Welcome everybody! This is an exciting moment for me! I used to post stories on here, years ago, and have ended up taking a long break. I had decided about two months ago that I was going to start writing again, and I had written a chapter for another story, but at some point, I sat down and began writing at random, and this is what came of it! This story is unexpected, but already dear to my heart, and I hope that you all will love it as much as I do!
I would quickly like to thank my beta reader BeautifulUnseen! She is a phenomenal writer herself, and if you haven't already you should definitely check out her newly finished story Roses Dipped In Gold, as well as a new story that she has recently posted, I promise you will not be disappointed!
Once again, I hope you all enjoy the story, and I cannot wait to hear what you all think of it!
Always,
B

…

Letting his body fall into sync with the beat, the boy's eyes wandered around the packed club, watching the groups of people on the dance floor sway to the music. He closed his eyes, tilted his head backwards, and lost himself in the song. A warmth was beginning to come over him both because of the music and because of the shot he had taken just moments before.

If anybody had told him when he graduated high school that two years later, his life would become what it is today, he would have laughed in their face and assured them that he would never allow it to be so hectic. After graduating, he had made his way to New York with his best friend, just as they had always planned. Both had been accepted into NYADA and both were eager to start their paths toward their Broadway careers. However, everything had not gone as planned. His best friend's dreams became a reality quicker than predicted, and she was now in her final week of the second run of Funny Girl on Broadway.

At first, he had been a little jealous that his dreams weren't becoming reality as quickly as hers were, and he had definitely spent nights wishing that he was the one starring on Broadway. He decided that instead of spending his time sulking, he would try to find something to occupy his spare time. Fashion was something he had always loved, and something that he had wanted to spend time doing, so he began his hunt for an internship within the fashion industry. The jealousy he had felt towards his best friend had faded out when he applied, and was offered an internship at Vogue. He was completely content with the fact that his internship with Isabelle Wright was unpaid, however, one day he had forgotten to pack his sketchbook filled with different cover spread ideas, and Isabelle had stumbled upon it, loving everything about it. She had taken it up to the chief editor of Vogue (who loved it even more), which led to Kurt Hummel becoming the assistant chief editor of Vogue, and dropping out of NYADA to focus on his passion for the fashion industry.

It had been all fun and games when he started; he was doing one of the things that he was most passionate about, and he had come in full force with many fresh ideas that everybody loved. After a while, though, everything seemed to die down, and he slowly started losing interest in being at the top. It came with so much stress that he could hardly handle it. Deadlines that hardly gave him any time to think, meetings where he was yelled at for bringing up certain ideas, and handling the press had all become unbelievably suffocating. He had continued to try his best to keep up as he didn't want to lose his job, but could say with 100% certainty that he no longer loved it. He instead longed for the days when he had spent hours upon hours with only a piano and his voice, loving the way he could lose himself while singing his heart out.

After becoming assistant editor, his anxiety had grown, and the panic attacks had become more and more frequent. In high school, he had been able to manage his anxiety by making sure that his schedule was not too overwhelming, and that he had time to breathe in between spurts of craziness, but it was proving to be an impossible task now. There was no breathing room at the top. There were no breaks, or time for himself. Everything was dependent upon him, and he had to work like hell to make sure it all went right.

Panic attacks seemed to be a daily thing for him now, and when they hit, he would have to excuse himself from meetings, or close the blinds in his office so that he could be alone until they passed. Usually it started with a tightening in his chest, and soon enough he would be gasping for air, trying to relieve his suffocating lungs. He would end up sitting on the ground, pulling his legs into his chest as he gently rocked back and forth to try and soothe himself. Sometimes the attacks made him lightheaded, and occasionally he would completely lose consciousness for a few moments. Other times it was like he was no longer able to see anything, his vision going black. If he were to try and explain an attack to someone, he would say that it was like somebody was holding him under water and he was unable to come to the surface to breathe.

This is where the club came in. Although getting drunk may not have been the best of ideas, it helped erase the stress of the day, and the mere fact that he could spend the entire night surrounded by music helped him more than he could have imagined. As soon as he walked through the doors of the club, he completely let go of anything and everything that troubled him, and of course, with the help of some alcohol in his system, he no longer had a care in the world. His friends had told him that he needed some proper help, and that what he was doing wasn't helping him in the slightest, but he usually brushed them off with a roll of his eyes, making comments about how the anxiety wasn't even that bad.

He let out a breathy sigh as he picked his hands up and rested them on top of his head, letting his body completely take over, a smirk spreading across his lips as he felt a hand slip around his waist and a body press against his back. Dropping his arms, he glanced over his shoulder. A very attractive blonde swayed his hips behind him with a suggestive smile on his face. Throwing the boy a wink, he moved his hands so that they were wrapped around his neck before beginning to move his hips a bit more than he had been, dropping his head back against the stranger's shoulder.

To say that he was a player was pushing it, as hardly any of his dance partners came home with him. He had dated a few guys, but nothing had come out of those short relationships, and he saw no point in one night stands as they just weren't a part of who he was. All in all, he had no interest in pursuing anything, casual or not, but there was no harm in a little fun at the club, right? Just to help relax and let the anxiety go, of course.

He let out a groan as he felt the familiar buzzing in his pocket, knowing that it was most likely a call that could not go ignored. He quickly dropped his hands from where they were resting around the boy's neck, mumbling a 'sorry' before weaving through the sweaty bodies that covered the dance floor and heading to the exit so that he could take the call. The cool air hit him as he emerged through the door and into the dark fall night. The boy reached into his pocket, answering his phone before he could even read the name that flashed across his screen.

"Kurt Hummel," he answered professionally. He was happy that this call had come in before he'd had the chance to take any more shots.

"So, you are alive then," the voice came through the phone, causing the boy to shiver at the anger laced within it.

"Y-yes." He stuttered, confusion clear in his voice. "I mean…why wouldn't I be alive? I believe I texted you a few hours ago." The confusion and fear whirled within him.

"Well I wasn't sure, considering there was an empty seat in the row that I personally booked for a few of my close friends for my finalnight of Funny Girl." The anger grew with every word, the girl becoming louder as she finished the sentence.

"Shit," he breathed, eyes snapping shut as he brought a hand up to run through his hair. "Rachel, I-" he began, but was immediately cut off.

"Rachel I'm sorry I forgot, like I always do with these things, and I will most definitely make it up to you," she imitated his voice. "Save it, Kurt. You knew how important it was for you to be there tonight!" The anger in her voice beginning to subside, instead being replaced with disappointment.

"I know," he said in barely more than a whisper. "God, I can't believe I forgot," he added, talking more to himself than to the girl who was waiting for more. "Our meeting for the December issue went so late, and I didn't even think to check my calendar when I left, I just wanted to get out." He knew that making up an excuse would not help him. When there was no response, he sighed and bit his lip for a second before speaking again. "Rachel, I know at this moment I am the world's shittiest best friend, but is there anything - and I mean anything - that I can do to at least make up for a fraction of this?" he asked, hoping that somehow, he could make this better.

"Well I'm pissed as hell, Hummel, but I will be much less pissed if you got your ass over to this after party to at least celebrate with me," she said, the slightest bit of happiness fluttering into her tone.

"Absolutely. I will be there!" he said quickly before beginning the walk to where he had parked his car. "Text me the address?" A smile found its way across his lips when he heard her sigh a little in happiness. He was in the clear for tonight.

"Already done, sweetie," she answered.

"Do I detect a smile in your tone, Ms. Berry?" he teased as he opened the door to his charcoal Audi, before climbing in.

"No!" Rachel quickly snapped before a giggle escaped through the phone. "Maybe. Just get over here Kurt, I can't party without my best friend at my side, and I really want to party," she told him with another giggle. "Hey Kurt?" she asked, her tone turning serious.

"Yes Rach?" A frown appeared on his face.

"Was everything okay today? For you, I mean?" she asked, causing the boy to sigh lightly. He knew exactly what she was asking. Rachel was the one who knew the most about his attacks and she was constantly checking on him to make sure he was okay. Most of the time he would tell her that he was fine and that she didn't need to worry so much, as he didn't want to bother her with the reality that everything seemed to be getting worse. "Kurt?" she asked again when he still hadn't given her an answer.

"Sorry, yes everything was fine," he told her, the usual lie rolling off his tongue effortlessly. "Don't you worry your pretty little head about it." She giggled and told him that she'd see him when he got there before hanging up. He took a deep breath, trying to find a way out of his own head before turning on the radio and making his way to the party.

…

As soon as Kurt pushed through the door there was a brunette flinging her body towards him, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Finally!" Rachel shouted over the music. "You took forever getting here!" she added as she pulled away. She was clearly already a few drinks in, as she was a little wobbly, which made the boy chuckle.

"I'm here, I'm here so you can relax now." He laughed as she nodded vigorously. "How was the performance?" he asked, still feeling overly guilty that he had missed it.

"It was incredible Kurt!" she beamed. "The audience was ten times bigger, and everything seemed to be so much better. I knocked the house down with 'Who Are You,' as usual!" she added excitedly. "I wish you had been there, but you're here now, so it's all okay!" Once again, a huge smile spread across her lips.

"Well I am so proud of you Rachel, honestly." He told her sincerely before pressing a kiss to the girl's cheek. "Promise I won't miss anything like that again. Now go, enjoy the party, I'm going to grab a drink." He watched as she nodded and headed back towards the makeshift dance floor.

Kurt hadn't ever been to this place before; it was a nice penthouse located in the Upper East Side. The furniture had been pushed against the walls to allow more room for the dance floor, but even if it hadn't, there would have been tons of room for dancing. Separated from the living room by giant glass doors, there was what looked like a spacious patio. It was a beautiful place, and perfect for Rachel's celebration.

Making his way through the place, Kurt found himself wandering into the kitchen, which, like the rest of the house, was spacious. There was an island in the center that held more bottles of alcohol than he could count. Grabbing one that had a pink tinge to it, he poured himself a cup before making his way towards the mass of bodies.

"Kurt Hummel!" A familiar voice burst through the noise. "Boy, it's been too long." Kurt spun around to face the girl who was making her way towards him.

"Don't I know it," he joked, opening his arms and enveloping the girl. "Mercedes, I didn't know you were coming to town for this." They pulled back, the boy grinning at the girl.

"I wouldn't ever miss it, unlike some others," she shot a pointed glare at him.

"I know, I'm the world's worst friend, I know." He sighed, looking down at the floor. "I didn't mean to," he added softly.

The girl nodded giving him a sympathetic smile. "I know, Rach filled me in already. You really need a break, Kurt. You're wearing yourself out," she scolded.

He nodded knowingly. "I mean, I try to take a break in the evening after work instead of heading home and continuing to do work." He shrugged, a frown appearing on his face when Mercedes gave him a look and shook her head. "What?" he asked, confused.

"That's not a break, Kurt. Clubbing and getting wasted is not helping you in any way," she huffed, rolling her eyes. "You need to get out of that habit before you drink yourself to death."

"It's just so stress relieving," he shrugged.

"No Kurt, I'm serious." She shook her head. "Find something else. Find something that you can fall in love with that is stress relieving. Look, I know that I'm not the first one to give you this speech, but we all just want what's best for you, and drinking yourself into a stress-free state isn't it," she concluded before pulling him into a hug. "We just want you to be okay." She let him go. "Now go, have fun and we'll have to find a time to get together before I leave."

"Deal," Kurt nodded, biting his lip slightly. "Cedes?" he said as she began to turn away, causing the girl to look back at him. "Thank you." He gave her a small smile and watched as she nodded before making her way back to the dance floor where Sam was trying out some new dance moves.

…

Kurt made his way out of one of the open doors to the patio not long after. He had stopped multiple times to catch up with some of the glee kids before deciding that he needed some fresh air. He took a deep breath and looked around the patio, which was just as busy as the inside of the house. As he glanced around, he spotted a hot tub that had more people in it than it should, and a railing across from him on the other side of what was supposed to be another makeshift dance floor. Weaving through the groups of dancing people, he made his way to the railing, his breath catching at the view it overlooked. The lights of New York were beautiful at night, and no matter how long he had lived there, he could never get tired of looking at them. Taking a deep breath, he closed his eyes for a second, reveling in the peace of the moment. It wasn't until something brushed against his arm and a soft 'Sorry' was mumbled that his eyes opened. Sighing, he brought his cup up to his lips as he turned to look at whatever had brought him out of his moment and his eyes landed on the person standing next to him.

Hazel met blue, causing his heart to stutter and his breath to hitch as he slowly brought the cup down from his face. The eyes that were staring back at him were so incredibly intense, with small golden streaks hidden behind the hazel. They were like nothing Kurt had ever seen before. He opened his mouth to say something so that he would look a little less stupid, but nothing came out. To his relief, however, a familiar voice popped into the silence.

"Kurt! I see you've met Blaine!" The voice sounded excited.

"Hey Sam," Kurt said, finally turning his eyes away from the gorgeous man in front of him to look at the blonde who had just arrived. "And kind of, I guess," he added before looking back at the brunette and holding out his hand. "I'm Kurt." A smile grazed his lips.

"Blaine, as this one already let you know," Blaine chuckled, nodding at Sam before taking hold of Kurt's hand, causing his breath to hitch once again at the contact.

Kurt tried to bring himself back. "That he did. It's nice to meet you." Blaine nodded in agreement, shooting him a wink. God, keep it together, Hummel! He chastised himself inwardly, trying to stay cool.

"Blaine and I met at the show choir competition, actually," Sam finally pitched in. "He was kind of the competition, but he's a great friend so I let it slide." Sam chuckled. "He was the coach of the Dalton Warblers," he explained, looking between the two.

"Sam! Mercedes says that she demands that you get your cute butt back to the dance floor!" Somebody shouted towards them, causing Sam to shake his head.

"Duty calls," he shrugged before taking off.

"So…the Warblers?" Kurt prompted, returning his attention back to Blaine.

"Yes Sir," Blaine nodded. "I was a part of the group when I attended Dalton, and then I ended up going back when I dropped out of college." He shrugged.

"Dropped out?" Kurt prompted curiously, wanting to know anything and everything about the beautiful man standing in front of him.

"I was taking pre-med, but it wasn't for me, so I dropped, went back to Westerville and now here I am," he said with a proud smile. "I honestly loved directing the Warblers, though. They're a great group."

"I remember," Kurt nodded, chuckling when Blaine gave him a confused look. "I was in the New Directions with Sam and all the other geeks running around this place." He gestured towards the party. "We competed against you guys one year. You were their lead, right?"

"That I was," Blaine said with a smile. "I thought I recognized you from somewhere. Those eyes are hard to miss." He looked Kurt over once more, smirking at the blush that began to creep over Kurt's cheeks. "You guys wiped the floor with us that year."

"We kind of did, didn't we?" Kurt let out a nervous chuckle. "You guys were great, though!" he said quickly as Blaine laughed a little.

"Can I grab you another drink?" he asked, nodding his head towards the doors before tilting it, waiting for an answer.

"Sure yeah, that'd be great," Kurt answered quickly, ignoring the fact that his brain was screaming to say no and walk away.

"Cool, I'll be right back." Blaine replied, shooting him yet another wink before beginning to head back inside. Fuck, he's sexy as hell,Kurt thought as he let his gaze follow the boy towards the door, watching as his hips slightly swung to the beat of the current song as he walked. There was something within him that wouldn't let him look away, even as Blaine disappeared through the door, and he couldn't understand why. He didn't even know this guy, and yet that's all he wanted. He wanted to know him, to spend more time with him, to kiss h- no, wait. He couldn't go there. He wanted to know him. That's all. Blaine was nothing more than an intriguing person who could be a good friend. Yes, a good friend.