partner's blood off of him, but he can't. No matter what he can do to his body, his soul will never be scrubbed clean.

He looks down at his feet, and sees blood swirling with the water. Kate's blood.

A/N: Reviews make the world go 'round!