Disclaimer: I do
not, nor ever shall, own any of the characters from Final Fantasy VIII.
Author's Note: I
wrote this at about three o'clock in the morning, fueled by a Mountain Dew
rush, so it's not the greatest. But I
don't think it's that bad, all things considered.
TWO HEARTS AS ONE
It was almost dusk, and the ridges in the barren ground were
difficult to see, but still Rinoa stumbled onward. The last reserves of her strength were nearly spent, and only the
force of her will drove her forward.
She had to reach Balamb Garden, she just had to! As long as two hearts beat as one in her
chest, there was still hope…
She paused at a narrow creek for a quick swallow of water,
and to let her legs, flushed a furious red as if sunburned, soak in the chilly
water. But only for a moment. Not even long enough for the shredded black
leather that hung down her thighs to absorb the moisture. Then she lurched to her aching feet.
Her reflection in the water stopped her. Mismatched eyes, blue and brown and divided
by a scar etched across her nose gazed dully back at her in the fading
light. Tousled hair, black with more
brown highlights than she remembered having, framed her face in unfamiliar
clumps. Rinoa shivered at the
strangeness, then pulled her gaze away.
She didn't have much longer, she knew.
And Garden was so far away…
This should never have happened, Rinoa thought
miserably. It had been such a simple
mission! Squall hadn't even seen the
need to drag along another experienced SeeD member. He'd figured this would be a good field exam for Rinoa and had
brought her alone.
Rinoa shivered and pulled Squall's leather jacket closer
around her, wishing it was Squall's arms around her shoulders keeping her
warm. Don't die on me, please, don't
die! she begged silently. The part
of her mind that radiated agony didn't respond to her pleas, and hadn't for the
last half hour. She was sure that was a
bad sign.
Rinoa stopped suddenly to get her bearings in the gathering
gloom. Her sorceress abilities were an
asset when it came to direction, but her head was still muddled. After all, she was no longer quite herself,
was she?
Squall had been asked to retrieve some files in an abandoned
military facility on the Centra continent.
Located so near Esthar and the Lunar Cry's landing site, the area was
filled with strange, powerful monsters, which was why an appeal was made to
SeeD for help. Squall had reluctantly
obliged, and decided to use the mission as instruction for Rinoa, who was
training to become a SeeD herself.
There had been monsters inside the facility. They were nothing Squall and Rinoa couldn't
handle, but there had been many in an enclosed area. And one of the magic-using creatures had used a Firaga near a gas
line. It had blown, throwing Rinoa
clear out of the room… but catching Squall before he could get out of the way.
Rinoa could still see his shattered form in her mind's
eye: his upper body had remained
virtually untouched, but below the waist, he'd been horrifically burned. His skin was charred black, except in the
gaping holes where shattered bone poked through. Blood poured from the arteries that hadn't been cauterized by the
heat, pooling around his body in an ever-widening puddle.
It was his face that had grabbed her attention. Despite the pain, he'd still been conscious. His surprisingly clear eyes were locked on
hers, and his mouth was dropped in a scream that only manifested as pained
grunts and inarticulate moans.
I'm running out of time… Rinoa knew this, as she
placed her hand on her chest, feeling an erratic heartbeat that wasn't quite
hers, nor even there in the physical sense, but it was a part of her all the
same. Oh God, I'm losing him!
But now she was close to home, she realized. She could hear the distant crashing of waves
on a beach through the roar of blood in her ears. Garden had to be resting nearby.
At Garden, she could get Squall the help he needed that no magic could
provide.
She'd tried a Curaga.
She'd tried a potion, a hi-potion, a megelixir, her GF's Recover
ability… anything that would heal Squall's shattered body. But, beyond staunching the blood flow in
areas less grievously wounded, the spells and items did nothing to help. She'd had no way to contact Garden – their
com device had melted in the blast - and she knew she couldn't run to Garden
and retrieve help in time to save him.
Nor would anyone come to search for them any time soon. And carrying his body was out of the
question.
At least, it was in the physical sense.
Rinoa had realized she'd only had one option: to junction
Squall's wounded body to her own.
It was more complex than junction a GF, but she knew it
could be done. Ultimecia had physically
melded with Griever, and Rinoa herself had been forced to merge with Adel. Only a sorceress could accomplish it.
So, taking what she had learned from their powers, she had
joined her body to Squall's taking on his physical and emotional agony and
blending it with her own. She hadn't
been prepared for the surge of unfamiliar thoughts and memories flooding her
mind, all colored with pain. The
intimacy of the joining had left her momentarily stunned.
Her whole body had fused with Squall's, and his severe burns
had become much less as it merged with Rinoa's healthy flesh. Her mind had been able to soothe his pain,
and Rinoa had begun to feel hopeful that perhaps everything would be okay after
all.
But her relief was short-lived. She could feel Squall dying inside of her. His thoughts, which had been joined to hers,
began to lose coherence and she could feel his very soul begin to weaken.
And now the time was almost up. But Garden was visible now, a vast shape illuminated against the
night sky. Rinoa gave a glad cry and
began to run awkwardly across the sands.
So eager was she to reach Garden that she didn't feel the other heartbeat
inside of her slow until the shifting sands sent her sprawling.
The shock of her fall cleared her head, and she gasped in
realization. "No!" she cried. "Don't
leave me! Not when we're so
close!" The gates were only a hundred
feet away; she dashed towards them using reserves of strength she hadn't known
she still possessed. "Almost there,"
she whispered over and over, passing through the gates and sprinting through
the lobby, shoving several students out of the way as she ran down the side
hall leading to the infirmary.
When she reached the infirmary, she felt a sharp pang in her
chest. She placed a hand over her heart
and screamed, falling forward into Dr. Kadowaki's arms.
The doctor demanded to know what was wrong, but Rinoa
couldn't answer. She'd burst into
uncontrollable sobs and buried her face in the older woman's shoulder. She couldn't speak; couldn't get any sound
past the lump in her throat except for her gasping sobs. With that last pain in her chest had come a
message: I love you, Squall had
whispered into her mind, his mental voice filled with more emotion than she'd
ever felt from him. But the surge of
emotion didn't overwhelm the wrenching feeling of her soul being torn asunder
as that other heartbeat finally stopped.
Dazed at experiencing Squall's moment of death, Rinoa tried
to unjunction his body from her own.
She couldn't. Squall's broken
form had blended far too completely with her own, both physically and mentally
as well, for she could still feel shreds of his memories inside her own
mind. She slumped against the wall of
the infirmary, sliding down it to huddle in a fetal position on the floor. She ignored the confused Dr. Kadowaki's attempts
to soothe her and draw out the full story.
Rinoa caught sight of her reflection in a metal bowl on a
shelf beside her, revealing the face that was not quite her own, and never
would be again. She would always wear
her failure to help Squall for all to see.
With a cry, she flung the bowl away from herself, almost hitting Dr.
Kadowaki with it. She buried her
transformed face in her hands and cried, realizing nothing would ever be right
in her world again.
